#miloria

A few nights before, Astoria had noticed a sketch on the opposite page of his notebook when they were cleaning up after dinner - a common tradeoff, given they were almost entirely useless in the kitchen when it came to actually making meals - and stopped mid reach for an empty glass near his arm, turning their head slightly to get a better look. The canine faces were easily recognizable: Nathaira’s head under Ursula’s as they dozed, and the tip of the former’s tongue sticking out in an expression Milenko called her “mlem”. 

“When did you put the pups into your notebook?”

“A couple of days ago.” He mused, punctuating the sentence he was writing before he looked up. “I was trying to write, but I saw them sleeping like that and I had the paper handy.”

“First of all, it’s quite good, and I’ll probably cry over it later. However, a more pressing question - how did I not know that you draw?” They asked, and Milenko had laughed, setting his pen aside and idly messing with the corner of the page in question. 

“Thank you. To be fair to you, it just didn’t come to mind as something to point out. I’ve never been so invested as, say, your grandmother, but I like to draw whatever catches my eye.” He flipped towards the back of his notebook, offering it to them once he’d found a few particular pages. “I never do much more than a sketch, but you’re still welcome to look.”

Astoria carefully set the glasses in hand down again, making sure their hands were dry before they accepted the notebook, one arm falling around Milenko’s shoulders as his own settled around their hips. 

The first one was quickly recognizable: a sketch of Octavia, leaning against the counter of the Sphinx, chin in one hand and pen in the other. Astoria could only assume she was working on her play in that moment between customers, a few stray waves of hair free of her typical updo. The page opposite had sketches of orchids in bloom, sharing the space with a pattern of lace - the silhouettes of creeping vines, flowers, and a few butterflies, a pattern Astoria recognized as one on a pair of gloves they had worn on several occasions. 

“These are all lovely, Milenko.” They said, smiling as they turned the page, spotting a few more details they themself had seen before - Ursula sprawled out to doze with a ball in her mouth, part of the winter garden at the Palazzo - before handing his notebook back to him with a playful smile. “Much better than the stick up the arse art I grew up around. I like the personal touches.”

Milenko laughed, squeezing their hip with one hand as he set his notebook aside. 

“I thought nobility made a sport out of getting portraits done?” He teased, and Astoria snorted, playfully swatting at his hand and picking up the glasses again to finish the last of the washing up. Milenko followed, despite Astoria trying to wave him off, picking up the dish towel to dry as Astoria scrubbed each of their cups. 

“Not all families do, but my mother still made a fuss of it. I had to get one done every year as soon as I was old enough to sit still. Mother had an artist on retainer for all of us - Mungo Drummond, that’s what his name was. He was ancient when I was a child and always smelled oddly like salted ham and stale bread. None of us liked him.”

“Except your mother, I’m sure.” 

“Oh, mother absolutely adored him. Sachairi and I always thought he was a pretentious twat. Never quite got my nose right, but Myrna made it a sport to piss him off and correct his paintings after he left.” Astoria laughed, settling their hands on his shoulders and giving him a cheeky look. “Though I suppose I would have been much more agreeable to portraits if it were you painting them, handsome as you are. I’d have sat in that room for hours, floundering endlessly trying to find a way to ask you to the Hogmanay party when the time came.”

“That sounds like the plot of one of your romances.” Milenko laughed as they put the last of the dishes away. “Something like ‘The Heir and the Painter’. With one of those incredibly dramatic covers, where both parties have long flowing hair and one of us is topless while wearing a kilt.”

“I do hope that would be me in the kilt, though you would look good in my colors. I just think I’d wear it better.” Astoria grinned as Milenko laughed, shaking his head a little as he put the kettle on for them and pulled out one of their teacups. 

“I think I’d look gorgeous in one of those long gowns like the ones you have in your closet.” Once the flame was going, Milenko turned to give them a kiss, amusement clear on his face. “Those puffy sleeves and high waists would flatter me.”

“Throw in an abundance of pastels in the background, and suddenly that book is living in the box under the bed.” Astoria laughed, wrapping their arms around his waist and smiling when his came around their shoulders in a warm embrace, and his face pressed into the curve of their neck. “If you’re ever feeling indulgent, we could always mock up a scene from that hypothetical book. I’m sure the dramatic scene in which they finally give into their attraction to one another despite keeping careful distance is in some way done via a portrait drawing.”

They felt Milenko’s laughter in his chest and smiled, turning to kiss his cheek when he lifted his head to look at them. 

“I have no plans for tomorrow night.” He mused, playfully raising a brow. “Should I bring my paper and pencils?”

An idea sparked then, one uncharacteristically bold for Astoria but one they could not shake, and they hummed a little in contemplation. 

“Well, you enjoy drawing people, from what I saw. The little I know of artists is that there’s always some sort of anatomical study. Perhaps I can pose for you.”

Milenko paused then, leaning back to watch their face a little better but not quite letting them go. 

“Correct me if I’m wrong, beloved, but that didn’t quite sound like a joke.”

“That was the intention, as it was a genuine offer. It’s not like we’re strangers to nudity, Milenko, nor engaging in each other’s bodies. There is no obligation, but should you ever decide you’d like to, the offer is open and on the table. I’ve certainly never posed before, but the study of anatomy is a concept I am more than familiar with even if in a different way, and I would not mind participating. And if it leads elsewhere…well, I certainly wouldn’t be opposed, either.”

Astoria watched with some amusement as Milenko seemed to weigh that, taking a few moments to contemplate what they’d said - which Astoria truthfully preferred to a rushed decision - before he nodded, kissing their brow lightly. 

“Not tonight. Though I would enjoy doing that with you, Astoria, and I would like to. How about we plan for the end of the week, when you don’t have any work plans to worry over? Then we can see where things go from there without needing to rush.”

“That sounds perfect.” Astoria leaned up to press a quick kiss to his cheek, mind already moving on to the next order of business as the kettle whistled. “Now, would you like to have a cup of tea with me? I bought a new blend at the market today.”

*     *     *     *     *

Astoria, in many other contexts, knew they likely never would have had the courage to ask such a thing. But Milenko had seen them bare before, just as they had seen him, on many nights following that discussion of intimacy when both of them shared in pleasure with the other. They themself still had their limits, though those too were quickly evaporating, and Milenko had been more than willing to respect those boundaries. 

Each time they came together, especially recently, Astoria found themself wanting more. It had evolved from use of their hands to their mouths - Astoria had particularly found their mind wandering toward the thought of the time Milenko had pulled them to straddle his face, his arms wrapped around their thighs, or the time they’d had him bent over the edge of the bed with soft kisses making a path down his back until they reached where they wanted to be - but they wanted to fill in more of the blanks of what they’d experienced but never with Milenko. 

So there they stood, only a few days later, watching with a smile and cheeks a little warm as Milenko settled on a place for his chair and immediately started rearranging things on the couch. 

“If you’re so keen on rearranging the living room, let me put proper clothes on.” Astoria mused with a small laugh, twirling the tie to their robe in loose circles. “I’ll sweep under the couch before you lose steam. Who knows how much dog hair is probably under that thing.” 

Milenko let out a laugh of his own, stepping away from the chair to extend a hand to them, and Astoria smiled when he pressed a kiss to the corner of their mouth. 

“Tempting offer, truly. I’d be afraid we’re growing a third dog under there. It’s been a while.”

“If nothing else, when the fur starts flying, you can tell people you’ve finally made the leap to wearing colors.”

He laughed again before Astoria leaned up, smiling into the kiss they shared - one they intended to be chaste, but quickly melted into something a little more heated before they managed to find it in themself to pull back, a hand resting lightly against his chest as they did. 

“Right.” They cleared their throat, cheeks warming lightly as Milenko lifted their hand to his lips and lightly kissed their fingertips, holding their gaze all the while. “Tell you how you want me, my love? I trust your creative eye.”

The double entendre had been purposeful. They had entered the room with a sense of self-assurance, a sense of confidence that came from knowing exactly what they wanted and wanting to make that clear, but something about Milenko - something about the way he looked at them when they’d said it, when they knew he’d noticed - made them the sheer physical impossibility of feeling so melty all the way down to their toes. 

Eventually he nodded toward the couch, releasing them so they could walk unhindered. “Whatever makes you feel most comfortable. Can I get you anything to help you settle?”

“I meant to make a cup of tea before I sat, but I got sidetracked…” They said, hardly finishing the thought before Milenko was already making his way toward the kitchen. 

