#mhchc

I’ve been on her side during the divorce and lost all my admiration and respect for said comedian. I’ve been waiting for her autobiography restlessly since it was announced and now that I’m halfway through it I can’t stop thinking about how much he used and distorted the character of a struggling woman to make the world laugh.

I’m reading about what she was experiencing, with sh and depression, and the years coincide with the times he was making me laugh about her on tv and thinking wow, they are so happy! I want a love like this!

Or finding out how her Jewishness, which I thought was a huge part of her character from his comedy, is only cultural and religion is not something she’s particularly interested in?

I’m angry at men, as I often am, I’m angry at this particular man most of all.

I’m angry she didn’t get what she deserved from him, I’m angry he used her to make us laugh and I’m angry I did laugh.

I had a completely different expectation of who she was as a person, what her passions were, what she was doing with her life and that was because I was fed a men’a narrative of what her life was.