Would you happen to have any ideas for what kinds of arms Carki would try to sell Vince and co.? The more comically-90s, the better. (I've been thinking of drawing a tiny fraction of her wares, but keep coming up mostly blank)
Well, I came up with a few, IDK if they’re enough, but…
Gunbladegun: A gunthat shoots bullets with swordlike projectiles, which have asecondary firing mechanism designed to fire in flight meant to causethem to vibrate and drive them further into their target. Nobody hasany idea whether this actually works.
Auto-69: A gun whosebullets have a secondary heat-seeking gyrojet attachment that directsall shots to home in straight on the groin! Killing ‘emRobocop-style!
Nudeoray: Lookingmore like the Austin Powers school of aesthetic design rather thanthe Todd McFarlane one, this gun basically strips an opponent of alltheir clothes/covering. Which is actually pretty useful. Just don’tpoint it at a naked opponent. Because it considers their skin“clothing” in that case. And ammo for the thing is expensive.
Babymaker: Not whatyou think! Well, okay, it is made out of flesh and extremely phallic.But it isn’t like that, it just shoots babies! Murderous flesh-eatingmonster babies that make the baby from Its Alive look like a normalbaby but still! Just don’t ask how you refill the ammo!
Brainsaw: It’s achainsaw, where the blades are actually made of psychic energy!Complete with the capacity of using PSI attacks! Fueled by the brainsof your enemies, which you can extract with a handy attachment thatmakes it technically not a war crime!
Johnny 5 One ManWarcrimes-Conviction: For those tricky situations where “ethics”aren’t really important, works as a white-phosphorous flamethrowerand a thrower of disease-filled sludge, has a torturerifficsledgehammer-taser-hybrid bayonette, shoots mustard and chlorine gasgrenades, and a main gun specifically designed for shooting a mini-nuke! Don’t worry, it’s only a dirty bomb!
Jesus Killer:Through the miracles of nanotechnology, this gun shoots entirecrosses that automatically crucify all those in their path! If youpay for the deluxe version, when they reach the end of theirflightpath the crosses begin loudly playing Marylyn Manson!
The Killfucker OneBillion: It has a grappling hook that pulls your opponent in, whereit procedes to rip out their soul to fire in a massive spiritualblast; melt down the soft tissues into basically napalm, and afterthat coat the bones with metal to fire them out of the railgunbarrel! When you need one specific human-size-or-less motherfuckerdead, and you want to make every motherfucker in the room dead withthem!
These items are free to use as you see fit under a CC-BY-Vanilla license so long as I; Thomas F. Johnson, am credited as their creator! God help you all you poor sons of bitches!