Imagine The Banana Splits being interviewed on "Monitor" back in the day--
(For the unaware, the Monitor referred to here was NBC Radio's legendary weekend anthology radio show as aired from 1955 to 1975, featuring a mix of hourly news bulletins, weather and sport updates, light comedy and musical features and all manner of remote pickups, consistent with the show's premise of "going places and doing things" every weekend ... all because, to use a popular slogan for the show, "weekends are different--so is 'Monitor.'"
(For the sake of this particular piece, we picture this otherwise unlikely interview, via the Monitor Open Line--long used for telephone interviews with newsmakers and field correspondents--being done during its Saturday-afternoon segment between 3 and 6 pm [Eastern time], and perhaps being sometime in 1970, shortly after "The Banana Splits Adventure Hour" was cancelled from the Saturday-morning lineup at NBC Television; hence, Joe Garagiola would have been the Monitor host and, in this case, the interviewer.
(We find the whole opening with the Monitor Beacon, its storied audio signal, coming out of break when--)
JOE GARAGIOLA: It's Saturday-afternoon Monitor here on NBC ... and it's come to our attention where that lovably silly Saturday-morning musical quartet known as The Banana Splits, as in Bingo, Drooper, Fleegle and Snorky, will be taking a short respite before going back to touring, what with their NBC Television show having been cancelled after two seasons on Saturday morning. And with that in mind, we were able to catch up with the four at a truck strop somewhere in Wisconsin via the Monitor Open Line ... so, come in, Banana Splits--
[Brief pause to maximise the comic effect]
JG, after a few moments: Are you still there, Banana Splits?!
FLEEGLE, with inherent surprise: Uh, I should admit that you caught us by surprise, and then some! We're waiting for a diner table when the call came in, and besides--
JG: So I take it you're the leader of The Banana Splits, Fleegle--
FLEEGLE: And you are right, sir!
JG: So what exactly is the motivation behind your taking some rest after two seasons on Saturday morning television?
DROOPER, trying to stay rational: After we got word the other day that our television presence would be ending with the new fall season, I have to admit we were at a loss for where to go next, especially absent any concert appearences at cheesy amusement parks on tour.
SNORKY: [Incessant honking]
DROOPER: I happen to interpret for Snorky, and he was just remarking there something to the effect of "ain't it a shame."
JG: But still, with two seasons of Saturday-morning television under your belts, as well as a modestly-successful record deal, didn't it seem rather obvious that you may have needed a break to begin with?
FLEEGLE: Still, when you've been taping new shows almost every week for two years now, when you're still trying to come up with fresh and fascinating material, both musically and comedically, you get to realise there's a point where things need to change.
JG: I can assume you must have received a lot of fan mail all this time, much of which was shared on the air in a rather memorable segment.
DROOPER: How true. But did you know such started out as a pastiche of advice columnists, which I happened to handle?
JG: I think I'm forgetting about that; I believe it was called "Dear Drooper," wasn't it?
BINGO, getting his turn in for once: That's correct. I myself shared the letters with Drooper, and he tried to come up with some rather snappy answers like you wouldn't believe!
FLEEGLE, aside: Or attempted to believe! [Laughter]
JG: At any rate, then, now that you're off the air basically, could we have some details as to where you'd be getting this rest?
BINGO: Out of concern for our privacy, all that I can say here, for and on behalf of the Splits, is that it'll be somewhere up in northern Wisconsin, up in the resort country.
FLEEGLE: Probably close to Hayward, to be specific about it. That's about all I can say to the moment.
SNORKY: [Incessant honking]
DROOPER, interpreting for Snorky: We're certainly hoping for plenty of swimming and fishing while there!
JG: Which, at any rate, I think you certainly deserve!
BINGO: As if that weren't crazy enough, we're going to try out skin diving while we're on our break! And won't it be an experience in itself, seeing what things must be like underwater--
FLEEGLE, adding his bit to the conversation: And for the sheer experience of actually going underwater!
SNORKY: [Incessant honking]
DROOPER: Even Snorky's excited about the prospect!
JG: Well, at any rate, I wish all of you as much a rather pleasant rest as good luck in whatever may be coming your way next...
FLEEGLE: And thank you for managing to find us for the sake of this interview!
ALL THE SPLITS: [Ad-libbed thanks and farewells]
JG: Anyway, that was The Banana Splits there from a truck stop we can only explain for the moment to be somewhere in Wisconsin, heading up somewhere in Wisconsin itself for some much-deserved rest after two years on air. 26 past the hour now, and you're on the Monitor Beacon ...
(The aforesaid Beacon comes up, signalling a programme break)
