#n-wang

“This is your way to work things out now, Y/N?”, Mark finally said after being silent for almost half a minute. His voice is low. You felt that he was hurt from what you just said to him. But you just don’t feel anything right now. You felt numb.

He continued to talk with you in a calm voice, “I get it that you’re tired. But you’re not the only who feels exhausted in here, Y/N. It’s been almost two w-“

“Yes, Mark. Two. Fucking. Weeks.”, you cut him with a louder voice now. “What’s your plan?”

Mark responded with a silence. He’s sitting on the bedside with his hands on his head, facing the window while you sat on the other side of the bed facing the wall.

“I- I don’t know…”, he answered after being quiet for a few more seconds, taking a deep sigh.

You were waiting for him to talk, but you felt a sharp pain in your chest when you heard his response. Not expecting for him to be at lost now with your problem.

He wasn’t like this before. You think to yourself. Now you feel your eyes starting to water. You just want him to wrap his arms around you just like before, after you both had a fight. He always knows how to resolve things between the two of you. He always tries not to do or say anything that might upset or hurt you. And if he did, he always knows how to comfort you. For the four years, 10 months that you’ve been together, he always knows how to make you feel better.

But he isn’t like that anymore.

“I felt like this isn’t a home anymore, Y/N...”, Mark continued. “This... This whole situation. This whole set up. This doesn’t make me feel like home anymore.”

You felt a drop of tear fell on your cheek as he continued to speak. His words echoing in your mind sends air to your head. You wanted to shout. You wanted him to stop talking. Yet, you sat still on the bedside, freezing. His words just passed through your ears.

Another silent set of minutes passed after Mark talked. You tried to keep a steady voice before speaking.

“This isn’t going to work anymore if you felt that way, Mark…”,you said as another drop of tear fell down, and another, and another.

“I cannot force you to stay just because I want to. Tha- That’s not right.”, you continued to speak as you struggled to succumb to your sobbing.

“I still love you, Y/N…”, Mark responded with a low voice. You heard him sniff through his words. You close your eyes to stop yourself from crying harder, knowing that he’s already in tears too.

“I... I do. I still do love you, Y/N…”, he continued to talk.

“But it’s not enough for you to just feel that..."

You paused for a few more seconds, gathering all your thoughts.

"How about me, Mark? What would I do with your words if I can’t even feel it anymore?”, you spoke to him again, now staring at the floor. You’re thinking, how does him saying he loves you brings pain rather than happiness?

“I’m sorry, Y/N… I know I’m lacking these days. I’m failing to fulfill my promises to you. And I cannot stand to see you getting sadder and sadder each day because of me... I’m sorry…”

You don’t know how or what to respond to his words anymore. You hated to hear him saying sorry to you. You took a gulp to suppress the feeling of pain in your chest.

~

Your mind wandered around the time it all started. Mark was struggling to keep focus on his work as stress after stress took part of his job as the director of photography. There were much more projects than usual that was assigned to their production company. The conflict in the situation escalates more when one of their models backed out in the middle of their shooting. You’re just not sure if it was the model or the agency who pulled back. You cannot remember exactly Mark’s ranting on you that day. They already finished half of the set, shooting and editing for two days. They cannot hire another model that day because of their packed schedules which cannot be postponed or re-scheduled. That’s how they came up with the idea of choosing Mark as the substitute model since he already has a background when you were still studying. Mark is still kind of having second thoughts about it because he is aware of how it will add up on his already messed up work schedule, yet he chose to take a go for it because he said, he doesn’t have a choice though. Because it’s either he agreed on it or they will pull out the project and end up with no payment, in which they already had spent a big amount of money. The project came out more successfully than they could ever imagined, resulting to Mark being scouted as a model to some more projects. Tripling, even quadrupling his work in a regular basis.

You watched how Mark’s lifestyle changed over the past three months due to his work. Although you don’t have any problem with it, at first, aside from him not being able to go home regularly and not contacting you to at least let you know. You loved and supported him in every path he took.

A simple and common problem that almost each couple usually go through in their relationships. But that “simple and common” problem quickly arises when you tried to communicate with him about it. You don’t know what have gone wrong, or what did you told him so wrongly for him to change his habits in your relationship. That in the blink of an eye, you didn’t even notice that he just suddenly felt so far away from you. Catalyzing in a cleft in your almost five years relationship.

You tried to talk it out on him for some times. But you had your last straw almost two weeks ago when he suddenly snapped out of you.

“Y/N, can you please drop this out now. I’m already burned-out from working. Are you not getting tired from this? Because I am.”, cutting you and answering another phone call from his co-worker, before storming out of the living room, “Yes, Jae.”

You were left dumbfounded with his words. That moment did scarred you so bad. That’s for sure. You just don’t know him at all.

