#noindexcheese

Take 5. Spoiler alert! You know the saying that goes, third time’s the charm? Well, this isn’t the third time, and it’s certainly not the charm either. I walk into the CVS on Pennsylvania Avenue, on the GW campus, on a sunny Wednesday afternoon. I have yet to realize the disappointment I’m going to feel over the block cheese selection here.

CVS stands for Convenience, Value, and Service. To be honest, with all the experiences I’ve had with CVS, I’ve really only seen the Convenience aspect at play. What value? What service?

Ok, before I really start hating on this store, let me go back to the cheese so that you can understand why. I stay on the ground floor and head towards the refrigerated section in the back, because I know that the upstairs section has no food. I start seeing all these grab-and-go foods. Sandwiches, pretzels and hummus, protein bars. Fine, that’s normal for a convenience store. Let’s find the cheese, though.

I turn the corner  and see the dairy section. I think I’m getting close. Milk, more milk, sliced provolone cheese, (bottom right) kraft cheese singles (are you even surprised?), butter… and then I see it. A single block of Kraft sharp cheddar cheese (bottom left). THAT’S IT? And it’s $6.39. Is that a joke?

No way. I keep looking in desperation. My eyes scan over the whole refrigerated section. If I see one more butter or fake butter option (top picture), I think I might throw up. Forget “value” and

“service.” In what world is it considered convenient to have only a single block cheese option available?

I apologize. Turns out there’s another block cheese available: Cracker Barrel’s extra sharp cheddar (bottom right). Wait, is that the same Cracker Barrel that you see on the way to like Delaware? Also, what if I don’t want sharp cheddar cheese? Well, then the message we get here is that that’s unfortunate. The C in CVS won’t be there for you.

I get it. My expectations are too high. But you know what? Northwest D.C. has some really great block cheese options, so my expectations SHOULD be high. Shoutout to Whole Foods, Safeway, Trader Joe’s, and Dean & DeLuca. All the minor issues I had with your cheese selections are nothing compared to this. At least you had a selection to begin with!

So, @CVS, do you really think that anyone’s going to be dying to buy your two wonderful block cheese options? I guess desperate times call for desperate measures, and that’s how you make your profit. You even increase your prices because you’re charging people for the convenience, too. Whatever. That’s enough for now. This is obviously not a store for a Manchego lover, and I should have known that. But even besides that, can you have a single block cheese option that’s not sharp cheddar? Jeez! Bottom line: if you want any other block cheese besides sharp cheddar and you’re at CVS, f.o.r.g.e.t. it.