“Which one?”

“The one with the cinnamon and vanilla - oh, just the jar with bread pudding written on the top. It’s with all the other teas. You’ll see what I mean. I swear I’m not losing my mind, it just tastes like bread pudding to me.”

“I’ll take your word for it.” They heard him call, a slight chuckle in his voice, then a soft “huh” as they heard the jar open, assuming he’d taken a whiff of it out of curiosity. 

Astoria would make their way to the couch, picking apart the knot of their dressing gown and letting it slip smoothly off their shoulders - black fabric and lace pooling neatly around their feet before they draped it over the arm of the couch. To sit upon it in their bare skin was a new sensation, but not unpleasant, as the tufted velvet was soft and not at all scratchy, and they smiled a little as they settled in and rearranged the throw pillows to prop a few up against their back. 

By the time Milenko had returned, Astoria had decided how they would sit - back against the corner of the couch, left elbow propped on the arm with their hand relaxed, right draped loosely along the back of the couch, right leg stretched out and the left slightly bent with their knee propped lightly upon a throw pillow. They sat up when he stepped into the room, smiling as he set the steaming cup carefully into their outstretched hand with a cautionary warning of its temperature. 

“Well, you certainly didn’t waste any time.” He teased, his eyes flickering down towards the twin dove tattoos at their knees, then back up as Astoria snorted and playfully raised a brow at him.

“If that’s a complaint, I can just put my dressing gown back on…”

They leaned down as if to grab the garment from where it had fallen, but Milenko slipped his foot under it and kicked it away, putting on an innocent sort of smile when Astoria barked a laugh that forced them to set down their tea for fear of spilling it. 

Still giggling, they beckoned him close again, until he was standing just in front of them and they could reach up to tug on the front of his shirt. Milenko obliged them, leaning down, amusement still clear on his face and dancing in his eyes as Astoria kissed the tip of his nose.

“Cheeky bastard.” They teased, and Milenko hummed, bracing one knee on the couch to lean in while their arms came to rest around his shoulders. 

“I suppose you would be the authority on bastard behavior.”

Astoria gasped, smacking him lightly on the arm, but they both knew it was without any real force or meaning. They grinned at one another, Astoria trailing their fingers up to toy with the hair at the nape of Milan’s neck, as they hummed in contemplation.

“A bastard, am I?” 

“Mhm.” Milenko’s hands shifted to gently cup their cheeks as he met them for a proper kiss. “Beautiful, and certainly a minx, but undoubtedly a bastard.”

“You wouldn’t have me any other way.” Astoria said, smiling into the kiss Milenko led them into before he released them. He took a step back, eyes roaming, before he started to make his way to the chair he’d set up for himself and picked up his sketch pad from the coffee table between them. 

“Absolutely not.” He said, gesturing for them to sit back, and Astoria took another quick sip of their tea before resuming the comfortable pose they’d found earlier. Their left hand, however, raised so they could lightly rest their knuckles against the side of their chin, elbow still propped on the arm of the sofa to ensure they could hold the position at least for a little while. 

They watched as he crossed his ankle over his knee, bracing his pad against his leg and drawing a few light lines on his paper. He glanced up, then down, and the cycle began anew, filling the living room with little other sound than the scratch of his pencil and the quiet cooing of the doves in the next room. 

As they sat, their mind wandered, and Astoria came to realize with some amusement that there was something of a reversal in their roles. Usually it was themself who would be the one with the eye for anatomy, always scrutinizing, always curious, determining which parts most impacted the whole. Even then their eyes were on Milan’s figure - they were sure few could blame them, as he cut a rather dashing one - but they traced the familiar curve of his shoulders, the slight movements of his brow as it furrowed and lifted, the shape of his hand as it moved across his paper. 

The most catching thing, though, were his eyes. They knew that in itself was a line they could surely read in one of their romances, but it was the simple fact that each time they caught his eye, they felt like they were somehow the most desirable creature to ever share a space with him. But they found that sort of love and want in his eyes often, in moments mundane and romantic and everywhere in between, from the first time they met him in the morning to the last kiss they shared at night. 

Though, they supposed that was simply the nature of loving Milenko, and being loved by him in return. He did not love in half measures, he loved and admired with all the strength his river heart could give. 

“I know that look.” Milenko said after a little while, and Astoria paused, pulling their knuckle away from their lip and raising a brow at him. 

“What look?”

“Your thinking face, but it’s not the ‘I’m thinking about bones’ face. It’s the ‘I’m up to no good’ face.” Milenko leaned back in his chair, lowering his pencil slightly. “Dare I ask what’s in that head of yours?”

Astoria pretended to contemplate, then shrugged, repositioning their hand when Milenko leaned in to shade part of his sketch. “Would you believe me if I told you I was just thinking about how much I love you?”

“If anything, that just makes me feel more suspicious of you.” Milenko laughed as Astoria pouted at him, throwing them something of a cheeky wink. “Though if you must keep your plans to yourself, I suppose I’ll just have to be surprised.”

“Oh, you do love me.” Astoria teased, smiling as Milenko shook his head in amusement. “Though I was trying to find an interesting way to invite you to come take a closer look. You don’t need to sit all stiff in your chair. I wouldn’t mind.”

“I didn’t realize you could see past my sketch pad.”

Milenko’s quip made them let out a bark of laughter. They clasped a hand over their mouth as their shoulders shook, and Milenko leaned back, fighting back a grin as Astoria tried in vain to stifle the sound. Loud, high pitched, rapid staccato - Astoria felt fairly qualified calling the ‘hee-hee-hee’ sound of it hyena-like.

“Oh, I hate you!” They got out, and Milenko’s beaming smile widened, knowing they didn’t mean it at all. “Please, Milan, I’m trying so hard to be all pretty!”

“On the contrary, beloved, I love to hear your laugh.” Milenko himself let out a small chuckle when Astoria put their knuckle between their teeth, the sheer ridiculousness of their own laugh making them somehow giggle more. “Don’t stop on my account. After all, I’ve been away from drawing your face for a little while.”

The pair fell into relative quiet again; Astoria’s giggles, even as they tapered off, certainly kept it from being completely silent, paired with the scratching of his pencil. They could sort of follow his progress as he went, his eyes starting to land more frequently near their shoulders, their waist, their legs each time he looked up from the page. 

They had no concept of how long they’d been sitting there, perfectly relaxed and simply enjoying watching him as he worked, but eventually they saw Milenko lean forward, setting his pencils on the coffee table and holding his sketch pad up a little before he nodded. 

“Alright, moment of truth.” He teased, and Astoria cracked a smile as they swung their legs around to sit up on the sofa. 

He turned the sketchpad around, and though Astoria could see much from here, they had to squint slightly to make out the finer lines. And, well, that certainly wouldn’t do, not when Astoria had an agenda of their own. 

“Come, come sit and show me. I can’t see the details with you sitting all the way over there.” They said, patting the cushion beside them lightly to try and beckon him closer. 

They were slightly perplexed when he hesitated, shifting slightly in his seat, but after a few beats of pause he stood - to which Astoria realized, warmth flooding their cheeks, that his earlier jest had been weighted in truth.

Regardless, Milenko made his way over to sit beside them, offering them his sketch pad as they draped an arm around his shoulders as they settled. He sat close enough for the sides of their thighs to press together, their chin coming to rest on his left shoulder and their right hand on the curve between his neck and his right shoulder. In the moment, however, looking at his sketch made them feel…to quote one of their novels, warm and puddly down to their belly. 

Their eyes immediately landed on their face, and even in the form of a sketch, they could see the way their eyes seemed heavy-lidded, the shading across their cheeks indicative of a light blush, their knuckle pressed to their lip - all together, not an expression they would have ever imagined on their face. 

“I do believe, if we are cycling back to the concept of the hypothetical romance novel, I would accuse you of making me look too sultry.” 

“I didn’t make you look anything.” Milenko laughed, shaking his head as he set the sketch pad aside, turning to give Astoria a proper kiss. “That’s how you were looking at me the almost whole time.”

Their free hand slid down the front of his shirt to neatly undo the first button, and when Milenko’s breath caught a little in his throat, Astoria leaned back, raising a brow at him in silent invitation to stop them if he wished. 

“I don’t suppose you can blame me.” Astoria mused, their fingers sliding down to the next button. “I let my thoughts entertain me, and with you right there for me to admire…well, it’s certainly not a leap to consider where my head went. Perhaps a small step.”

