Just In case you ever need a reminder as to how much you love her take a second to read this letter to me. You love her because of the amazing person she is, this glowing aura she has around her that makes everyone instantly like her and warm up to her. That look she gives (you know the one) when she looks at you and you know shes saying in her head 'I Fucking Love You' but you're in the wrong type of surroundings to be saying that kind of stuff out loud. But still, you just know she saying exactly that in her head, because you are both on that same frequency. Every day giving up countless hours of social life just so i can see her face for a few hours after work, and then oversleeping because we would stay up most of the night Skyping. I'm not complaining, I would sacrifice every waking moment to see her if i could. How am i ever even supposed to say goodbye to her if it hurts me to even do it over Skype? I love All the things shes supports me with, even though most other humans would probably think im out of mind. Those Crystals she keeps with her safe for protection. Just because i asked her to. How she never ever judges me no matter what i say or do. In fact no matter how she never judges anyone ever, Because she do not have a single bad bone in her body. How she knows im always sick and time and time again she still fights for me and looks after me, even though she cant physically be here. How she dedicated hours on end researching cures for me. Her whole being overflows with all this love she need to give to the world. How can a person express so much love and still have so much more to give. How she lights up at just even seeing a picture of charlie or a cute little baby. How she is so delicate and gentle in her ways (But rough when she needs to be) Even how she endlessly fidgets, which just makes me want to wrap my body around her like a sloth. How she is always thinking about me, even after a fight and i don't deserve her attention. All the small little things she does to try and make my day. Spamming my phone with things for me to smile at after a long day at work. How i peddle my bike home as fast as i can to see her face before she has to leave for class. Our signature cuddle. Our last night together in Bristol. Our first night together in Baton Rouge on my birthday. No present could have ever beaten being able to hold her in my arms after months on end, trying to fight back the tears of how much i missed her. How i probably will cry a fucktonne more when i get to wrap my arms around her and kiss her in JFK. How we both automatically always wake up at various points in the night just to message each other. How when were together we barely even sleep, Because we don't want to miss a single moment with each other. How every single day is the hardest struggle, being able to see her through a screen but not be able to feel her or smell her. The nights when we both get in bed alone, longing for the other to be there. Just for a cuddle. Hotel after Hotel, Flight after Flight. Only ever arguing because we miss each other more than anything possible. Frustration builds up, Money holds us back, Secrets leave us guilty. But there is nothing in this world that would make me give her up. Nothing in this world that would ever keep me away from her. Nothing in this world that can possibly explain how much she means to me - how much i love her. All i ever ask of her is to never change, cause she does something to me...every single day that makes me want her that little bit more. she us not materialistic, but you know i would buy her the world. I've always been afraid of commitment but for her id get married right this instant. Every single year i have spent New Year with my family as tradition, this year is my first year to break it and be with my newest family (you). she'll be the first person i ever get to kiss at midnight when that ball drops on New Year.(who isnt a relation)she is my first ever real love and i couldn't ever go back to imagining life with out her. I don't know anything ever could be more painful than not being able to be with her. I love her and every little thing about her. And i thank god were not perfect cause how boring would that be. KRC you are everything to me.
