#metuant

   aaron warner & the complicated scale of sexuality ;; 

okay so i’ll start of by saying i believe he is demisexual. now i will jokingly refer to him as juliette/ellasexual since he has a particular bond and relationship with her that transcends my ability to properly word it.

  so basically - aaron isn’t against casual sex, in fact he makes sure that when he mentions his relationship with lena, he describes it as just physical.  this seems like a normal statement, okay fine. but i’ll take it a step further. aaron believes in taking good care of his body, this would include allowing the natural inclination for release and sex. threfore sex is usually without emotional intimacy for him. it’s simply something that his body needs to preform at it’s best. 

  furthermore - i do believe that this means that he is not heterosexual. i genuinely believe (albeit slowly), aaron could overcome the abuse by his father / the system he was raised in. keep in mind that this distrust is across both males and females. so for any relationship / intimacy to form ( emotional in particular ) he has to overcome this. 

this leads us to why i believe he’s primarily demi-romantic. juliette/ella. their bond has trascended anything that the highpowers have thrown at them. he has loved her for as long as he can remember and all the gaps inbetween. she is the only one who reaches through the trauma and the abuse and reaches him. jokingly he’s ella-sexual, but really. he’s demi-romantic/demi-sexual in the sense that loving her sets everything in the perfect order. 

   “ I have no idea what those are.” But he’s already decided to hate them until further explanation just on a whim. 

timeline meme / the timeline in which they gain everything they want, except for the thing they wanted the most.

This is why I always say the best case scenario for him is when he dies because even when he wins he loses. 

Edom is his Underworld. His home for the god that he becomes. Where the world can be built and destroyed by the flick of his hands. But it doesn’t matter, it would never have mattered without Clary by his side. It would never have mattered without Clary choosing to stay with him. 

Even if she had failed. 

Even if he had the chance or the foresight to prepare for her betrayal, in the end it wouldn’t have mattered. 

Because the only way he would ever win is if she loved him back, in every way that it mattered to him. Entirely and absolutely. Without space for anyone else because he’s selfish and he needs it. It’s the only thing that would satisfy him. 

And even, learning before the end, not to force it ─ he still rigged the table. He still played his chances into a corner. Because as long as he has to barter for it, for her affection, for her attention, he isn’t winning. 

But he doesn't.

He'd promised he wasn't going to try and be a hero. His days of war was behind him for now. All he had to focus on was getting home without attracting anyone's attention. He'd been pretty good at it so far. He moved around. Switching from one apartment to the next. Never staying for very long. Making sure no one would catch on when he says he's someone else when he isn't. He'd almost wondered if she'd even find him. His Father taught him all the best tricks of course, which always just meant he had to be one step ahead of them. Twist the game board around them whenever he can.

So instead of being further out of their reach, he's right in the middle of downtown. In the more obvious lower grade section of the residential section. The exact place people get lost and everyone stops looking. Always giving him just enough proximity to be close enough to her to know what the Re-establishment was up to but never too close that they know he's just right under their nose.

A quick look around and he forces through the door, drops the bag of food he'd gotten onto the table and took off his coat. It's worn and a little too thick for the season. It doesn't match the dirty pair of jeans he wore or the muddied boots that had scratches and scuff marks from the occasional chase. But there was still room for a gun at his side for easy rich as he catches her silhouette in the broken mirror hanging on a loose nail.  It wasn't his. He'd had no need for it since he ran off on his own. And he'd found it when he snuck into this empty room. But that's of no consequence to the gun now aimed at her head. His finger on the trigger.

/smothers you in every which way. I know you sent this ages ago, but you know what— bite me, ‘cause I always like to think it’s better late than never. Anyway, I hope that you realise that I’m going to return these in more ways than just one over-time, so I hope that you’re ready and won’t judge me too much. Even though I know that you will and that’s pretty a-okay in my book, ‘cause I’d say that a day without judgement from Tine is a boring as hell day.