#otherhc

A Challenge in Three

A picture of a best friend: Remember when a bunch of teenaged fairies glamoured the Town Hall into the Eiffel Tower for their high school prank or whatever?  Pegs and Lilo Lopez posed in front of it, because with a baby they probably weren’t going to Paris any time soon. Aren’t those sunglasses great??  I told Pegs they’d look good right up until she was 85 years old.  Anyway, Pegs is my best friend, so I cut Lopez out of the photo, my bad.

Here’s Freddie Confetti giving one of his signature ‘Darling, I know you’re trying to make a point but if it goes on for much longer I’m going to have to turn you into a deflating balloon because it would probably make more sense than you, yeah?  And if you dare condescend to Ollie one more time I shan’t have much patience pip pip tally ho, jolly good, you tosser donkey’s arse muppet’.  Or whatever the British say, I don’t know.  

A picture of me: We went to the beach and Tuah was so embarrassed to have his photo taken by this weird old couple.  Okay granted the old couple were REALLY weird, I mean the old man kept dry washing his hands and going ‘eh heh heh hheh hehe’  and the old lady kept nodding and saying in a high child-voice ‘yes, you two are perfect, just perfect, such sweetie-sweets-sweet’  so Tuah really didn’t want his photo taken?  But I was like what the hell, blue-hair and turtle-dude are going to drop dead like tomorrow, let them get their old-people jollies.  Regardless, Tuah borrowed my baseball cap to hide his face,  Can’t hide that sweetie-sweets-sweet smile of his though.  Aw.

A picture of a significant other: I mean, look I know, believe me.  Bellamy’s done some bad shit.  The shit I saw first hand and then there was the shit she told me about - no, screamed at me at the top of her lungs, in graphic details.  And then shit she talked about in a dull voice, monotone but no less informational.  Bellamy doesn’t pull any punches when it comes to taking credit for the things she’s done.  How her tone went from pleased and delighted, to ‘I don’t care’, to ‘I liked it because it was wrong’, to ‘what have I done’, to ‘how do I live with this’.  Look at this moment of absolute clarity, stunning sorrow, eternal regret.  I love her, I do.

(ooc)

In Iann’s cabinets, he’s got mostly Dr Bronners items - the peppermint hair creme (for his moustache), liquid soap and lip balm, and the lemongrass-lime shaving soap and lime body balm for dry skin.  He stocks a collection of Neem toothpaste, dental floss and electric toothbrush head replacements.  He uses a regular razor, not a straight-edge.  

“Layers” Character Meme (I answered most of this OOC)

LAYER ONE : THE OUTSIDE

Name: Iann Cardero

Eye Color: dark brown

Hair Style/Color: black, unkempt like he just woke up

Height: 6′0″

Clothing Style: well-constructed, layered when he can

Best Physical Feature: his eyebrows? they’re very expressive

LAYER TWO: THE INSIDE

Your Fears: being controlled, physical pain, and death

Your Guilty Pleasure: Iann is a hedonist; he considers ‘guilty pleasure’ an oxymoron

Your Biggest Pet Peeve: uninformed immutable assumptions

Your Ambition for the Future: staying alive and invigorated about life

LAYER THREE: THOUGHTS

Your First Thoughts Waking Up: “ok ok ok what’s on the list for today”

What You Think About the Most: supernatural everything

What You Think About Before Bed: usually plans for the next day unless he’s tired then he just blanks out

You Think Your Best Quality Is: Iann loves being useful, he puts more merit in his usefulness than he realizes

LAYER FOUR: WHAT’S BETTER?

Single or Group Dates: Iann’s willing to try either, for science the experience.

To be Loved or Respected: Neither is particularly necessary, but being respected is more pragmatic.

Beauty or Brains: braaaaaaaains.  

Dogs or Cats: neither, Iann isn’t an animal-person

LAYER FIVE: DO YOU?

Lie: Yes, if it suits his greater goal.

Believe in Yourself: Iann believes in his ability.

Believe in Love: Not really.

Want Someone: When he is with someone, he is completely devoted.

LAYER SIX: EVER?

Been on Stage: Nope!

Done Drugs: Yes!  Mostly to experiment.

Changed Who You Were to Fit In: If Iann had an ulterior purpose for personal gain, he’d put on whatever mask was needed.

LAYER SEVEN: FAVORITES

Favorite Color: orange

Favorite Animal: HONEYBEES.  EVERYTHING NEEDS MORE BEES.

Favorite Movie: Jurassic Park

Favorite Game: mindgames. LOL just kidding.

LAYER EIGHT: AGE

Birthdate: June 13

How Old Will You Be: 40

Age You Lost Your Virginity: 19

Does Age Matter: of course it does.

LAYER NINE: IN A PERSON

Best Personality: interesting

Best Eye Color:  sparkling

Best Hair Color: clean

Best thing to do With a Partner: intense cerebral stimulation

LAYER TEN: FINISH THE SENTENCE (answered in-character)

I love: me.

I feel: I don’t know.  Functional?  Whatever.

I hide: my garmonbozia.

I miss: nothing.  The past is over, it’s done.

they found a book of spells? He’d take it to an available pal-witch and demand to know what it says, since regular humans can’t read grimoires.

a stranger asked them for a hug? He’d say no and please do not attempt.

they were invited to join a secret organization? omg he’d would jump at the chance and then try to subvert it from the inside because he hates secret plutocracies.

their closest friend suddenly stopped talking to them?  He’d assume Melissa was angry about something she couldn’t explain so he’d poke her until she exploded.  With other people, Iann would first make sure they were alive/well and then he’d leave them alone. Their choice.

someone anonymously wrote something mean about them? He’d pin it prominently on the cork board near the Mal Ojo cash counter so customers could read it.

the upcoming end of the world was announced? He’d be surprised at how sad and disappointed he was, then if he couldn’t prevent the apocalypse he’d become extremely angry and sullen.

they did something to disappoint someone in their life? It would not haunt him. Other person’s choice if they still wanted him in their life afterwards.  If Melissa was disappointed then he’d work to improve himself.

they learned they needed a surgery? Fuck no, he’d either perform it himself or call on his many supernatural contacts to do it somehow.

the plumbing in their home stopped working? He’d fix it.  

someone insulted their best friend?  He’d demand they explain and rationalize their insult.  If someone insulted Melissa he’d probably get very irritated and react accordingly depending on who the person was. 

they were asked to join a scientific experiment? He’d be 100% on board and either learn a lot and/or try to take it over because he knows what everyone’s doing wrong and they’re all wrong and he can do it right.

they found out they or their significant other were expecting a child? AHHH HA HA then they’d have to work really fucking fast to ensure the demon doesn’t get their firstborn’s soul. 

a stranger gave them flowers? He’d give the flowers back and say ‘you have the wrong person’.  Unless the flowers were rare/supernatural in which case he’d ask ‘do you have any more?’

they couldn’t find their keys? "MELISSA! HONEY! WHERE'D I PUT MY KEYS??”

Overall, Iann is attracted if the other person chooses to be attractive to him - that’s really all it takes! If someone refuses his attention or if they expect him to ‘impress’ them, he will lose interest and move on. Fascinating people are everywhere.

Iann actively avoids ‘looking for romance’ but he can be romantically attracted to someone who stimulates his mind.  They don’t have to be super-intelligent or mega-profound, there just has to be something about their way of thinking that makes Iann’s brain go ‘oh wow’.  Continuous moments of mental ‘oh wow’s can massage his atrophied emotional psyche into affection.