#nollithecreator

I consider this a universal Christmas gift in the sense of the Universe itself gave it to me. Today I woke up and had a message from a young girl in Malaysia that liked a project I was working on for cosplay with my nephew - the Bonehead Project.

She wanted to know if she could buy the template from me. I didn’t design the template to be sold, meaning that the files were not well organized, there were no instructions, and the template had not been totally fine tuned. A few measurements off here or there, etc.

Also, I didn’t even know what to charge for that. It was a pet project for my nephew and I. I asked the young girl, “how much would you expect to pay for something like that?” She answered $5-$15. I looked up helmet templates and she was right. So I told her for $5 I’d work the files in with some directions and send it her way.

This is officially my first sold item. Everything else I’ve done up until now has been favors, portfolio projects, or charity work.

That was probably the best present of all this year. Satisfaction of acknowledgement on an international level by one human being.

Thank you God, thank you Instagram, thank you young girl from Malaysia!

I am definitely not good at this whole social media thing. I see what many people are always viewing and I don’t get it; I’m more intrigued by what happens right in front of me on the daily than I am at what’s playing on YouTube or being tweeted on Twitter, or posted on Facebook and Instagram.

Yet, to be successful, I need to be better at media posts and share more on these outlets just to be able to find my audience.

I know there’s other people out there, like me, feeling out of place because they’re philosophy of life doesn’t really quite line up with our society’s norms, expectations, or laws. I know there are people out there that have yet to accept themselves for whatever they feel they are deep inside, and that unacceptance leads them down a depressing life path, maybe accompanied by addictions, a life of lies, and ultimately self-destructive behaviors and thoughts of or actions toward suicide.

I know... and yet I cannot figure out how to really reach them. Because, like me, they probably don’t see much of a point in... well, this.

I have a feeling, like something nudging me, that I am suppose to help with suicide prevention. Inspire people that feel a lack of purpose or place, but I haven’t come to find my own just yet. I haven’t come to understand where my own art even even comes from, except to see patterns and connections in things I make to things I didn’t know existed before me.

On some subconscious level, I think we - those of us looking for our place - are simply trying to find where we left off in the last life. Like trying to remember a lost thought, and the frustration of the vague memory, like a forgotten word being on the tip of your tongue, is maddening. We are so close to a break through, but time has blocked our recall.

::sigh::

There’s a thought for today.