#moriskous

… and further will I remain undisturbed. I couldn't do a better job myself. Once a month I imagine all human beings with a gun barrel between their lips, they will only babble as soon as they watch their lives vanishing. We all are the same, same blood color, same suicidal-critical moments, same race, or that’s what I remember you said last night on my bed.

Get closer, bae.

Well, People tend to congregate when they start discussing about sexual orientation, indigenous’ massacres, human slaughtering, kamikazes, … , but we all know that at the end nobody gives a damn, not even about themselves. Let me tell you a fun fact, just at the moment that there's sleep deprivation on someone's life, everything starts to be seen as real, real as a film. That’s why we never realize that we've been the winning-award directors of our own lives the whole time because we never sleep. We’re excessively busy thinking about getting a job, having the perfect couple, wearing some Carats, being spiritually and mentally stable, carrying a Pomeranian. So let me tell you for the record, that we're not our fancy pants, our Stuart Weitzman shoes, our Yamamoto shirts, nor a propaganda's exemplification. We are a cumulus of experiences that molden our thinking structures through time, and that’s why we gotta do what’s best for our well-being after we gathered all the necessary information for our existence.

Hey! You know I’ll fall for your caresses. Stop it, I’m philosophizing.

Then, let’s continue. I think love is worth saving. You remember that time we had sex at my nanny’s home, and afterward you try to commit suicide because you had a depressive crisis. Remember I changed your mind by telling you how much I love you, and how you would've ruin my life if you die because I will never find someone like you, so sweet, passionate, smart, fearless, loyal, and hilarious. Thereafter, everything made more sense to me when I started to bawl and you stopped what you were trying to do, just to take me between your arms and whisper me that you love me so much that you’ll never leave me alone. Immediately, I comprehended that It was only a scream-for-help kind of act because your parents were divorcing, and you didn’t want to move with your mom and her new girlfriend to Aberdeen. What a day we lived on our anniversary! Don’t worry, I know it won't happen again. 

(Such a lie, she thought). I won’t recall it anew, my puddin’.

And where was I? Right, the outcome of depression as a result of our incompetence is ruling and molding us into puppets of the market. Everybody knows it but who cares? I’m not the new Gandhi, neither a spiritual guider, I’m just a girl expressing what others are afraid or too busy to say. They just want you to be docile, fragile, scared, so they can shape you. But I’m not telling to go out and beat the hell out of your bullies. No! I’m just trying to instruct that you should come out of your catatonic state and be brave. This is a woman’s world and we would be nothing on the absence of our daring Valkyries. Strong women ready to speak up and establish the status quo in our civilization, where decisions are made of needed feelings. Wow! From time to time, I put on practice what I learned in my debate club.

Now, let’s lose ourselves in complete oblivion. I want you to kiss me ‘till the end of our periods while my fingers penetrate you, my cutie pie.

But first, let me ask my readers, are you really living it? Or just bearing it? Is it working for you, to be ingenious? Is it worth being owned by your greedy surroundings? If not, stop the stupidity about keeping your senseless stubbornness and, the idea of breathing and thinking correctly, that's already part of your human nature. What you got to do is...

Do you know how far we've come since the stone age? New analyses showed that even if the planet destruction were to end now, it would take 4-6 million years for the world to recover. Maybe, this is why we keep getting unhealthy, just because it’ll never happen.

My name is Tulip. I was born sick, but I love it. I have a tumor in my brain, which isn’t operable. I wonder whether I’ll actually survive or not. I had removed as much of the redundancy and academic flourish learned at the university, so I could start living a new life, a life without too many snags and hypocrisies. Now, everything is less pretentious, but more scintillating and colorful. Damn it! My body is already feeling her cold blade lacerating my flesh while her hand rests over my shoulder to ease my spiritual glooming.

Yesterday, my mom found me bawling in the attic next to a dead butterfly and she told me that I needn’t worry about those things, and promptly I’ll get a second chance to live “normally”. I’m wary of what may happen to my existence if the tumor gets worse and starts its aggressive feeding. Then, I voted to stop giving it too much attention to the idea to avoid completely losing my mind. Although, this will always be a suggested idea to control the fear of dying and disappearing for the rest of my prosaic animation, I know that I adore following the opposites. Signs of unwelcome emotions taking over my soul and seizing all my weaknesses to sabotage, once and for all, each of my efforts to adjust the old shibboleths about the human path to perfection.

Every time someone discovers the key to conclude the massive human destruction, it’s when life takes responsibility and decides to execute the expert no matter the world’s crisis, that’s the least they care about. Their only concern is to have power or authority over nature, the uncontrollable, life itself. Self-chosen impostors, Bloody hell! I’m fading away, word by word, second to second.

Con esta misiva te quiero expresar mi profundo cariño por tu bello y efusivo espíritu. Ya que con el solo hecho de leerte, uno se prepara para tener un encuentro puro y verdadero con un individuo lleno de amor, pero con un sin número de experiencias que lo han fortalecido y convertido en un guerrero de las dificultades que esta sociedad moderna genera, procesa y duplica.

Le doy gracias a Moriskous por haberte dado la oportunidad de crecer en medio de la hermosura, dulzura, y fuerte carácter del imperio de lo mundano, ya que con esto aprendiste a robustecer tu persona para vivir con las dificultades de la gente hipócrita y las incertidumbres del inefable destino. También agradezco que te hayan dado esa resiliencia (siempre sonó bonito, por eso la use porque todo el mundo la usa) emocional con la cual has logrado desglosar, ordenar y construir un mundo propio, digno del mejor postor de blackjack luego de haber olvidado su máscara habitual. Tus heridas son los suficientemente versátil para comprender que en ellas el amor propio a penetrado para atestar cada espacio desolado e incomprendido con un amplio espectro de reconocimiento espacial (se que entiendes a qué me refiero). Tu personalidad sobresaldrá en cada instante que el odio, la errónea incitación y, lo nefasto atropellen un espacio en el que te encuentres; así lo quiere la vida y por simple deducción lógica este hecho previamente escrito será una certeza divina por el resto de las nuestras, siempre recuerda esto por favor. 

Todo estará de la mano de tus acciones, y como impredecibles estas son, de igual forma se reflejarán en tu vida, creo que tienes un futuro orótico, es decir, lleno de oro y belleza. Espero nunca dejes de disfrutar de tu jovialidad para que siempre seas luz y esperanza de muchos para aquello que no se atreven a arriesgarse. El mundo cada vez está más lleno de incomprendidos y frikis, espero seas de los “buenos”.

Ojala hayas disfrutado el retiro en la comunidad de los enmascarados, porque para saber tanto de ellos, seguro es que eres un miembro. Lo siento, ¿será?