Maester Otegryn: I am Rodrick's physician, and I just treated him for a "shattered penis".
Elaena: That was my bad. Sorry.
(Elaena and Rodrick high five)
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Maester Otegryn: I am Rodrick's physician, and I just treated him for a "shattered penis".
Elaena: That was my bad. Sorry.
(Elaena and Rodrick high five)

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Duncan: Only this morning in the courtyard, I saw a horse with two heads and two bodies!
Rodrick: Two horses standing next to each other?
Duncan: ... Yes, I suppose it could have been.
Rodrick: Honestly, Duncan, I bet you're just the sort of person who thinks that sticking your finger up a sheep's bottom on Red Friday will make you fertile!
Otegryn: That's rubbish!
Rodrick: Quite, really.
Otegryn: It's Purple Monday.
Rodrick: Yes, remind me not to shake your hand during a religious festival.
Royland: Brothers and sisters are natural enemies. Like Dornish Men and Westerosi. Or Wildlings and Westerosi. Or Ironborn and Westerosi. Or Westerosi and Westerosi. Damn Westerosi! They ruined Westeros!
Otegryn: You sure are a contentious bunch.
Royland: You just made an enemy for life!