When Milenko nodded, Astoria popped the button near the middle of his chest, and slipped their hand under the edge to rest them on his bare skin, smiling a little at the fluttering pace of his heartbeat beneath their fingertips. 

“I knew you were up to something when I asked.”

“I really was thinking about how much I love you, you know. But I also would be lying if I said I wasn’t plotting.”

“There it is.” Milenko teased, his hand resting over theirs, pressing it flat to his chest. “I knew you were up to no good. Care to share those plans, or does that make me a witness? I don’t want to testify against you in court.”

“No, it’s not anything illegal.” Astoria snorted, but their mouth curled up at the corners, like a cat that had gotten the cream. “But I can show you, if you’d like.”

When Milenko indicated his agreement, Astoria shifted to swing a leg over his lap, but he was already meeting them halfway - an arm around their waist and a hand on the nape of their neck as they met for a kiss. This one did not remain chaste for long, as Astoria reached between them to finish unbuttoning his shirt, asking him softly if they could please make love with him between those shared kisses. 

Milenko’s answer had been, “fuck yes”, to which Astoria was both amused and fairly confident that consent could not be given more enthusiastically. 

Astoria had never had the experience of being a ‘horny teenager’, but they imagined it felt something like this as they laughed with each other, Milenko tangling in the sleeves of his shirt and trying to take off his pants with Astoria still straddling him - pouting when Astoria insisted he’d have a better chance at doing so if he let them get up. 

When they stood, they took a few steps away, reaching for their discarded dressing gown to dig in the pockets for the protection they’d tucked into one of them. Idly, they flicked it at him, stifling a laugh as he paused and looked around to see what had bounced off his bare back. 

“What -” Astoria heard Milenko’s incredulous laugh as he picked up the packet in question, momentarily distracted from the task at hand. “Did you just throw a condom at me?” 

“I did. I thought it would be rude to not supply one when I was the one who initiated. It was in my pocket.” Astoria shrugged, looking pointedly at the trail of hair leading down from his navel, disappearing beneath the waist of his pants. “Not that it’ll do you much good while you’re still clothed.”

“You thought it’d be rude to - you know what, I love you so much.” Milenko was laughing quietly to himself as he did a little shimmy to work his pants down his hips before he kicked them aside, grabbing Astoria’s hand to pull them back down to the couch until they settled in his lap again. 

His fingers would slide between their thighs, his first two fingers inside and his thumb against their clit as they shared languid, heavy kisses aplenty, Milenko’s mouth trailing down to press a kiss over their heart. They had teased him once - while reading aloud the worst passages of their erotica to make them both laugh - that he could play them as well as his mandolin, building them up easily to that precipice with fingers that were well versed in just what they liked. But they would stop him before they let themself get too carried away in that pleasure, clearly more than his fingers on their mind that particular night. 

Astoria’s hand slid up the side of his neck, thumb gently against his chin as they tipped his head back - coaxing him to relax toward the cushion as they rose up on their knees a little to keep hold of his gaze. 

“Let me, mo chridhe. Let me lead.” They murmured, kissing the swell of his cheek and smiling as his hands slid up the backs of their thighs. “Unless you find that to be a terrible arrangement, in which case I’m prepared to hear an alternative argument. I do hope you have citations.”

“Not even the slightest argument from me.” Milenko squeezed the back of their thighs, a playful smile on his face for a moment before his expression softened, his eyes warm and his palms somehow warmer on their skin when they came to rest on their hips. “Kiss me, Astoria?”

“I’ll think about it.” 

Milenko huffed a laugh through his nose as Astoria granted his request with a loving smile, truly more than happy to do so. Their hands shifted, one falling to rest on his shoulder and the other slipping between their bodies to take his cock in hand. The sound Milenko made at the touch was thrown into the open air as Astoria leaned back to angle their hips slightly, both of their gazes falling between them as Astoria felt its head against them. 

Astoria sunk down carefully, a long, slow stroke as their foreheads pressed together, Milenko letting out a soft groan as Astoria’s eyes fell shut. They could feel his fingers pressing into their hips, one of his hands lifting to gently push some of Astoria’s hair out of their face as they seated themself fully upon him. 

Even with his agreement to let them lead, Milenko was not an idle partner - not that that was a complaint in the slightest from Astoria. Nor did he try to take the lead from them. Once Astoria had set the pace, Milenko joined their rhythm, their hips moving together and hands roaming, Milenko’s kisses trailing from their mouth to the curve of their jaw and further down their throat. There was no haste between them, only those soft, sweet touches and their shared kisses, and the steady roll of Astoria’s hips as they rode him. 

To Astoria, even with romantic partners, physical contact had to be approached in stages. Some of it was acclimation to the heartbeat of another, the constant awareness as soon as their skin brushed until they separated again. Too much at once was overstimulating in the worst context of the word, but with time, they could become accustomed to it and even enjoy that reminder of the company of their loved ones. It had been much the same as they became accustomed to Milenko’s heartbeat, and they had welcomed his touch, even seeking out the physical contact until it was as natural as taking a breath of air to have a hand - gloved or otherwise - somewhere on his personage. 

But like this, as they came together now? 

Even they could not distinguish between the pounding of their own heart in their ears and the sound of his, two beats tangling together in such a way that Astoria could have likened it to the beating of a hummingbird’s wings. They could feel one of his hands on their thigh, tucked against the space where it met their hip, his mouth on their chest, his opposite hand braced flat against the middle of their back. One of their own was resting on the back of the couch, using it for leverage, while the other rested lightly on the back of his neck as if to try and bring him closer still. A familiar sense of warmth began to settle in their lower abdomen, and the pace of their hips quickened, the heat of their cheeks warming them nearly down to their collar as they went. 

Somehow, without even looking at them fully, Milenko knew - his mouth shifting away from their chest and landing first on their collarbone, then the side of their neck, before they finally heard his voice in their ear ask the simple question they’d heard him ask many times before

“What do you need, sweetness?”

“Your hand-” 

Astoria had hardly finished the words before his fingers were already slipping between their thighs, rubbing gentle circles on their clit in the same way he did before, and they soon pulled him into a kiss once more. 

With Milenko’s fingers on them, they changed their rhythm slightly, slowing the speed of their hips but taking him more deeply - determined to bring him to the same point of pleasure even as their thighs trembled with every upward thrust he met them with. They were beginning to dance along that razor’s edge before orgasm, the kisses between them more haphazard, and they felt Milenko’s hand on their back slide down to their waist to hold them closer. He knew it, just as they did, as this part of their intimacy was familiar enough. 

They did not finish together, though neither of them were particularly bothered by that. Astoria went first, forehead pressed to his and muttering something under their breath as they continued to roll their hips into him through their orgasm. Milenko would follow soon after, and together they would sit, arms twining around each other as they caught their breath, sharing soft kisses and whispering quiet words of love to one another until they motivated themselves off the couch. 

Later, after they’d cleaned themselves up and made their way to Astoria’s bed, Astoria found their fingers tracing the lines of his tattoos, head resting on his arm and legs tangled together. 

“Milenko?”

He’d hummed in acknowledgement, idly smoothing back their hair to kiss their brow as Astoria continued. 

“I do hope the dogs didn’t walk in on us. I’m not sure they’d look at either of us the same.”

Astoria’s lips were red and swollen from kissing, and already curving up as Milenko trailed downwards, lifting their nightgown up to their ribs with his hands. He kissed their bared skin with well placed, but hungry kisses, each of them carefully planted. 

“Please, don’t behave on my account.” 

Milenko met Astoria’s cheek with some of his own: “Who said I planned to?” 

“Since you’re acting all—“ their point was lost to a moan they tried to stifle by biting their bottom lip, as Milenko decided to leave a love bite on their things. His mouth sucked and nipped gently enough to make Astoria shiver, but long enough to leave a mark. 

He changed from one thigh to another, as to not leave either neglected. He ran his fingers from the bottom of Astoria’s entrance, teasing the wetness there by circling it with his fingers. Circular movements with his fingertips, not quite pushing them into Astoria, and then dragging them up all the way to their clit. 

His mouth moved up their inner thigh as Milenko moved their hand so his thumb was rubbing gentle circles on Astoria’s clit, while his index and middle finger began moving into Astoria, pressing against their g-spot every time they moved back and forth. 

“Any further complaints, Beloved?” Milenko said, looking at Astoria’s face, entranced, as his hand kept moving, pupils blown wide as he took Astoria’s pleasured face in. 

“Your mouth is not on me.” 

