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It's second nature, the way he tries to convince himself that he doesn’t feel anything more for him than friendship (if even that), and, every time, he’s met with a stark sensation of longing in his chest. He swallows the hot burn of misplaced anger in his throat, fire racing through his body, and pushes everything out of his head, shuts Cas out and pretends he feels nothing; it's easier this way.
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Sometimes Dean stares at Cas when he thinks he can't see him, from the the corner of his eye, when Cas is too busy to notice, and most times? He pretends that he isn't looking, that he doesn't care, but it's a lie; he's always looking at Cas; always looking out for him--when they raid drug stores, when they're on supply runs, when they're running for their lives. It's second nature, how every instinct in him screams at him to look out for Cas, to protect him, make sure he's safe.
ohfearlessleader started following you
"You've got...a little something, on your face."
ohfearlessleader said: eeeee ;u;
{He is the cutest bby, yes?
Dean walks in Castiel's cabin at 12 am as if he lives there--there was light leaking around the edges of Cas' door--and throws a chocolate bar wrapped in tin foil on Castiel's bed. "Don't say I never did anything for you" he says plainly, wryly, gesturing at the chocolate bar, hoping it'd make Cas feel kinda better--he knows he's had a rough day and he sure as hell doesn't wanna talk feelings with Cas,but he can at least give him this for now.
With his arms folded across his chest, and his back lay flat on the couch, Castiel swung his legs over the back of it in order to remain on the piece of furniture as he stared up at his cabin ceiling. There were various ‘rituals’ he completed in the middle of the night to relax, ranging from yoga, to reading, to simply studying the contour of the walls and ceiling; it allowed him to fixate on something other than patrolling, or anything he had seen that day that he would much rather erase.
That, or the fact that most nights he couldn’t sleep and had to otherwise occupy himself.
Just as he was about to start studying the ceiling, he heard the all-but familiar scuff of boots on the front porch outside, though the movements were hardly hesitant as they stepped inside without announcing or knocking. “Come in.” Castiel commented, releasing a quiet chuckle as he heard his Leader move across the room and stop a short distance away. Swinging his legs back around, the ex-angel removed himself from the couch to see what the late-night visit was all about — not that this wasn’t anything new, since he often received midnight callings from Dean.
"Now, why would I do that?" Castiel replied, a hint of amusement in his tone before his attention was taken by the chocolate bar thrown on his bed. A large grin made its way on the soldier’s face - incredulous - before he sat on the edge of his bed and took hold of the treat. He guessed that it was a good raid, because anything sweet was difficult to salvage. “Who’d you kill to get this for me, huh?” However way he was given it, it didn’t take much persuading for Castiel to open the seal and break off a piece to pop in his mouth. To say he was ecstatic was an understatement, but he sure as hell was grateful, because these past few days had been a whirl-wind of stress.
"Thanks, Dean, I appreciate it." Another chuckle escaped his mouth, and he was more than happy to offer a piece to his Leader. Sharing is caring, y’know.
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ohfearlessleader replied to your post:
WELL, WE CANT HAVE IT ALL SER!!!!
weLL I CAN DAMN WELL TRY.
ohfearlessleader replied to your post:
salt and burn it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
bUT THEN I WONT HAVE A LAPTOP SOBS INTO HANDS
I think that your muse is afraid of seeing dean die tbh
"I'd rather not think about that."
(/ooc You already knew that! I discussed it via Touch.)
