When you FEEL GOOD, your mind is anticipating some form of positive result that you are wanting to have. When you feel bad, your mind is expecting results that you don't want. Our negative emotions are signals that let us know that if we continue to have the perspective - attitude - or behavior that is causing the negative emotions, something that you don't want to happen has a high likelyhood of happening. You get what you expect. Denying what you expect, running away from what you expect, and ignoring what you expect, will only make you doubt yourself more and more. Take your expectations for what they are, and choose how you would like to train them to be from that point onwards. Your expectations are your expectations, and they are what they are. Once you know what they are you can train your way into expectations that are geared more towards positive results in the areas that you would like to see some changes. Here's an example: An anon just wrote saying they can't tell if I want to talk to them or if I am just being polite, so they choose not to bother me. That probably doesn't feel very good. And, instead of asking me if they're bothering me, they likely decide to just not send a message at all. A negative expectation can lead to them getting a result that they probably didn't want. Note: I appreciate your compassion in having a desire to not bother me. I appreciate the love and concern. Just know that I'll let you know if I don't want to talk. So you can message me. So what are some reasons why anon would think that? Well, they'd have to answer that themselves...Once you know why you really feel that way though, you can begin to train yourself to have new expectations if that's what you want to do. Just ask yourself some questions that challenge that belief. What if I wasn't bothered and you sent a message anyway? You still wouldn't know whether I was bothered unless I said so, so you might as well send the message. Don't let doubt keep you from having a positive experience. A few bad experiences doesn't mean every experience will be bad, though we tend to begin to expect more of the same. You will get more of what you expect. What if every experience is not negative? What if by changing your perception you change what attracts to you? What if you genuinely expected that positive experiences would begin to occur? At least with more frequency? When you make a negative judgment about someone without having accurate knowledge about them, you set yourself up for negative expectations. And you get what you expect. The overall goal here is to have a healthy balance of both positive and negative expectation. That way you are balanced and not overly excessive in either direction. Because as we all know, life is challenging and will its have ups and downs.
