i wanted to get this fic out in the beginning of this month, but that (obviously) didn't happen. and then i decided i wanted to re-write everything in the past tense (it's easier for me, it's how my brain works, i have to constantly be fighting myself whenever i write in the present tense) even though i've been challenging myself to write in the present tense so i can get better at it, and i only got the first few scenes done but somehow ended up adding 3k words (a record in one sitting, mind you) and idk, i feel like i don't know what i'm doing. i keep adding shit but is it actually contributing to the story? am i just adding words just to say i did? wordcounts aren't really important to me as long as the story makes me feel things. but like yeah, this is the biggest most complicated fic i've ever written (the worldbuilding goes hard) but and i just feel like i don't know what i'm doing and this story is important to me and i don't want to fuck it up and i want to make sure i can convey what i want to say.
but i'm also so excited to share it and like i want to get it out as fast as possible, but i also don't want to rush and put out something i', not proud of and idk do you other fic writers ever feel this way?