“It will be.” 

“Pro— shit, promise?” 

Milenko kissed right beneath their navel. “On my love for you I do.” 

Milenko’s promise was true, but he didn’t put his mouth on Astoria right away. He waited until he would feel Astoria arch their back, squeezing their thighs around his head, and curling their toes behind his back. Only then his thumb left their clit to be replaced with his tongue, Milenko sucking on it and then again, and again, and again. 

It wasn’t too long until Astoria began running one of their hands through his hair, tugging at it whenever something felt particularly good. They were wet, Astoria’s slick cum over his lips and his chin as he continued to suck on their clit; it covered his fingers as he pumped them in and out of Astoria. 

They almost hadn’t come that night, but something told them they should, if for no other reason than to get a slight change of scenery. 

As the night went on, guests trickled in and trickled out, some familiar, some not. Among those to arrive was Nana, whose arrival was almost expected - rarely did he fail to appear - but Astoria hadn’t expected him to bring a plus one, and especially not Milenko. Not that he was an unwelcome surprise - Astoria just didn’t think he’d have been interested in the affair, though he seemed to blend easily with the crowd as Nana introduced his cousin to some of his colleagues. 

For a while, the two of them had been trading lingering looks here and there, smiles pulling at faces and a step taken toward each other before one of them got pulled into someone else’s conversation. At one point Astoria almost laughed at the near pout on Milenko’s face when Nana snatched him away to introduce him to a face they couldn’t name, shaking their head and giving him a cheeky wave before they let themself get pulled into a healthy debate with a colleague from the archives.

Eventually, Astoria managed to slip away from it all, stepping out onto the balcony with a sigh of relief. Crisp winter air swept over their face and carried the evening bird song to their ears, easing the tension in their shoulders as they pulled their shawl a little tighter around themself. 

They didn’t know how long they stood out there, watching their breath turn to fog and tuning out the chatter they could hear beyond the door that led back inside, but it was long enough for them to not notice the door open and someone approach them once it fell shut. 

The lower edge of a ceramic mug tapped their shoulder, making them jump a bit as they turned to meet Milenko’s warm smile and the outstretched cup, the handle turned toward them for them to take. 

“Thought you wouldn’t want to miss the cocoa when it came out.” He said, and Astoria smiled, nodding as they pulled their hands from their pockets and gratefully accepted the warm drink. 

“Oh, I forgot Nadia likes to bring cocoa out when the weather gets cool. Thank you.”

“I think we’re well past ‘cool’ and into ‘terribly cold’.” He teased, and Astoria snorted into their mug as he leaned forward to rest his forearms on the balcony railing.

“Should you ever have cause to visit Rosinmoor, you’ll be grateful for Vesuvia’s kind of winter. I thought my first winter here would be much worse and I was woefully over prepared for it.” Astoria glanced down toward his feet, then frowned a little, head tilting curiously. “Where’s Ursie? It’s rare I see one of you without the other.”

Milenko gestured loosely over his shoulder, making Astoria look toward where Ursula sat right next to the door - nose pressed to the glass just so to reveal her front teeth - enjoying the warmth of indoors while she kept an eye on her human. 

Astoria couldn’t help but laugh, turning around to rest their back against the railing and sticking their tongue at Ursula playfully, snickering under her breath when a pink tongue slid across the glass as if to answer. 

“Can’t say I blame her for staying in. Nattie would be doing the same if she were here, but I couldn’t wrestle her out of my bed. She’s probably still asleep in my blankets. I’ll probably be joining her before too long, if I’m honest.”

“Tired?” Milenko asked, and Astoria shook their head, letting out a soft sigh. 

“More so bored. I come to these mostly because I don’t want to be rude to Nadia for all the effort she puts in, but...they’re not really my cup of tea. Or cocoa, I suppose.” They raised their mug a little at that, and Milenko chuckled, standing to lean against the railing with them instead.

“I don’t think these are really my scene, either.”

“Didn’t you come as Nana’s plus one tonight?” 

“I did, but I didn’t really come for the party.” He nudged them lightly with his elbow, making them pause mid sip and look up at him. “Do you want to get out of here?”

Astoria raised a brow, watching as he swigged the rest of his cocoa and set the mug neatly on the railing. “Get out of here?”

“Yeah. Neither of us are having a good time here, so...maybe we can go snag a bite to eat and chat for a while before you head home.” Milenko held out his hand, wiggling his fingers lightly as if trying to tempt them to take it. “Unless you’ve got a hot date that you need to get back to.”

With a snort of laughter, Astoria drank the last bit of their cocoa and dropped their hand neatly into his palm - their own mug left behind to sit beside his. 

“Absolutely I do not. Lead the way, poet man.”

“‘Poet man’?”

“Shut up, you know I’m not good at nicknames.”

Snickering, Milenko pulled their arm to loop it neatly through his, dramatically looking around as if to make sure nobody was watching their escape from the dining hall. Astoria, for their part, was more focused on stifling their laughter until they were out of earshot, swatting at his arm playfully as they went. 

Astoria didn’t catch the amused shake of Nana’s head when Milenko threw a wave at his cousin, though they were sure to be teased when they came to work in the morning. 

*     *     *     *     *

The pair had ducked into the first tavern they’d come across, Ursula slipping under the table as they snatched the last empty booth and squeezed into the bench seat. Astoria could feel her tail against the back of their ankles, knowing she’d taken up a space between the booth and the back of Milenko’s legs. They were seated close enough together for his arm to brush theirs as he poured them a glass from the bottle of wine they’d bought to share, close enough that when he turned to pass it to them they could see the way the light bounced off his earrings and danced on his cheeks. 

“There we are.” He murmured, and Astoria couldn’t help but return his smile, tapping the edge of their glass lightly against his when he extended it. “Cheers.”

“Slàinte mhath.” 

“Bless you.”

Astoria choked on the sip they’d taken from their glass as they laughed, spotting his teasing grin and swatting at him after they managed to catch their breath again.

“You know what, I take back my toast, I wish the worst health upon you.” They laughed, shaking their head when Milenko gave them those big brown puppy eyes that killed them every time and trying to steel their resolve -

“Would you really wish ill upon me?”

Mission failed.

“No, but I’m still going to pout about the fact that my nose burns now.” Astoria wrinkled the feature in question before they cautiously sipped at their glass again, giving him a teasing side eye of sorts once they set it down. “But you can make it up to me by telling me more about that article you’re working on. The one you were talking about on our way in?”

Milenko nodded, curls bouncing as a smile pulled across his face. “Right, I was. I think I’d just told you I passed it along to my editor…”

The two fell into easy conversation, flowing between them like the ale from the taps or the water in the side canals mere feet beyond the tavern door. 

Astoria had always enjoyed his company. Milenko was warm and welcoming, the smile that came to his face amplifying the natural presence he had about him. They tried to return that friendly warmth as well, but they had come to realize that those feelings of friendly warmth had changed into something new. Not that they minded - in fact, with him, they’d welcome the sort of romantic affection that was blooming if it were reciprocated. 

But for now, with one hand propping up their chin as they listened, they let the world narrow down to just Milenko. 

He made their heart feel like a hummingbird, beating so fast in their chest every time they crossed each other’s paths that they thought it might pop straight out from their ribs and follow him when he left. 

They weren’t sure anyone had ever made them feel this way before. They’d attempted relationships a few times in the past, but the connection never felt like it was there. They were too strange, too work obsessed, too cold - that one had particularly hurt - but always too much for things to work out.

Milenko saw them as they were, and hadn’t been put off by what he’d seen. In fact, he’d embraced it fully, all the way down to their last peculiarity, and seemed to always come back for more. 

They snapped back to focus when they heard him mention that if his editor gave it the all clear, his article would likely be published before the end of winter if all went according to plan. 

“I hope everything goes smoothly, then.” Astoria said with a smile. “Do let me know when I should keep an eye out for it. I’ve always enjoyed reading your work. The content is always interesting, but I find that the way your passion and your intrigue seeps into your writing so enthralling. Usually when I pick it up I can’t put it down.”

“I didn’t know you read my writing that closely.” He said after a moment, a warm flush coloring his cheeks, and Astoria’s gaze dropped sheepishly to stare into the burgundy wine.

“It’s important to you, isn’t it?” They gave him a light smile, tracing the tip of their finger around the rim of their glass. “You listen so intently when I tell you about bones, or heartbeats, or the time I went on a thirty minute tangent about how butterflies are - how did I put it?”