And that only proliferated the gap between the two of you. Taking you to the situation you are in now.

~

You’re now already bawling, trying to speak clearly as your breathing heaves, “I... I’m not happy with this anymore, Mark… I tried. I tried so hard. I tried so many times to reach out to you. To understand you. I feel like… I don’t even know you anymore…”

Y/N's P.O.V

It's 5 in the morning. Your alarm sets off. Just another normal working day, you think. You opened your eyes but didn't get up. You just stayed in your bed for a good 40 minutes. Laying on your back, you unconsciously fiddled your fingers at the big space beside you.

Thinking. Deep. Eventually losing yourself with the flashbacks in your mind.

You took a deep breath as you found yourself thinking about him again.

Thinking about how you used to wake up next to his pretty face as he snuggled you, showering you with sweet pecks all over your face, preventing you from getting up.

Playfully tickling your sides and you softly patting your hand to his cheeks to stop him.

His deep, soothing voice starting your day, “Good Morning, my angel”, smiling sweetly, as he rubs his tall, pointed nose to yours, always send butterflies to your stomach just by hearing his voice.

God, even his nose is just as fine as his whole being.

Thinking about how two were so happy before, the life you had with him for the past 4 years and 11 months. You both know, including every people around you, thinks that you are an absolute match for each other. You felt that no one and nothing will ever break you.

But with your current situation, you knock your self-thoughts. Leaving you always ending up in to thinking, how did it ever end up like this?

You lightly shook your head to clear out from all these thoughts taking over your mind. You suddenly look at your table side, glancing at the picture of the two of you that you still keep. Clicking your tongue and closing your eyes, you tell yourself, "Wake up now Y/N. That was 2 months ago.", as you take another deep sigh.

You got up from your bed. Walking towards the big stand mirror just beside your bathroom door to check your face and the bags under your eyes that you gained from all these sleepless nights, lightly tapping your face when you suddenly saw the familiar shirt on the floor. You're not even surprised anymore to find some of his left-over things in your apartment that you two used to share. You roll your eyes while shaking your head, "I'll have to clean this room eventually".

You recapture why you haven't even moved any of his things, not even an inch. You didn't even take a chance to pick up those random things he left.

Just once.

Just that one instant when you tried to clean your room from his belongings.

Right. Because when you did that, one week after he left, you didn't anticipate to have a severe breakdown. You are still afraid that you might helplessly bawl again in your bedroom floor just from the lingering scent he left. You remember that day so clearly. You didn't manage to get up from the floor. Didn’t touch any food. You just drank water. You didn't even shower. The definition of a complete disarray.

You're afraid to find yourself being a mess again from all the crying, from all the pain you felt you think that might not subside. Not even a little. You don't want to miss another day of work. Because the last time that occurred to you, you missed three consecutive days just to pick yourself up. If it wasn't for your best friend, Damica, you really thought you wouldn't have the strength to get up for the whole week or the next.

That's why you said to yourself, yes, it's a mess. But you chose not to gamble yourself for this again. You'll have to clean it up though one day. Just not today.

~

You were in a haze as you took your last 15 minutes break at work when you felt a light pat on your shoulder, distracting you from your wandering thoughts.

"Hey, Y/N. We're going to K-Town later to crash after work. You good?", Yugyeom said with a small smile and slightly raises his brows.

You paused to think for kind of long seconds.

Oh, right. K-Town.

Something that reminds you of Mark again.

You felt your chest ached a little bit more when you heard that place. A torture you always feel day by day.

You two would always go to K-Town every other week to spend your Friday nights after work to enjoy the start of your weekend together and of course, to release stress, just drinking and eating. Even if almost all of your friends have gone home, you and Mark would stay for some more time. Just talking about anything and everything. You two would sometimes come home at 2 in the morning. If you enjoyed the night so much, much later than that. After you got off the cab, he would sometimes drunkenly tell the driver, already eating some of his words, "Hey sir. Thank you for dropping me and my beautiful wife home safely.", as he tightly wrapped his arms around your waist, with his head leaning on your shoulder and plants a soft kiss on your neck.

You quickly blink to wake yourself up from the memories to respond, "Uhmm... I'll g–".

"Ow come on, Y/N. It's already Friday. It's been I-DON’T-KNOW HOW MANY WEEKS since you came with us.", Bambam cut you while kind of pouting as he felt that you might reject their invite again.

He is right though. You can't even remember anymore when was the last time you spent time with your friends. All that you can remember is how long you and Mark have called it off. But hey, you have to break yourself from these thoughts of Mark. You think to yourself.

"I was about to say I'll go when you cut me off Bam",you respond with a chuckle.

With your response, Yugyeom and Bambam was clearly surprised and hugged you tightly while screaming of excitement and happiness, sandwiching you between your two tall friends.

