#moonfaery

Looking after a child was never going to be easy, let alone a child that had lost their mother at such a young age.

Your heart went out to Legolas – he was only small and would grow up with very few memories of his mother, only what had been painted of her before she got ill.

Of course, your heart went out to Thranduil also as he had lost a wife as well as his queen.

He never showed that it hurt, rather distancing himself from everything else but you could only hope that he’d soon return to the caring father and king that he had been in the past.

With you having known Thranduil from when you were both young, he had given you the job of being Legolas’ nanny after his mother’s passing.

And so, you became Legolas’ new best friend; a job that you utterly adored.

Whilst you had been rocking Legolas to sleep you had sung him a lullaby that your mother always used to sing you, even once he was asleep you continued to sing.

Walking around the room with him in your arms, you sang to him in your mother tongue.

“My mother sang that to me also,” a voice spoke up from the doorway causing you to jump.

You turned to see Thranduil stood in the doorway of Legolas’ nursey with a ghost of a smile on his face.

Gently, you placed Legolas down in his bed before turning back to Thranduil.

“You weren’t supposed to hear that,” you told him quietly as the two of you went to the balcony of his room.

He chuckled lowly. “Why not Y/N?”

“I don’t suppose that my singing voice is the most pleasurable your highness,” you stated matter of factly.

He sighed. “You do not need to address me as such Y/N, you are aware of this.”

“You are still my king,” you said in your defence.

He nodded in agreement. “Yes, but I am also your friend.”

“The only one you trust with your son it seems.”

Thranduil turned to look into the room, smiling fondly at his son. “I am unsure how I am going to do it without her.”

Sighing, you placed your hand on his arm. “You won’t be doing it alone.”

“She left me alone.”

Shaking your head, you moved his face so that he was looking down at you. “She did not leave her son of her own accord nor did she leave her husband of her own accord either,” you stated firmly. “You lost your wife, Legolas lost his mother and the people lost their beloved queen,”

Thranduil said nothing as he listened to you.

“We all lost here Thranduil, and we are all still grieving,” you whispered as he reached out to grip your hand. “None of your people expect you to not to grieve.”

“Grieving is weakness Y/N and we do not need weakness in our realm.”

You sighed again, stepping away from Thranduil but he grabbed your wrist before you could go back into the room.

“I am lost without her,” he admitted softly as he stared out over the land. “I feel as if there is no moving on from this.”

Thranduil allowed you to pull him into a hug. “The pain will cease in time your highness,” you whispered into his ear as you went up onto your tiptoes. “And until then, you have those who you can lean on.”

“I only want you,” he whispered in return whilst looking into your eyes.

This was taking forever and you have already grew tired and sick of sitting in one place for fifth hour, with no prospect of leaving any time soon.

You were aware that negotiations between three races would not be easy but that hard? All three of them must be so stubborn and won’t even consider a little compromise?

You heave out a sight and it catches Thorin’s attention.

“Y/N? Are we boring you?” he cocks up his brow, looking at you with scolding expression on his face.

Thranduil leans in his chair and purses his lips whilst Bard rests his chin on his palm, both of them fixating their gazes at you. You can have their respect but they will not let you disregard such important matter as trading terms.

“Your Majesties, I do realize that all three of you would want to have the best possible solution for them but given that it is a benefit to all of you I suggest working out a compromise. Something that will satisfy all of you.”

“That’s impossible,” Thranduil notes in a low, cold tone and you fight an urge to grunt. Elves and their pride.

“It would be, if you stopped putting yourself and your people first. Y/N is right, we need to somehow meet in the middle,” Bard says calmly but sternly and Thranduil huffs.

“I can’t imagine any possible solution that would be best for all of us. Not when Thranduil doesn’t want to involve his people!” Thorin protests and you start massaging your forehead. You sense a huge headache coming, as usual when you help in negotiations.

It started when you joined Thorin and the Dwarves on their quest to Erebor. When you were captured by Woodland elves you somehow managed to convince Thranduil to let you all go. For some reason, he agreed and Thorin immediately proposed you a position of his personal negotiator.

Sometimes you regretted that you took it.

“May I?” you ask looking at Thorin and he nods his head wordlessly.

“I suggest that, given that King Thranduil doesn’t wish his lands to be disturbed, the elves would only help with transferring the supplies from boats to carts. This way it will go quicker because the elves are stronger.”

Thranduil furrows his brows, gazing at you intensely and for a moment you feel very uncomfortable.

He stays like that for a long while, visibly analyzing your proposition and when he finally snaps out of it, you exhale and relax.

“Agreed. We can arrange that.”

______

You drag yourself to your quarters feeling mighty exhausted. It was never easy but lately, as Thranduil mostly demanded rarely offering something in exchange, the negotiations became harder and more demanding.    

It didn’t help your very recent marriage.

