#omnibvs

TL;DR— the sense of “family” by any normal means is no total mystery to him, but he doesn’t feel that obligation to always stick with them if he didn’t like it.  He doesn’t prefer his past family… very much.  (Now if he were to have his own family, that’d probably be a different matter entirely.)

Jesse was born and raised in a slightly rich neighbourhood, his father very recently got his own estate out in the outskirts of one of Zofia’s cities — except they were at the very bottom of the noble ladder.  His father was a master architect and teaches others how to do construction work using the stars as a guide to building places/temples/roads/etc.  Before him, Jesse’s grandfather was an ol’ townie carpenter who just wanted to build shelters for his friends to have roofs over their heads and live cozily (but he did get calls to help build more shelters elsewhere and his handiwork spread despite being a commoner).  Jesse’s father pushed and took it a step further to have a more ‘social” life closer to the royal circles, so he learned to read and write from a very young age, taught himself to read silently (as was the show of “intelligence” in the middle ages, usually among the aristocracy).  Before he was even twelve (usually the age boys become apprentices), he got his education in architecture and astronomy from a semi-poor school, the rest of his lessons were self-taught by “borrowed” books from the royal libraries to further his learning.

Jesse’s mother came from a similar low ranking noble house as a pedigree match — her family were more about tailoring fashionable clothes for the servants/knights/maids and assisting in libraries at castles.  The library was initially where she met his father, and they were soon wed for having similar life goals and their careers worked well together as a pair.

As young as Jesse could remember, his parents were pressuring him to work on his studies, to read, to write, to interact with specific people (to gain favorability) and to be on his best behaviour around the higher nobility.  His parents wanted to climb higher on the ladder to get a better house, better pay, to be served.  At first, they didn’t know what they wanted their son to pursue — become a knight as a “quick way” to climb that ladder, or be in his father’s footsteps as an architect and work harder to be recognized as a royal builder.  During all this, Jesse grew to become more fed up with curfews to be home by 4, two hours before supper at 6; fed up with constant studying when he wanted his free time; fed up with his parents’ bipolar superiority and suck-up attitudes depending on the people they’re around; fed up with trying to be a people pleaser at social events; fed up of being ordered he shouldn’t talk to his new buddy he made the day before.

Aside from the family drama, his parents spoiled Jesse by taking him to horse shows, cross-country tourisms, watch theatre in the town square (an interest both his parents loved, but Jesse loathed sitting for seemingly nine hours of).  Was only allowed a toy sword (that broke) and a splitting axe (which he found he didn’t like using that much, even to chop firewood).  Only thing holding them back from going all out was they weren’t very wealthy, which they hope to change to be more extravangant like their neighbors.  Eating meals at restaurants and good taverns (Jesse’s favourite places to eat even with stuffy “manners” at some) were far different than very particular meals at home—far too many sweets and little meat without some sort of sweetened seasoning.  

By roughly age fourteen, he’d come home late often, sometimes so late he wouldn’t show until the next morning for breakfast (began to prefer sleeping in stables or up in trees - he grew to enjoy that lifestyle compared to sleeping in his stuffy, boring bedchamber with only two windows).  Jesse wanted to lead his own life, not follow anyone or have them decide for him.  His adventurous habits to be free grew every year until one day he finally noticed there was a young light brown-haired boy in his parent’s estate whom he assumed to be their servant (from how quiet and mute he seemed, like following everything his parents told him to do).  After a really bad fight, he finally left with a final goodbye letter and never wished to look back, wishing to not cause any more grievances.

It isn’t until some time post war when he reluctantly returns to visit his birthplace that Jesse realizes that boy was no servant but his actual little brother he somehow missed arriving for a good few years.  By the time he sees him again, though, that boy would be pretty distant from Jesse with distaste towards him — as far as his brother’s concerned, Jesse unofficially disowned himself from that family so now that boy was raised to inherit everything and he’s accepted that.  He’s become an apprentice of a royal architect who may be guaranteed a job at building new royal castles/manors/estates, which was exactly what their father was achieving for.

Although he is technically Zofian, Jesse doesn’t… consider himself one.  His identity would be a free man with no obligation to anything—he’s a free bird who wishes to lead his own life (solo or with a flock, the latter is preferable because who doesn’t love company?).  Unfortunately, some traits/habits had been ingrained into him and Jesse’s been working hard to break out of those (or hide them as best as he could) because then they’re very obvious signs of coming from some sort of nobility.  

For one, he can read but doesn’t write as well since he skipped out on most of his studies, his academics fell behind in that area.  When his own mercenary kingdom comes around, he vastly improves his writing with the aid of others (his atrocious messy handwriting becoming… less so but still messy). His table manners aren’t very telling either, but there’s a distinctive “regal” air to it with how he handles the utensils and eating with his mouth shut (unless he’s talking).  Many might pass up as him trying to mimic a king for his own country, though.

He notices all of these little things (as far as he’s aware of) in himself and has come up with excuses for them on why he’s got xyz habit or abc trait similar to nobles.