Milenko tried - and failed - to hide his grin behind his drink. “‘Badass little bastards’, I think.”

“Right, badass little bastards.” Astoria was about two seconds from repeating said tangent before they felt their face heat, clearing their throat in order to continue. “But you know it’s important to me, so you listen. And I know your writing is important to you, so I read it whenever I can.”

“I hope you don’t feel like you have to read it just because I listen to you.” He said after a moment, a thoughtful look on his face. “I listen to you because I’m interested in what you have to say.”

“No, no, it’s much the same for how I feel about your writing. I do find the topics you choose fascinating, so it’s also particularly easy to get invested in. The fact that you wrote it is a fun little bonus. And...” 

Maybe it was the wine - definitely not, knowing their own tolerance - but they hummed softly for a moment, mulling over their thoughts as they tried to piece together what they wanted to say. 

“I think you’re strange.” Astoria said after a moment, and Milenko let out a bewildered laugh, giving them something of a bemused look as he set his glass aside. 

“I do hope you mean that in a good way.”

Astoria laughed, nodding as they pushed their drink away from the edge of the table. “I do, I do, I promise. That was poor phrasing I mean that I like you because you’re strange. I’ve always been peculiar, what with my bones and my heartbeats like we said and my preference for dead people -”

“I know, I’ve been flattered to make the cut of breathing individuals you spend your time with.” Milenko laughed as Astoria smacked him with one of their gloves, the leather flapping harmlessly against his arm and their disgruntled look ruined by the smile they failed to hold back.

“I’m being serious, Milenko, only one of us is good with words so let me have this.”

He raised both hands in playful surrender, and Astoria tucked their gloves into their pockets with a lighthearted roll of their eyes, drumming bare fingertips idly on the surface of the table. It took them a few moments to gather their thoughts, but when they did, their eyes were fixed on their empty glass, watching the light and shadows dance across the surface. 

“I don’t often find myself in the company of the living because I know my peculiarity puts some people off. I am still grateful that my observations on your heartbeat did not do the same, though usually when I mention it to someone, I don’t get asked to have an extended conversation about matters of the heart.” Astoria’s mouth twitched up at the corner as they cast a bemused look at him out of the corner of their eye. “But I’ve come to know you. You are strange too, in your own way, and unabashedly so. It’s endearing. And I want to experience more, but...I’m not sure how I can just yet.”

“What do you mean?” He asked gently, and Astoria made a noncommittal sound that was far more casual than how they actually felt. 

“I’m quite awful at reading people.” Astoria shrugged, reaching for the bottle of wine again. “I don’t know what you’re willing to share with me, so I intend to follow your lead. But your writing lets me learn a little more about you, in a way, and a little more about what you’re willing to share with me. So I keep reading.”

Milenko fell quiet for a moment, but out of the corner of their eye, they could see him looking at them - watching as they poured a little more wine into their glass - and when they turned slightly, they poured some into his own, watching as his gaze shifted to the flowing liquid as it swirled and caught the light. 

“I’ve only ever seen you make that look before you take a dip in the canals.” They teased, and Milenko snorted, an amused look on his face as they set the bottle down. “Did the wine have some secrets to share?”

He laughed a little at that - Astoria knew he’d said once before that he’d once had visions manifest in flowing beer - and shook his head, pushing the glass aside rather than taking a drink from it. 

“No, only an inkling this time.” Milenko rested his cheek against his hand, elbow propped against the table as he watched them take a small sip of wine. 

“But if you want to know, it told me you could kiss me tonight.”

Oh. 

Oh. 

Had he not been a foot from them, they might have screamed when it finally clicked. 

Had he really been flirting all this time? They knew they were oblivious to some social situations, but damn, this was a new one. They could practically hear Edrine laughing at them for how oblivious they were in the next letter they wrote home, but perhaps it was worth it. 

When they managed to compose themself internally, they let out a slow breath through their nose, trying to steady their sudden nerves at the realization that those romantic feelings might not be so one sided. 

Maybe he’d been sharing more than they’d though.

“Did it, now?” They mused, setting the glass down and pushing it back from the edge of the table. “Presumptuous of the wine to think I’ll do all the work. You could kiss me instead, you know.”

They didn’t flinch when Milenko’s fingertips skated across the back of their ungloved hand, instead smiling lightly as they turned their palm over and felt his hand settle on their own. His other arm rested along the back of the bench seat, warm against their shoulder as he gave them such a soft, pretty smile it made them feel like mush.

“Well, if I kiss you, I would hope you’d kiss me back.” Milenko said softly, and when he began to lean in, Astoria was more than ready to lean in themself.

He met them halfway - Astoria had slipped her free hand up onto his shoulder, toying with the ends of his curls lightly before giving him a soft, chaste kiss that made everything else feel like it had disappeared. 

It was gentle and sweet, a kiss with not an expectation beyond it. It made them so warm, from the crown of their head to the tips of their toes, as they melted nearly completely into him with the gentle weight of his hand falling upon their back. 

When they broke apart after a moment, Astoria blinked once, twice, before they blurted out a “This isn’t just because of the wine, right?”

Milenko looked at them somewhat owlishly. “What?”

“The wine. You’re not inebriated, are you? I know I’m certainly not, but I don’t want you to do this if this is the wine making your decisions for you.”

“No, I’m not drunk.” Milenko chuckled a little, lifting his hand to gently rub his thumb across their jaw as they let out an audible sigh of relief. “Were you that worried?”

“Only a little.” Astoria smiled sheepishly. They leaned in after a moment, pressing a soft kiss to his cheek, then to the corner of his mouth, warmth heating their cheeks as they met his eyes again. “Mostly because I wanted to ask you for another, and I thought it would be a very poor thing to do if you weren’t thinking clearly.”

Milenko smiled at that, the hand against their jaw shifting to gently tip their head up once again. Their hand slid down to rest against his chest, hardly any space between them as they cracked a smile at the feeling of his heart beating rapidly under their palm. 

“Your heart is racing.” Astoria teased, as if their own didn’t feel like it was going to leap straight from their chest. “I thought perhaps another kiss was in order, but if I do you might make the hummingbirds jealous.”

“You’re full of shit.” Milenko chuckled, laying his free hand over the one on his chest and giving it a gentle squeeze. “May I?”

Astoria was already leaning in again, meeting him in another kiss, this one deepening slightly and lingering rather than being chaste. They could have turned into a puddle right there as they started to notice a bit more beyond the kiss this time - the warmth of his hands against their skin, the sound of their own heart in their ears like wingbeats, the smell of parchment and ink that lingered on his skin for all the writing he did. 

When they broke away this time, their foreheads pressed together, Astoria couldn’t help but match his smile as his nose rubbed lightly against theirs. 

“Let me walk you home.” He said, voice soft, and to Astoria’s amusement, sounding entirely like he didn’t want to follow through with what he’d said seconds prior. 

Astoria hummed softly in thought, a playful tone clear in their voice. “Done with me already?”

Milenko’s chuckle made them smile, closing their eyes as he pressed a kiss to their brow and slid out of the booth.

“Alas, I just heard the last call, and it’s late. But tomorrow is a new day, and I’d be more than happy to take you out for lunch.” When they slid out behind him, Astoria tucked her hand into his, gloves shoved neatly in their pockets and coat wrapped snugly around them. 

“My schedule just so happens to be clear.” They said, and Milenko laughed, giving their hand a squeeze as they made their way back onto the streets.

“Then lunch it is. Think about where you want to go.”

Together they’d begin the woefully short - in Astoria’s opinion - walk to their apartment, where Milenko would give them one last kiss to bid them goodnight and tell them that he’d pick them up at eleven thirty for lunch wherever they chose. 

He usually held some role among them, more and more frequently as they spent more time together and simple companionship turned to romantic partnership. And despite the frequency of his appearance in their journal - which he knew of, as Astoria had shown him specific entries on occasion when they struggled to speak of new feelings and worries they had - he was perfectly respectful of their privacy, and thus they had come to be entirely comfortable writing right beside him regardless of the topic at hand. 

Which was why they felt perfectly at ease, if a little warm, working through the newer feelings they’d begun to notice for him in recent weeks while sitting close enough for the side of their thigh to press against his. 

They weren’t strangers to being physically close. Milenko by then spent as much time in their apartment as they did in his, a not insignificant portion of that was spent curled up together one way or another, and Astoria held no doubt they were attracted to him as a person. But they’d come to a realization recently that they did, in fact, feel the sparks of sexual attraction and desire toward him, and it was something they wanted to explore. 