"YES!!! At last!!! She's herself again!!!", Bam said loudly as he was jumping. Not caring about your other workmates already looking at the three of you because of their noises. You just shut your eyes tightly and pursed your lips as you felt a little embarrassed, yet in a good, funny way.

"Yah yah yah! Get back to work. You still have an hour before you can leave.", the three of you were kind of startled with your boss' voice. Finally releasing you from their tight hugs.

"Ah, Sir Park! You have to come with us too later!",Yugyeom said to your boss as he playfully teased him by nudging his shoulder.

"Why? Are you going to treat us now?", Jinyoung replied, raising his eyebrows.

"Ah~ Stop it Jinyoung. Y/N's already coming with us. You should come too.", Yugyeom responded.

"Yah! This little pu– That's SIR PARK for you.", Jinyoung told Yugyeom as he jokingly attempted to hit him with his hand.

Looking at you now with Jinyoung's bit confused reaction, "You're really coming Y/N?"

"Yes, SIR Park.", you replied with a sweet smile. "That's why you should come too.", nudging at his arm with your elbow.

Jinyoung was one of Mark's college close friends. While Yugyeom and Bambam were one of the active members of the organization where Mark and Jinyoung are both officers. That's how you got close to them. Them, treating you like their sister, and you treating them as your brothers.

Yugyeom and Bam walked back to their working stations to finish the remaining hour of their work. Jinyoung walked back with you at your desk with his arms crossed to his chest, carefully analyzing your face.

"Are you sure you're okay now?",Jinyoung asked straight with a low, quieter voice so that only you can hear his kind of a personal question. "Let me just remind you that you can always file for a vacation leave, Y/N. Don't push yourself too much."

Your eyes opened slightly at his words. But you managed to compose yourself and put a still reaction. Just how you always react. Like nothing was wrong.

Blinking, you smiled at him, "Yes, Jinyoung. I am fine. Thank you for being such a considerate boss.", trying to put a light tone to every word you said to make the conversation less serious.

"I am not telling you this just because I am a considerate boss. I am still your friend, Y/N. Yugyeom, Bam and I.", Jinyoung replied to you.

You only answered him with a smile and nodded. Implicating that you acknowledged Jinyoung’s comforting words. Because you still don't know how to react or respond properly to your friends after checking up on you, after learning about how Mark and you suddenly broke up. Even you, yourself. You’re still dumbfounded at what happened to your almost-perfect relationship. You’re still at lost.

~

It's only 8 in the evening when your friends got high from drinking. You're only watching them while munching some fish cake at your table. Jinyoung, like the usual older brother to you, advised that you don't drink tonight and you just agreed. You just really didn't feel like drinking tonight. You only want to spend time with them after not being yourself for the past eight weeks. You're giggling at their weirder antics that shows up when they have alcohol in their systems. They just eccentrically yell something, sing some songs that you can’t even recognize if those songs really exist and dance that made you laugh even more.

"Yah! Jinyoung! How about you take off that padding cyclings!", Bambam yelled to Jinyoung as the surrounding's becoming louder, causing you all to crack at how shameless he is for bugging Jinyoung when he got kind of drunk.

"How about I break your chopstick legs, huh?!",glaring, Jinyoung retaliated, causing you to burst in to laughter again.

Your eyes were already tearing up from laughing when suddenly you heard a familiar laugh. You know that laugh too well. You felt a sudden cold chill in your spines. That soft laugh even though he's already laughing his lungs out. You force yourself not to think of him this time, but it's no use. You already know him like the back of your hand. And like a natural reflex, you looked for him. You start to find at who's laughing with that familiar voice. The laugh that you can listen to even though you're sleeping. You're already picturing his face. His perfect set of teeth. His cute canines. The laugh that you always love to hear. That voice.

You thought, Maybe he's here?

Obviously, he knows that you're always here every other week.

Maybe he came back.

You stood up from your seat and looked harder for whose laugh it belongs to. You rubbed your eyes and wiped your glasses at your shirt, squinting your eyes and extending your neck to look sharply. Scanning keenly the noisy surroundings, the people around you.

But he's nowhere to be seen.

There's no Mark here.

He is not here with you tonight.

He is not with you anymore.

You felt another known sharp sting in your chest.

And that pain you felt intensified when you heard Yugyeom tell you all in a loud voice, probably because of the drunken state he is now, “Whoa! Look at Mark hyung!”, holding his phone up, pointing at a posted photo of Mark on his Instagram that he uploaded a few minutes ago. You really tried not to look, but your eyes automatically glance at Yugyeom’s phone when you heard Mark’s name.

You bite your lip and swallowed to conceal your uneasiness and eagerness to see his face again. You felt your mouth dried when you saw his photo.

He became much, much, much more gorgeous than you could imagine.

