#nkadri

Freddie Andersen - watching you get off

Garret Sparks - pleasing you however he can

Mo Rielly - lingerie (on you)

Nazem Kadri - lingerie (on himself- listen nazem kadri in silk panties is the hill I choose to die on ok)

Patrick Marleau - threesomes with Christina (aka the dream ok don’t kinkshame me)

I ain’t gonna fight you babe, because you’re absolutely right

You didn’t really think you had much of a thing for facial hair. Sure, it looked great on Naz when he was able to grow it out a bit. However, during the playoffs, he had you bent over the couch, his beard scraping against your back while he kissed a line between your shoulders. Ever since then, you were very, very into the beard.

1. Kevin Hayes2. Freddie Andersen3. Gabe Landeskog4. Nazem Kadri5. Jordie Benn

Fight: Frederik Andersen and Nazem Kadri

Plot twist of your plot twist, this one doesn’t even happen during a game, it happens during practice. 

The night before, the team were all hanging out and eating pizza and cooing over pictures of the new baby Gardiner and Freddie had specifically ordered his own (small) pie because he’s the only one on the team who likes no sauce, spinach, ricotta, and mushroom. He had three of the four slices and was planning on eating the last one after he was done with his turn of flipping through Jake’s phone to see the 15 new pictures of Henry smiling. He got up and went to the kitchen to see his pizza box was empty.

He was Mad. 

That is Freddie’s Pizza™. Everyone KNOWS that is Freddie’s Pizza. Nobody fucks with their goalie and nobody fucks with his pizza.

He was snappy the rest of the night. Nobody fessed up. Freddie saw Kappy’s guilty face and assumed it was him.

Practice the next day was miserable for Kappy. Freddie was harsh, especially with him. He picked apart every shot Kappy made at him with brutal intensity and eventually the kid cracked.

“It wasn’t me,” he said quietly, his voice almost breaking. “It was Naz. He said it looked really good. We were the only ones in the kitchen. He said I wasn’t allowed to tell otherwise he’d say it was me. I don’t even like mushrooms, Freddie. They taste like feet.”

Who wins this fight? Freddie.

Naz is no match for a livid pizza-deprived goalie coming full-speed at him.