#octantis

First word

First steps

First flying

Monarch and Octantic by @nebuladreamz

Somi by @smoljeanius

Val by @dazzlingsystem

Oscar had learnt astronomy just for Logan. He never cared for it, finding it boring to engulf yourself in the lights of the sky. But ever since Logan had told him that he loved astronomy, he had a desire to learn more to just connect with Logan about it. Logan had been Oscar’s North star, Polaris; Oscar’s way back home. Logan was Oscar’s home. Everywhere he went, Oscar sought out. Polaris was bright, shining brightly despite the dark that tries to dim its light. It reminded Oscar much of Logan; despite all the challenges on and off track, Logan seemed to get through it with that smile of his. His eyes would crinkle and his lips would curl into a toothy smile, and his American accent. The way words would sculpt themselves into those that fit Logan’s voice. 

Ever since F1 started for the both of them, Oscar found it hard to cope. Difficult to maintain the relationships that he once had, to even have time to himself without burying himself into data and training. Fortunately, Lando was like a lifeline, pulling him from the isolating grip of F1. Oscar never felt so sequestered anymore, his days spent shouting and laughing through video calls with Lando and his friends. His once silent and kept-to-himself nature was gone, replaced by a personality that was all smiles. Some might even call him a cat. 

Despite everything that had been going on in Oscar’s life, he had never felt like he was trapped in a dead end before. Not until this one race. He hadn’t scored the place that he wanted to, his expectations burning at him. How difficult was it to even make it to the podium? P4? Really? Oscar knew he could do better, he must. Anger stirred and boiled and popped in his blood, his anger controlling him like a pawn on a checkerboard. Of course, his day had gotten so much worse. He just wanted to take a walk around the paddock, to try and relieve his anger.  But someone had been careless enough to bump into him. A scoff left his lips before he could even think of a response. 

“Watch it.” Oscar lifted his head, ready to give the other person a piece of his mind. How dare- 

Oh.

“Oscar.” The American accent weaved its way into Oscar’s heart once more, pulling at his heart like a guitar. It had been so long since Oscar last seen Logan. His hair had grown out, he was visibly thinner. Logan’s sunglasses did little to hide the tentative hope in his eyes. Oscar’s anger still boiled in his mind, wishing to attack like a predator just to have a sense of feeling normal again. “Oh,” he muttered out, pulling his lips into his mouth, teeth pulling the skin apart. “Logan.” Oscar offered, he nodded hoping to conceal his anger. He couldn’t mess this meeting up. But with every passing second of the silence, his anger grew again like a relentless wave. 

A streak of disappointment painted Logan’s face before he schooled it into an unreadable one. 

“How are you-” 

“I have to go-”

Oscar didn’t want to lash out at Logan, he didn’t deserve any of it. It only broke his heart further, knowing that Logan wanted to reconnect again, to fill the drift that they had created. The sun seemed to shine brighter, reflecting off Logan’s sunglasses. “If you don’t mind..” Oscar shuffled his feet past Logan, trudging towards Mclaren. Maybe after they could talk once more, to contain the void that was created. 

Polaris seemed to drift further. 

You

Hey

Sorry for today, I had a meeting. You’d get it. 

A meeting, yeah right. Oscar wanted to delete that last message. “You’d get it”? “You’d get it”?

You

Hey

Sorry for today, I had a meeting. You’d get it. 

                                                            Seen 11:46

Fuck. 

Logan

 Oh yeah dude. No worries. 

Oscar couldn’t mess up now. He had everything on the line. 

So

How have you been 

He could only hope Logan found peace in Williams, that his team was treating him well. Even through his challenges on track.

As well as I can in a WIlliams haha

You?

That could mean nothing and everything. Was Logan well? What about his relationship with Alex? Were they on good terms?

Great

Meeting Lando had been the best day since 

Lando and his friends are great, they’re practically my everyday life now 

Was it too far? Did Oscar hurt Logan just by talking about Lando? They hadn’t talked for what felt like years and all Oscar could talk about was his new friends. 

Oh, really? I’ve never met them before 

Tell me

Maybe it wasn't that bad of an idea. Oscar went on a rant of every person he met through Lando, their personalities matching one another bringing them endless adventures and jokes in their everyday life. Before he even knew it, he had talked Logan’s ear off for 1 hour and possibly more. 

It’s late, I hope I didn’t bore you with all the stories

Thanks mate, night

The void, much like a terrorising fire, was doused, contained. 

Yeah, no worries

Ever since that night, Oscar had found it more difficult to talk to Logan due to his busy schedule and his lack of communication skills. He couldn’t embarrass himself in front of Logan, what kind of new impression would that be to him? Oscar just hoped that they would have a chance again, not letting a fire of some sort burn them. 

Logan

Happy birthday

¼ to 100!

Logan had remembered Oscar’s birthday and even went the extra mile to wish him at exactly midnight where a new day arrived. He would cry if he weren’t so drunk in that bar in Montreal. 

Maybe Oscar should’ve replied, not getting wasted in a bar. 

Logan

Im sorrru

Sorry 

I thitjk i drank ttoo mkcuh

tqhaks for evryerhting 

Your’e my best friend eveb id im nit yousr

yorue my south satr the octiatis

Everything went by in a blur. Oscar had broken into Logan’s hotel, in his bathroom. He tried making Logan vomit the pills and alcohol out of his system, but Logan only flopped around like a fish out of water. He wept for someone out of reach yet the body was in his hands. 

Constellations - Part II: Octantis