He’d caught them staring rather...disrespectfully, if they were honest, and he’d assured them with some amusement that they were welcome to do so whenever they like when it happened for a third time within the same hour stretch. And when they flushed and told him it wasn’t the looking that they were worried about, he’d looked them in the eye and told them that boundaries could always be discussed when they were ready. They’d melted under the warm reassurance, giving him a sweet smile and a kiss with gratitude and a promise that they’d be ready to talk more about it soon.

They knew the door was open, it was just a matter of passing through it to voice how quickly they were realizing that they wanted him. 

Astoria let out a long breath as they set their journal aside, stretching their arms high over their head and grunting softly when their shoulders popped loud enough for Milenko to glance up from the play and give them a look of amusement. 

“You alright?” He asked, a playful smile on his face as Astoria let one of their arms fall around his shoulders and pressed a kiss to his cheek. 

“Aye, just stiff. I think I spent too much time hunched over my desk today.” They gave him a squeeze before forcing themself up off the cushions, stretching their legs as they turned back to look at him. “I’m going to make myself some tea, maybe start winding down for the night. Would you like anything while I’m up?”

Milenko shook his head, straightening the papers in his lap and making a small note on the corner of one. “No, thank you. Let me just finish with this scene and I’ll join you.”

Astoria nodded, humming softly as they stepped into their small kitchen and popped the kettle on to boil. As soon as their teacup was on standby, they opened one of the cabinets, pulling out a tin and popping it open to shove a chocolate chip cookie in their face.

“You did not say you’d gone to the bakery today.” Milenko called, making Astoria laugh as they heard the clear rustle of papers and movement as he got up from his spot and made his way into the kitchen. 

“Didn’t I?” They asked around a mouthful of cookie, and Milenko snorted, reaching over their shoulder to snag one from the tin and take a bite of his own. “I thought I did. Picked them up when I went to get lunch from the market.”

Astoria turned to lean back against the counter, reaching for another cookie before the kettle whistled. They had hardly moved toward it when Milenko shoved the rest of his cookie in his mouth, carefully pouring the boiling water into their teacup and putting out the flame after he set it back down on the stovetop. 

“Oh, thank you.” They murmured, smiling as he nodded and laughing when he plucked the cookie straight out of their hand with a “you’re welcome” and a cheeky grin on his face. 

Astoria shook their head slightly, a bemused smile on their face as they dug out a spoon and carefully stirred a bit of honey into their tea while it steeped. 

“Are you showering tonight or in the morning, Mila? I’ll likely do so tonight, but I’ll be in there a while, so I don’t want to be in your way.”

“Tonight, but if you want it first, I don’t mind waiting. I still have a bit left of Octavia’s play that can keep me busy.”

The spoon stopped in the teacup as a thought struck them, realizing that the door was wide open for them to walk through if they just spoke up in that moment.

They weren’t quite ready to dive straight into sex. They wanted to ease into that kind of intimacy, even though they knew they wanted him, and see what would come of it if they just took their time. But this seemed like a good opportunity to suggest something small, something Astoria knew they would be comfortable with, taking him in while there wouldn’t be any pressure to take things further if they didn’t want to. 

And, well, they’d be lying if they said they weren’t stricken suddenly with the thought of him absolutely dripping wet, being able to run their hands over completely bare skin rather than just the spots they dared pass their fingers over when his shirts left much of his chest exposed - 

“Astoria?” 

Milenko’s hand gently touched their elbow, making them noticeably jump as they broke from their reverie. Sheepishly, they tossed the spoon into the sink and raised the cup to their lips, cheeks a bit warm as they met his gaze again and took a sip of their tea. 

“Sorry...just got lost in thought.”

“Anything particularly interesting? You don’t look that out of it unless you have new bones you’re studying.”

They cracked a smile at that, tracing the tips of their fingers along the powder blue designs on the side of their teacup as they gazed down into it. The hand he’d settled on their arm was warm, thumb rubbing slow, lazy circles through the sleeve of their blouse as he looked at them with that gentle smile that always had them melting a little more. 

“No, no bones, for once. I was just thinking…” Astoria began, setting their teacup on the counter and hooking two fingers into the laces of one of those damn black poet shirts, “..that if you wanted, you could join me.”

Their face heated as Milenko’s eyes lowered to the hand that played with the laces of his shirt, then lifted back to their own, holding their gaze steadily as his hands fell to settle on their waist. 

“In the shower?” 

Astoria’s lips quirked up at the corners. “No, in the closet - yes, in the shower, we’ve just been talking about it.”

Milenko snorted as he gave their waist a gentle squeeze, stepping in closer to lean his forehead lightly against theirs. His voice softened, but he was no less serious as he addressed them, holding their gaze for a moment before he let his eyes fall shut. 

“What would you want if I do join you, Astoria?”

They knew what he was asking. It was a request to define the boundary, to make clear what they were looking for so they could move forward on the same page. And thus, Astoria smiled, reaching up to brush a few curls away from his face and place a chaste kiss on his lips. 

“Just to wash. I doubt it would save water, and we are completely capable of doing so on our own, but that doesn’t necessarily mean we have to.” 

“Just to wash.” Milenko echoed with a nod, lifting his head to press a lingering kiss to their brow. “Might mean I don’t freeze when I get out of the shower for once.”

“If we do, we’ll freeze together.” Astoria laughed, looping their arms around his shoulders and giving him a squeeze before sobering enough to give him a more serious look. “But only if you want to. I won’t be offended if you don’t, I just...wanted to put the offer out there.”

Milenko shook his head, smoothing a strand of hair behind their ear - and they realized, with some delight, that his cheeks had flushed ever so lightly when he met their gaze. 

“No, no...I want to.” He smiled warmly at them as they turned their head to kiss his wrist, closing their eyes when their lips pressed to his skin. “Do you want me to wait out here while you undress?”

With cheeks flushing hot as they took a step back and took his hand, they shook their head, lacing their fingers together as they led him out of the kitchen and toward the bathroom with their heart in their throat. 

When they stepped over the threshold, Astoria busied themself at first with getting the water going - it took forever to heat up to tolerable temperatures - and pulling out fresh towels for them both before finally, finally turning back to face Milenko where he stood in the doorway. They cracked a smile at that, extending a hand to him and beckoning him closer with one finger. 

“Kind of hard to shower if you’re not actually in the bathroom, Mila.”

“Just waiting for you to invite me in.” He chuckled, taking their hand as he stepped inside and pressing their knuckles to his lips. “May I?”

Astoria nodded, guiding his hands to their hips and helping him tug their blouse out from where it had been tucked into their trousers. Gentle hands skimmed up their sides, bringing the fabric with them until Astoria had to lift their arms for him to pull it off over their head - laughing when their glasses got caught in the collar and having to untangle themself before they could let the fabric fall to the tile floor. 

They undressed each other slowly, each taking the other in as they bared themselves piece by piece of clothing - though Astoria noted with some amusement that they had a few layers more than he did, but Milenko didn’t seem to mind. His hands roamed with Astoria’s permission, hands smoothing down the sides of their arms and a featherlight brush of his knuckles down the center of their chest as they leaned up to give him a kiss that they hoped shared all the warmth and affection that was bubbling up in their chest. 

And then they told him, pulling back and whispering against his lips as sweetly as they could muster, that they weren’t wrestling with his ridiculously tight pants and that those were his problem to deal with. 

He laughed, already working his pants down his thighs when Astoria carefully removed their glasses - separating the beaded chain from each arm before carefully placing the folded frames on the narrow sink counter as they turned to face him again. 

Astoria always felt a little vulnerable whenever they exposed any bit of skin. Clothing had been their armor against the world, protecting them from unwanted contact that might come their way so that they didn’t need to worry about an unwelcome heartbeat or distractions influenced by their magic. It was simply easier to keep their guard up.

Milenko made them feel as if they didn’t need that armor - and they weren’t sure that they ever thought otherwise. His heartbeat had become a creature comfort, the brush of his skin against their own a balm for a mind weary at the end of the day that they missed when they found themselves apart from each other.  

So when they stood bare in front of him, they felt perfectly relaxed, accepting his outstretched hand with a sweet smile and leading him under the spray that had finally warmed to an agreeable temperature for them both. Astoria let him have the water first, busying themself by sifting through the bottles to find a scent that spoke to them that evening. 

“Do you care what soap I use?” 

