#midnight prose

i see you with her

you might be in love i hear

but where your skin touched mine; all those promises,

they are losing hope

i feel my heart strings begin to tear

reminding me of a frayed rope

you gave back my broken heart mended so terribly

life has a sense of irony

oh my darling your heart still remains with me

By,

But I will take it in stride.

I crack a half-hearted joke about eating the same food when we were on the way here now that we’re going again.

It works for a moment, and mom laughs.

Dad keeps sighing in annoyance or contempt, it makes me angry.

I'm waxing tragedies and laments in my head while we eat. Close to tears.

My aunt comes just at the right time,

I'm oddly dreadful of going home.

Then she remembers her blood-soaked hands.

A small tremor goes through her body as she starts through the hallway. It's cold. The temperature as well as the lighting. Cool hues of emergency exit signs are the only light source illuminating the concrete walls and cellar doors as she passes them one by one.

Saying she thinks she’s so smart

She’s trying to trick you

She won’t give you what you want without requiring something in return

You say she does not look as she should

She’s too big

Too loud

Too fierce

You cannot remold her into something that fits in your pocket

You cannot fit her with a leash and collar

You cannot make her a part of your life without changing something - or everything

You do not see her as a guardian, but a monster

Not a source of knowledge, but an abomination

To you, she is not a creature with purpose, but a distraction, a diversion, something to be overcome in order to conquer

You swear to your fellows, to your fathers, to your followers, that you will tame this beast

You will be triumphant

You will be victorious

You will knock her off her pedestal

You will put her in her place

Once you remove her, displace her, disgrace her, at last there will be room enough for you, you cry

You stubbornly refuse to turn your head and see

The empty, cracked, and lonely places that line the road behind you

The places your heroes and fathers once stood to face the monsters of their own

And beneath them

Lining the path to your victory

The shattered pieces

Of the sphinxes

Who came