// Some thoughts on Sigmascape’s finale and denouement, while they’re still pretty fresh on my mind.
What Nero tells Cid is a very hard truth, and one that Cid has long been in denial of. The plain fact of the matter is that Cid is a hypocrite: preaching innovation to improve lives while all he does is leash himself to cleaning up the messes he makes himself responsible for. Marytring himself for every cause he can find, not simply because he is a kind, brave, heroic soul (which he is! but people can have more than one motivation for doing something and Cid is an excellent example of that) but because he’s using it as an excuse to run from what terrifies him the most: His own gift of innovation and invention.
If you notice, throughout the game we are presented with the fact that Cid as the boss of a major company is terrible. He’s a slacker, his budgeting skills are abysmal, and the Ironworks would not exist today if Jessie weren’t so damn good at what she does. He doesn’t do much related to his work at all - he encourages others to do it, and while he oversees a lot, you’ll notice that most of the practical work on everything he provides the warrior of light is done by others.
He’s essentially terrified of putting his hands to work again. Cid and Nero’s little exchange about the paintbrush prior to V6 touches on this: he can still dream up things, but somewhere along the way he’s lost sight of the spark that drove him to create, him to reach forward and actively dream of what he can create for the sake of creating it. Now, what happened at Bozja was terrible. The Calamity was terrible. (We can talk about the fact that the Empire was using a boy not yet out of school to make their death machines all we want, too, but that’s neither here nor there.)
But Cid has let those experiences and his fear of repeating them bind him, has let his guilt and fear trap him in chains of Duty and Responsibility so tightly and for so long that he’s lost sight of himself entirely. And Nero, bless him, lays it out flat for him while.. well, being laid out flat on the ground thanks to Omega.
And here’s where my real thoughts kick in. Cid is chained by duty but running from his skill and passion; in fact, he’s been hiding behind other people. He hid behind Biggs and Wedge for ages; with them stuck in recovery, he hid behind Nero. Now Nero’s been removed as well, and at the very end of the arc, he’s faced with a choice when Jessie makes her offer to help next time:
Does he let yet another person step up to do what he cannot bring himself to do, or does he get his act together and try to stand on his own two feet at last? He has the skill, that isn’t in question. What he lacks is confidence in himself and in his own work. So, as much as having Jessie along for the final stage of Omega would be fun? I really, really hope that doesn’t happen. Not because I dislike Jessie - I love her to bits, her Pepper Potts attitude toward Cid’s nonsense and all - but if she comes along she’ll just be giving Cid another avenue to escape, to hide, and he knows it.
And I, for one, want to see what Cid nan Garlond can really do when he stops holding back; when he stops running from himself and his self-inflicted limitations.