You thought that he already has the most pretty face you’ve ever seen in your entire life.

Small face, high nose bridge, small alluring lips, his beautiful teeth that accentuates his whole features, and those doe eyes that brightens up his face when he smiles, your most favorite.

Just… his whole appearance is the vivid representation of an ethereal beauty.

Although it is a black and white photo, you can still see how much more gorgeous he has become. He’s now the cover model for a very well-known fashion and lifestyle magazine. He’s wearing a black leather beret and a black tank top, reflecting at a what you think is a window or something, flexing his side profile. A pure beauty. He really is made for this; you think to yourself.

You felt colder. Empty. You told yourself in a small voice, "...Manhattan must be really nice then."

So, here it is guys! My apologies for the late post 🙏🏼 But here it is anyways hehe. Thank you for those who are waiting and still want to read 😊

Also just a thought, I won't promise to put all GOT7 members in this AU unless they fit the characteristics I feel needed in this story.

I'll try to post the next chapter as soon as possible. Stay safe ya'll! -n. wang 💖

COVER, PROMPT

PROLOGUE

CHAPTER 2 (working in progress)

But, regardless of the amount of attractions he receives, he’s really a modest, quiet person who prefers his own company. Sometimes, with his really close friends. But mostly, he would just spend his time alone. That’s why when you started dating, most people around you were in awe.

You bring your free hand to brush his hair from his forehead then gently kisses it. He looks up to you then he put both of his hands to cup your face, bringing it closer to his. You’re now nose to nose with him.

He gazes into your eyes with his eyes glimmering, “So… Is that a yes? Because I’m still looking for a perfect ring to put on you.”

“Okay jokester.”, you chuckled at his words and tried to pull away from his intense gaze but he quickly turned your face to his again, with a little pout expressed on his cute lips, “But I’m really doing a canvass now…”

You felt his serious tone, although still looking cute with his little pout. You worried that he might sulk after your respond to him. Your brows furrowed, you asked him with a bit of confusion in your voice, “What? You’re serious Mark?”

He rapidly sat up beside you with his hands still cupping your face, slightly squeezing your cheeks, “Why would I joke about wanting to be with you, Y/N?”

You suddenly felt bad for thinking that he’s only trying to be funny. But with all those playful pranks and jokes he pulls on you with your 4 years of dating him, it was your turn to sulk at him. Yes, he’s quiet and kind of a reserved person. But with the right people, person, with you, he’s a whole lot different person. Not that different for you though. Maybe for other people. You see other colors of him that most people don’t.

Pouting slightly your lips, you lightly slap his arm, “Yah. You can’t blame me into thinking that. You always pull your jokes on me.”

“Well, can’t argue with you on that.”, he chuckled as he wiggled his brows. “I want to annoy you for the rest of my life though.”

You smiled at his response, slightly squinting your eyes and nodding as you agreed with him. With a tone of competitiveness, you responded, “Then, I’m not backing up on that, Mark Tuan.”

He cackled on your reply as he put his arm on your shoulder, pulling you closer to him, “You really don’t want to lose on me, huh? MRS. TUAN?”, putting emphasis on the name he just called you.

You hold his hand dragging over your shoulder while you lean on his. You breathe a smile at his words, “Mrs. Tuan, huh? I love to be called that in the future.”

With your answer, his lips contorted with another sweet smile, kissing your head, “I’ll take that as a yes then.”

~

“I felt like this isn’t a home anymore, Y/N...”, Mark continued. “This- This whole situation. This whole set up. This doesn’t make me feel like home anymore.”

You felt a drop of tear fell on your cheek as he continued to speak. His words echoing in your mind sends air to your head. You wanted to shout. You wanted him to stop talking. Yet, you sat still on the bedside, freezing. His words just passed through your ears.

Another silent set of minutes passed after Mark talked. You tried to keep a steady voice before speaking.

“This isn’t going to work anymore if you felt that way, Mark…”, you said as another drop of tear fell down, and another, and another.

“I cannot force you to stay just because I want to. Tha- That’s not right.”, you continued to speak as you struggled to succumb to your sobbing.

“I still love you, Y/N…”, Mark responded with a low voice. You heard him sniff through his words. You close your eyes to stop yourself from crying harder, knowing that he’s already in tears too.

“I-I do. I still do love you, Y/N…”, he continued to talk.

“But it’s not enough for you to just feel that... How about me, Mark? What would I do with your words if I can’t even feel it anymore?”, you answered to him, now staring at the floor. You’re thinking, how does him saying he loves you brings pain rather than happiness?

Chapter 1 to be posted soon. Thank you for reading! It means so much to me  💖  -n. wang

COVER, PROMPT

CHAPTER 1 (posted!)

CHAPTER 2 (working in progress)