“Not particularly.” Milenko slicked wet curls back and let out a snort of amusement as he took in the sheer number of bottles tucked neatly onto the shelf. “How many of those do you actually use?”

Astoria shrugged, unscrewing the cap on a bottle and raising it to their nose to sniff. “Well, all of them, if you mean on a grand scale. I just prefer to have options.” 

When they finally settled on a scent and began to scrub the washcloth They took the chance, as they began first to scrub up his arm and toward his shoulder, to take him in. They’d only stolen glimpses as they helped him undress, but, well...Astoria could tell themself all they wanted about analytical curiosity, but they really just wanted to ogle. 

“I’ve never realized how lovely your bone structure is.” Astoria mused idly, feeling Milenko’s chest shake under their hand when he laughed as they rubbed the washcloth across his skin. 

“Well, thank you. I don’t think I’ve been complimented on them before.”

“I don’t think I’ve ever complimented a living person’s bones, either. Normally I don’t get to look at them until they’ve been dead for at least a couple hundred years.” A smile pulled at the corners of their lips as they looked up, pausing as his hand brushed gently across their jaw and leaning their head lightly into his touch. 

“Lucky me.” He teased, making Astoria blush somewhat sheepishly as he tucked a few strands of damp hair behind their ear. His fingers lingered there for a moment before he gave them a meaningful look, brow raised and thumb tapping lightly against their cheek. “I don’t think you invited me in here because you wanted to look at my bone structure, though. What’s on your mind?” 

Their hand slowed slightly as it passed over the mermaid tattooed on his side, just as their cheeks warmed and their gaze fixed firmly on the dusting of hair on his chest. 

“‘Whatever you’re comfortable with or curious about’.” Astoria said after a moment, busying their hands by working up a new lather on the washcloth. “I know we’ve talked about boundaries before, but...you said that, and that if it was something I wanted to discuss again, the option was there. And I’d like to do that, if you’re willing.” 

Milenko gently took the cloth from their hand, setting it aside and opening his arms to them, a silent offer they took him up on when they stepped into his embrace and draped their arms over his shoulders. 

“Not the venue I would have thought you would have chosen for this conversation, but I’m not complaining.” He teased, an arm wrapping around their waist and his other hand rubbing their back slowly as they leaned into him under the spray. “I’m listening, sweetness, tell me what’s in that mind of yours.”

Astoria smiled a little at that, playing idly with the wet hair at the nape of his neck as they tried to figure out where to start - they’d written out most of their feelings in the journal, but it was a matter of organizing them, in a sense. Knowing what they wanted to say was one thing, getting it all out in a way that felt clear was another. 

“You remember I told you before that I wasn’t ready for some types of physical intimacy?” They said eventually, and when Milenko nodded, they continued with eyes fixed on a spot on his collarbone.

“I’m no stranger to that kind of intimacy, I’ve had partners before, it just...takes me time, and the right connection with the right person, for me to realize that I am attracted to someone sexually. And I’ve never doubted my emotional attraction toward you, but I suppose I realized that things shifted for me, recently, and I began to look at you differently.” Astoria mused, running their fingers through his wet curls and smiling a little when he smoothed their wet bangs away from their forehead. 

“Can I ask what sparked this realization of yours?” He asked gently, Astoria nodding before they continued. 

“I sometimes want the experience of physical pleasure despite not having a partner. I know how my body works, and I will indulge myself, though I never find my thoughts aimed anywhere in particular when I do.” Astoria felt his hand slow on their back, resting on the back of their shoulder as they felt their cheeks heat the more they spoke. “But I realized my attraction toward you had shifted when I found myself thinking about how much I wanted your fingers between my thighs rather than my own.”

Milenko made a sound like he choked on air at that admission, but Astoria was only half aware of it, the floodgates opened for all of their thoughts to come pouring out unhindered. 

“I thought it was perhaps a one-off thing, but when I tried again a few days later, I just kept thinking of you. I was daydreaming at first, thinking of how much I love the feeling of your hands on my skin whenever we curl up in bed, and then my mind just kept going. I was thinking of what it would be like for you to hold me in your lap when you touched me - your hands are so gentle, always, and the thought of your fingers inside me while your thumb rubs my clit the way I like...it was intense. Very intense, actually, more so than I usually feel on my own.”

Astoria scratched their cheek with one hand, feeling the heat of their face under their fingertips and hoping the blush wasn’t as intense as they felt it was getting as they continued. 

“Which, I’ve never worked myself up to three fingers on my own before, so that told me something as well when I did so while thinking of you. But I haven’t done anything since, because I felt a little guilty afterwards, and I wanted to talk to you about it because I thought you should know. And I’m sorry if knowing that makes you uncomfortable, I just...wanted to be honest. You deserve that much.”

They were quiet for a long, long moment before they felt his fingers on their chin, tipping their head up gently to look them in the eye once it was clear they were done talking. 

Milenko’s face was flushed, they realized with some inner delight, heat and intrigue clear enough in his eyes that they melted a little the longer they held his gaze. 

“You don’t need to apologize, Astoria, I promise you I am as far from uncomfortable as I can be.” He leaned in - slowly, to give them time to pull back if they wanted - and pressed a kiss to their cheek before he continued. “I appreciate your honesty. I’m...flattered, honestly, that you’re thinking of me in that way.”

Milenko’s hand fell from their chin then, finding their hand and giving it a squeeze before he continued. 

“If you were worried I wouldn’t feel the same, don’t. I’ve never thought of you in that particular manner, but not for a lack of attraction. If you want me to touch you in the way you were describing, we can do that, but nothing has to happen now. We can just see where it takes us, see what works for us, and if nothing happens, that’s fine. I’ll follow your lead, sweetness, all you have to do is ask.”

He raised their hand to his lips, pressed a kiss to their knuckles, giving them a look that made them want to puddle on the floor - not only for the heat that lingered there, but for the love, the unspoken affection and care he always made clear. 

So they smiled, leaning up and giving him a light kiss, a soft smile on their lips that he returned when they pressed their foreheads together and hoped their eyes returned just the same feelings their poet never seemed to fail to express. 

“Thank you, Mila.” Astoria murmured, rubbing their nose lightly against his. “Let’s finish washing up, yeah?”

*     *     *     *     *     *

When they finally managed to drag themselves from the warmth of the shower, it wasn’t long before they curled up in bed together to rest. They were still bare, enjoying the intimacy of being simply close to one another, Milenko’s head on their shoulder and their fingers combing lazily through his curls as they slowly dried. His arm was draped comfortably over their waist - a weight that on any other night would have lulled them to sleep - but they couldn’t get their mind to quiet enough to sleep. 

There was a skylight above Astoria’s bed, one that gave a clear view up to the stars and the bright moon on nights such as these where there wasn’t a cloud in the sky. Milenko’s hair slipped through their fingers like silk, nails tracing up and down his scalp the way he liked to try and coax him into sleep even if they had a feeling they wouldn’t be following him too quickly. It could have been minutes, it could have been hours, but Astoria had been content to watch the stars until Milenko’s voice drew their attention. 

“You’re still awake?” Milenko asked softly, and Astoria jumped, smiling sheepishly as he adjusted to prop his head on the pillow beside their own. 

“Can’t sleep.” They admitted, turning onto their side to meet his eyes. “I would have thought you’d have fallen asleep by now, too.”

“No, I can’t sleep, either. Too many thoughts for the mind to rest.”

He kissed their palm lightly when their hand came to rest on his cheek, lashes fluttering slightly as he laid his hand over their own and pressed another kiss to the tips of their fingers. Milenko curled their fingers then, kissing their knuckles, then turned their hand over again to press his lips to the delicate skin of their wrist. 

“Milenko?” They breathed, face heating as he looked at them with those warm, dark eyes through his lashes when he placed another kiss on their palm.

“Yes, sweetness?” He asked, voice soft and a gentle smile on his face.

Astoria wet dry lips as they took his hand in theirs, giving it a gentle squeeze as they leaned in to press their forehead against his. “I want you to touch me. Like I told you about.” 

Milenko was quiet for a moment, lacing their fingers together and returning the squeeze with something of a serious look on his face. “You’re sure?” 

“I am.”

“If it’s too much...” 

“I’ll tell you, I promise.” Astoria smiled softly, kissing Milenko’s nose and letting one of their hands rest lightly on the back of his neck. “I just want you. Won’t you kiss me, Mila?”

“I think I can make that happen.” He teased, chuckling as he leaned in to do just that, Astoria stifling the amused giggle that bubbled up in order to kiss him properly.  

