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Hold onto your butts, I finished the Terrible OT3.
Just wanna say firstly, itâs not a happy and sunshine thing that they have going on, was never meant to be, hell the fact that two of the characters started as one fearing the other and the other despising them to a vague tolerance of each other due to both their mutual interest in the third character would be considered a hell of a bit of growth. Itâs a super unhealthy and dysfunctional thing they got going on here. But dear god was it a fun trash-fire.
Secondly, credit to @ifridiot and @ohnoagremlin for their characters and Golem AU.Â
This was fun, correct me where Iâm wrong or... do it as well.Â
Who hogs the duvet: Still Punchy a majority of the time.
Who texts/rings to check how their day is going: I would imagine that Shi and Skull may call or text to arrange plans and to check in, just as Shi and Punchy would do the same. Â But Punchy and Skull? Â Perhaps they would wind up with each otherâs numbers out of a cautious necessity, but certainly neither would be sending the other cutesy emojis or âThinking of youâ texts. Â ...maybe a âThinking about how much I canât stand your assâ, âMight not be able to stand my ass, but I can certainly stand yours if Iâm pegging tonightâ texts. Â
Itâs civil, but it still involves them scoring hits off each other. Â
Whoâs the most creative when it comes to gifts: They really donât do gifts, at least itâs not the showy call for attention sort of gift giving. Â It might just be, gonna leave this coffee blend on the counter. Â Your taste in alcohol is garbage - Iâm bringing something better tonight, you can keep drinking your crap or you can actually drink something that isnât also marketed as antiseptic. Â Hey, I picked up something for tonight, no, I did not keep it in the mortuary storage, stop insinuating I did. Â
Who gets up first in the morning: Shi. Â The unrepentant coffee making early-bird and dreaded opener of the blinds. Â Followed by a close lead of Punchy or Skull, all depending on factors such as - âBottler is already blowing up my phone and I need a shower because Iâm not going to work smelling like thisâ, how much hot water is left, and âYouâre comfortable and warm and Iâm willing to tolerate you doing that to my neck for maybe five more minutes - or until Shi attempts to get a picture of us cuddling again.â
Who suggests new things in bed: Itâs discussed in a warm non-judgemental and respectful - PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT - HAAAAA.  It gets brought up, maybe in a round-about way, maybe straight forward, but it gets brought up, if its not shot down and thereâs interest even if its scoffing interest, it is worth a shot to try.  If itâs not working, theyâre all very much comfortable saying its not working, just⊠without the eloquence. Â
Who cries at movies: There is no crying. Â There are only severe frowns and a general expression of upset - ALL OF YOU STOP INTERNALIZING YOUR FEELINGS, YOU ULCER-DEVELOPING FUCKS.
Who gives unprompted massages: Still Shi on that one. Â Though Punchy does that whole âIâm going to hold your hand and rub your knucklesâ thing regardless of who owns the hand, swat away still going to try again in five minutes, if itâs in reach itâs gonna get rubbed.
Who fusses over the other when theyâre sick:  Shi and Punchy vocally would worry and fuss over each other, Shi would fuss over Skull in that gruff âAs your doctor, yaâll being stupid, go lay downâ, Skull towards Shi more of a âLook at the trouble you got your stupid ass in while worrying about othersâ and might involve Punchy as the fuss-er, but otherwise considers Punchy a big girl who can worry about her own problems and doesnât need commentary about how to care for herself.   At most he might throw her a bottle of orange juice⊠pass the box of tissues, maybe order a pint of wonton soup to show up at her work. Â
Who gets jealous easiest:Â They might feel it from time to time, but no one is willing to admit. Â Punchy is the same as previous âThis is a good thing, Iâll enjoy it while it lasts, but when itâs done, itâs done.â
Who has the most embarrassing taste in music: Again, gotta admit, if you donât care what others think of your taste in music, suddenly being embarrassed doesnât matter.  That said⊠probably Shi.
Who collects something unusual: Everyone has something thatâs unusual to others, Shi and Skull seem to be mutually working on collecting bruises ...Punchy is apparently collecting âBad Taste in Menâ if weâre counting that one night involving Hare - wait⊠what was the question? Â
...owls. Â Punchy collects little owl figurines.
Who takes the longest to get ready: Tied between Shi and Punchy. Probably Punchy.
Who is the most tidy and organized: Skull. Â Hands down, the guy has his shit together - locked down tight with no signs of budging. Â He makes rumpled still look put-together. Â He is a man with a plan for his plan. Â Punchy might have a militant background, place for everything and everything in its place - so best not be disturbing my shit, but sheâs got nothing on Mr. Never Ruffled. Â Shi might be medically meticulous, but has a fondness to relaxing and being casual in the personal aspects - but Skull? Â The man has life in a fucking choke-hold and is ready to bear down if it so much as twitches out of line.
Who gets most excited about the holidays: Who wore a santa hat THAT ONE GODDAMN TIME⊠nah, Punchy likes holidays when itâs not related to Bottlerâs âtrot out in front of shareholders and government contractors to blow smoke up their assesâ thing.
Who is the big spoon/little spoon: Â Shi is still the Lil Spoon. Â Skull is the middle of the ice-cream sandwich. Â Because heâs a cold fuckin bastard with a sweetheart on either side.
Who gets most competitive when playing games and/or sports: Some games have been outright banned due to the level of aggression shown by Punchy and Skull. Â Monopoly for one, still trying to find a sport that both of them can hold a mutual outrage towards.
Who starts the most arguments: Thatâs a tie. Â They all need to practice âreasonable adults having a conversation that does not generally include slurs about mothers and or creatorsâ
Who suggests that they buy a pet: No one. Â
What couple traditions they have: Bad day for you? Â Yeah, bad day for me too. Â Meet up and we all get it out of our systems - see you tonight. Â
What tv shows they watch together: Movie night occasionally is pick from a hat - goddamn it, itâs a rom-com, why the hell are these in here? Why do you have these Meg Ryan movies?? Sometimes itâs just watch whatever is on, even if itâs settling on a documentary and using it as background noise.
What other couple they hang out with: ...Does Jack Daniels and Jimmy Beam count as a couple?  Theyâre not really a âhang-out with others as a coupleâ sort of folk, itâd be a very rare thing to see all three sharing the same space in public.  Better chance as a pair. Maybe a âFancy meeting you, lets go for a walk - yes, heâs tailing us.â Could happen, but donât hold your breath. Â
How they spend time together as a couple: Movie watching, take-out nights, sitting down and figuring out tax forms. Â Bitching about the news. Â Bitching about politics. Â Coming to near blows over board games. Â
Who made the first move: None of your business.
Who brings flowers home: No. Â No flowers. Â Maybe Punchy giving them both a christmas cactus. Â It reflects your nature. Â Yer both pricks. Â
Who is the best cook: At least this incarnation Shiâs cooking is not a OSHA violation, that alone is a small mercy.