Kili and you became close during the quest but only after the Mountain was reclaimed you decided to make you relationship official. As his mother and your parents arrived you announced your courtship and not long after you were married.

And even though you loved your work and usually it didn’t take such a toll on you, you wanted to spend more time with your husband and celebrate your relationship instead of sitting with three kings during boring talks.

Yet, no reasoning broke through to Thorin, even when his sister yelled at him. You were needed, period, and he couldn’t give you less responsibilities than you position required. And, after all, you agreed to take that position.

Which, lately, you started regretting more and more.

As you open the door, Kili rushes to you, his arms embracing you in no time.

“Another rough one, eh?” he asks quietly and you can only nod, too tired to even speak.

“Want me to draw you a bath?”

“Only if you join me, love,” you say with a soft smile and Kili’s face breaks into a puppy-like happy grin.

“Well, I was counting on that, sweetheart. Give me a minute and it’ll be ready.”

“I’ll undress in the meantime,” you announce and Kili nods before heading to adjacent bathroom.

And even though he didn’t let anything show, he was worried sick about you. You barely had time for yourself, not to mention for him and your marriage. It wasn’t how he imagined it to be. And even though he understood the nature of your job and how important it was he couldn’t help but wonder if Thorin realized that you had first and foremost you were Kili’s wife.

And that was what matter the most. Not some stupid negotiations.  And Kili felt like it was high time to take the matters into his own hands.

_____

The next day you wake up quite late, but luckily you don’t have to work until afternoon. Today you have scheduled only one negotiations – with King Thranduil, concerning the terms of forestry and possible hunting.

Kili was gone when you woke up and you guess he went to his own duties. Neither of you was actually free of work, both of you had obligations.  

You go about your daily routine, washing up, styling your hair and choosing a proper dress. It seems to be easy but in fact you need to kind of mix the cultures of the kings you’ll be seeing today – you can’t look too dwarvish, but not too elvish either.

After you deem yourself decent enough to attempt the meeting, you eat a small meal, and head to the conference room.

As you open the door, much to your surprise you see Kili, chatting with Thorin.

“Kili?” you mumble as you near them, Kili looking at you with innocent expression and you instantly become suspicious.

“Y/N! I brought wine for the meeting – Bombur didn’t have anybody around to send here and I was near. What a coincidence, don’t you think?”

You narrow your eyes but sit down although feeling rather uneasy. It surely was not a coincidence.  

“Yes, a coincidence.”

“Do you want some wine, love?”

“No, I’m fine. When will Tranduil arrive?”

“Soon,” Throin answers simply, accepting a full glass of wine Kili hands him. As you see Kili’s self-satisfied smirk your stomach drops. What is going on?

“Thorin…” you mutter, drawing his attention. The glass stops mid-way to his mouth.

“Yes?”

“Don’t drink it.”

“Why not?” he knits his brow, looking at you confused. Kili freezes behind Thorin’s back, gazing at you with wide open eyes.

You got him.

“I have a suspicion that Kili might have added something to the wine. Am I right?”

Kili fidgets and Thorin glances at him with stern expression.

“Kili?”

“Well, uh… I might have asked Oin for a medicine for my feigned gastric problems…”

“Kili, for Mahal’s sake, why would you do that?” Thorin huffs out, putting the glass on the table and sliding it away from himself.

“Because you won’t let Y/N rest! You keep her here all day long and she’s always tired! And we’re married! How can I spend time with my wife while she’s always away from me?!”

“Oh, Kili…” you mumble, shaking your head. His behavior has undoubtedly childish and reckless but somewhat adorable.

“Y/N, is it true? Am I tiring you too much?”

You clear your throat.

“To be frank, even though I love my job, there are some cases when I am not needed. I do feel that you, Thranduil and Bard sometimes rely on me too much. You are all clever enough to find a solution by yourselves,” you admit quietly, a little anxious as to what Thorin’s reaction would be. Will he be angry? Disappointed?  

Thorin heaves out a sigh as he looks at you. There’s no anger in his gaze, just compassion and what seems to be apology.

“I am sorry, Y/N. It became very easy to not have to think too much while having you beside me. And you’re right, we rely on you too much. Therefore,” he pauses and smiles at you, “you have two weeks off. Starting now.”

“Kili, take Y/N somewhere nice. Consider it as a kind of honeymoon.”

You sit dumbfounded, not really registering what have just happened, Kili on the other hand immediately starts cheering, even hugging Thorin.

Soon, you start cheering too, thanking Thorin profusely and he ushers you away before Thranduil arrives. Kili and you walk out of the conference room, rushing to your chambers.

“I should be very mad at you.”

“I know, Y/N.”

“But I will yell at you later. Now, I assume you already planned a journey of sorts?”

“Ah, you know me so well!”

“Do we start packing?”

“Of course.”

You clap your hands, quickening your pace and Kili giggles, seeing your enthusiasm.