The kisses started chaste - lingering perhaps a moment or two before they would pull apart and then lean in to kiss each other again. A single kiss became two, then three, and before they realized it Astoria was tangling their fingers in his hair and deepening the kiss in an effort to chase more, more, more of the feeling of his lips against theirs and the sensation of their heart beating so fast it might fly from their chest now that they got to hold him like this.

If they thought their heart was beating quickly before, they thought it might burst when Milenko’s lips traveled down their jaw in time with the languid pace his hand made its way down their body, touch featherlight as it eventually trailed down their chest and abdomen. His kisses met the curve of their neck as Astoria spread their thighs a little wider, letting out a trembling sigh into the open air when his fingers met the wetness between them and passed lightly over their clit.

He had undressed them patiently, kissing each bit of revealed skin, gently tutting them to be patient. He’d done so with their gloves, their shirt, their pants. He had also kissed their lips, each of them deep, luscious, heated.

He hadn’t denied nor teased, not strictly, instead taking everything at a gentle pace, his thumb rubbing against Astoria. Their faces close, their kisses plenty, even if sometimes they became more of breathing into each other’s mouths. Milenko smiled: Astoria —as much as they loved being face to face like this— was getting impatient.

“Milenko,” Astoria grumbled impatient between kisses, their hands on Milenko’s thighs. “Are you holding back? Don’t.”

He smiled, raising his eyebrows as if saying so what? as his thumb kept moving, his middle and forefinger moving in and out of Astoria.

“You’re doing this on purpose.”

Milenko began kissing the line of their jaw towards their ear, speaking softly against its shell. “I burn with love, Astoria, I burn with love unto myself, and bury me in love.” 

“Bury yourself inside me, you bloody bastard.”

Milenko laughed. “Nice to know you’ve missed me too.”

“Show me how much you’ve missed me” Astoria said, voice soft, as they guided Milenko’s free hand over their heart, and they put their own over his.

Milenko loved being difficult when Astoria was impatient. This time, it could wait until the next. He missed them too much. 

Astoria was sitting on their lap, both of them naked over Astoria’s bed. Milenko kissed them again, putting one of his hands on the small of his back and the other in the middle of it. They guided Astoria over the bed, his arms caging their head now. 

Holding his weight on one arm, he hooked his thumb over their lower lip. “Guide me back to you, then, my sweetness.” 

Milenko let out a muffled groan when Astoria wrapped their hand around his cock, giving them as much space as he could so they could see what they were doing. Astoria angled their hips, Milenko’s eyes falling shut with the feeling of their warmth against the head of his dick. 

He sunk in slowly at first, giving Astoria a long, slow stroke and staying in place for a moment, savouring the feeling as Astoria hooked their legs around his hips, their heels against his back. 

He gave them a small kiss, keeping his forehead pressed against theirs for a while, and began moving. He didn’t keep the pace slow for long, longing himself to feel Astoria’s short nails dig into his back.

One of Milenko’s hands was nuzzled under the back of Astoria’s knee, his fingers digging into the back of their thigh, pulling them closer. He soon had to use both his arms for leverage so he could fuck Astoria as hard as they liked to. Or rather, to match how much he had missed them.

“Is this better, Baronet Canonanch?” He teased them, breathless but showing no signs of stopping soon.

“Yes,” Astoria replied, half word, half moan.

Nattie had pranced around their feet, weaving between Astoria’s ankles until they finally made their way down to the gardens and chucked the ball the first time out into the maze. So now they stood, boots kicked off into the grass and sleeves shoved up around their elbows, and whipped the ball off into the open field for Nattie to go tearing after as it bounced across the ground. 

They’d stood out there for a while, the sun traveling slowly through the sky and warming Astoria’s freckled cheeks until they realized with a start that they’d definitely been out there longer than the thirty minutes they’d intended. So when Nathaira came bounding back again, dropping the ball into Astoria’s waiting palm, they’d gone to put it away - relenting when Nathaira’s ears drooped and she let out a pitiful whine.”

“Alright, alright, one more throw and then we have to go find the fountain. It’d be rude to leave company waiting, and I’m worried I might have left him doing just that. 

“I was wondering if you’d forgotten about me.” 

Astoria paused and looked over their shoulder, lips pulling into a slightly sheepish smile as she spotted Milenko standing a little ways behind them - hands tucked loosely into his pockets a brow quirked to match his teasing tone. 

“Not at all. Though please tell me I haven’t kept you waiting, I’d feel absolutely terrible if I did.” 

“Oh, no, I’m actually a little early. I went by your office, but the librarian said you’d likely be down here.” Milenko took a few steps closer, extending a hand and gesturing toward the ball. “May I?”

Astoria nodded, chuckling as Nathaira bounded over to him and tried to snatch the ball from his hands before he had a chance to throw it. Milenko didn’t seem to mind - he gave her a quick scratch behind the ears before he pulled his arm back, whipping the ball down the field with enough force that Nathaira nearly fell over herself trying to chase it. 

“You’ve created a monster.” Astoria laughed, shaking their head slightly as they watched Nathaira disappear over the small crest of a hill. “She’ll beg you to throw that thing until your arm falls off.” 

“There are worse fates.” Milenko turned back to Astoria then, his hand falling loosely to his hip and opening his mouth to say something, then pausing when he noticed Astoria’s eyes had fallen very clearly onto the ground between his feet. 

“Milenko, are you going to introduce me to your friend?” 

He grinned as he looked down, reaching to scratch between Ursula’s ears where she sat between his knees. “Of course. You’ve heard of her, if I remember what you said you’ve learned from my uncle. This is Ursula.”

Astoria tried to contain their noise of absolute glee as they crouched down, digging in their pockets for a treat and waiting for Milenko to give them a nod of approval before offering it to the pup in question. 

“Such a bonnie little thing.” Astoria beamed as Ursula stepped forward, carefully taking the treat from their palm and happily munching away while Astoria reached up to scratch behind her ears. “Yes, you, you’re absolutely lovely, but I’m sure you know that, don’t you?”

“Oh, she does. I don’t let her forget it.” Milenko chuckled, something...soft, almost, visible in his face when Astoria looked up mid-scratch behind Ursula’s ears. Their eyes lingered on him a moment, then two, before their gaze fell back to meet the dog’s warm brown eyes where she looked up at Astoria from the grass. 

There was a long pause between them before Nathaira came barreling back, completely ignoring Astoria and bringing the ball directly to Milenko for another throw. He didn’t bat an eye, praising her before 

“I’ve been looking forward to this.” Astoria said after a moment, letting their hand fall away from Ursula’s fur and smiling a little as she trotted back toward Milenko to sit between his ankles. “It’s been a long few days. Exciting, surely, but long. Not every morning I get to piss off a foreign government - but being able to step away from my desk is a welcome distraction.”

Milenko raised a brow, clearly fighting back a look of amusement. “Things get tense in archaeology?”

With a laugh, Astoria shook their head, reaching for their boots and tugging them on as they spoke. 

“Not usually. I was sent a set of bones a few months ago on behalf of the Zadithian government, but I’m holding them hostage. I told them they’d get the bones back when they returned my original notes on a dig site I surveyed, but they’re claiming they own my originals since it was a private site - so no bones for them.” Astoria accepted Milenko’s outstretched hand, hauling themself to their feet and blowing a strand of hair out of their eyes. “Pissing contest, really, but I don’t bluff. I’ll keep their bloody bones until I’m dead if I have to.”

“Suddenly I see why you and my uncle get along.” Milenko chuckled, and Astoria nodded, hand slipping out of his as they turned to take the ball from a panting Nathaira and tucked it into their pocket. 

“Atanasie is a delight.” Astoria set a hand on their hip, tugging idly on the beaded chain of their glasses with the other. “But I digress. You came here to follow a creative train of thought, not for me to bore you with the details of my job.”

He smiled at that, shaking his head as he took a step closer and offered Astoria his arm. 

“Trust me, there is nothing you could possibly say that would bore me while in your company. However, I have much I wanted to ask you. Shall we?”

For a moment, they couldn’t tell if they were relieved or disappointed that they’d left their gloves on that day when they looked at the bare skin of his arm. His river-heart sang in their mind when it wandered, and they’d be lying if they weren’t wondering if it sounded as lovely the second time - but that could be answered another time. 

So they set their hand in the crook of his elbow, giving him a warm smile as they let him escort them toward the fountain a little ways away from the garden.