#oc:lavan

Q: Name? A: “Who's asking?”

Q: Are you single? A: "Yeah, and that's the way it's going to stay, thank you."

Q: Are you happy? A: He snorts.

Q: Are you angry? A: "Not sure I have the energy for that anymore. This isn't a personal growth thing, I'm just exhausted."

Q: Are your parents still married? A: "What parents?"

NINE FACTS

Q: Birth Place? A: "Fuck if I know."

Q: Hair Color? A: "Red."

Q: Eye Color? A: "White."

Q: Birthday? A: "13th day, 11th month. On paper, at least."

Q: Mood? A: He makes a vague, uncertain gesutre.

Q: Gender? A: "Does it matter?"

Q: Summer or winter? A: "Summer? I guess?"

Q: Morning or afternoon? A: "Mornings."

EIGHT THINGS ABOUT YOUR LOVE LIFE?

Q: Are you in love? A: "Unfortunately."

Q: Do you believe in love at first sight? A: "Whoever does is a moron."

Q: Who ended your last relationship? A: "I would've needed to be in one for someone to end it."

Q: Have you ever broken someone’s heart? A: "Not that I know of."

Q: Are you afraid of commitments? A: "Next question."

Q: Have you hugged someone within the last week? A: "Have you?"

Q: Have you ever had a secret admirer? A: "Don't know, don't care. It's their own personal problem."

Q: Have you ever broken your own heart? A: "This is where I joke about not having one, I guess."

SIX CHOICES

Q: Love or Lust? A: "Lust. It's a lot easier to deal with."

Q: Lemonade or iced tea? A: "If it's not caffeinated, I don't want it."

Q: Cats or Dogs? A: "Cats."

Q: A few best friends or many regular friends? A: "A few close ones."

Q: Wild night out or romantic night in? A: "Wild night out."

Q: Day or night? A: "Night, definitely."

FIVE HAVE YOU EVERS

Q: Been caught sneaking out? A: "Does desertion count?"

Q: Fallen down/up the stairs? A: "Many times."

Q: Wanted something/someone so badly it hurt? A: He hesitates. "You could say, yeah."

Q: Wanted to disappear? A: "Yeah. Pulled it off, too."

FOUR PREFERENCES

Q: Smile or eyes? A: "Eyes."

Q: Shorter or Taller? A: "I don't really care, if I'm being honest."

Q: Intelligence or Attraction? A: "Intelligence."

Q: Hook-up or Relationship? A: "Hook-up. I don't like dealing with the rest."

FAMILY

Q: Do you and your family get along? A: "I don't really have any. Even if I did, I don't think we would."

Q: Would you say you have a “messed up life”? A: "Nooo, what gave you that idea?"

Q: Have you ever ran away from home? A: "I guess desertation does count on this one."

Q: Have you ever gotten kicked out? A: "Not really. I try to lay low."

FRIENDS

Q: Do you secretly hate one of your friends? A: "Yeah, but I wouldn't say I do it in secret, he knows perfectly well." He pauses. "Not that he's my friend to begin with."

Q: Do you consider all of your friends good friends? A: "I'm still deciding."

Q: Who is your best friend? A: "...nobody? What grown man has a ''best friend''?"