#mywrok

LT TOUR: WEEK 4 

I miss CYRANO so much.I drew sketchs and made it into a booklet.

Bench project

Chinatown | San Francisco, California 

So the saying goes from a popular teenage book/movie that seems to be overused and make no sense to anyone. Just a jumble of words that sound nice and intelligent together and so we go around mindlessly repeating them. Yet if this so called saying is true, then maybe thats why I'm still loving you. You see I've thought about this for a while now and maybe I'm the confused one, that needs some more self worth.  If you can't maintain a relationship for over a month then there must be something wrong with you and I think I've cracked the code. I put up with your nonsense, your unfairness, your cruel and twisted mind, because I thought it was the best I could get. No, I don't need to reevaluate my self esteem, but my self worth.  I seem to be unaware of the cons of you and that the happiness you give me is filled with ploys that lead to depression, and if that isn't enough, you fail to care.  Why we all accept the love we think we deserve.  And if I imagined myself with better I would accept better. Maybe you would change your ways and mold us back into what we once wore, or maybe we would each find somebody new. And yes, even though I believe the love I have for you is just a figment of my imagination, even the small fragment of hope I have left is beneath me. My god I'm worth so much more, and I've been putting up with your bullshit for way too long seeing it as "progress" or "just the way boys act".  Everyone was right. Why do I put myself beneath the earth when I was meant to stand. I guess I never really comprehended what I am worth. Why did I fail to see this? And now I realize, we accept the love we think we deserve. But my dear, I deserve so much better and so do you; as the seasons change let our love blow away and find a new home. let us accept what we deserve.

When you are in love we all dream of that person loving us back. We dream of a relationship in which we never are faced with problems and not one gets in the way. You are infatuated with this person, dream of them, think of them, and beg for them to feel the same way. We often mention that we would be severly upset if they felt the opposite, but the real question is what is considerably the opposite? Would hate be the opposite of love? No. Hate is just as strong a feeling as love, and the tables can easily be turned.  If you hate someone your still infatuated with them, you care about their well-being (even if you want them to be sick, or upset), and take time out of your day to talk about them. But, indifference. Indifference is the plain old shoe in your tremendous closet. Indifference is that plain t- shirt you will find at the bottom of your drawer. Indifference could be that teddy bear you never cared for, or a lost memory at the bottom of a toy chest. At the end of the day what is worse? Being hated by the one you love, or not crossing the one that you love’s mind? Would you rather be that random text message that gets deleted after reading and they will “get back to later”, or the reason behind them staying up late and pondering the meaning behind the message. Consider this: The more you think about a person the more you become aware of someone. If you hate someone chances are you will spend so much time thinking about them that you will begin to find room for them in your heart. But indifference is one blood cell that didn’t make its way in, one person in the endless crowd of millions. You never care and you never will. At least with hate you care. You will always care.