#melada

Undersea Rockstar

Back in Quel’thalas, the main part of the journey home had been easy. It wasn’t until I stood outside the lounge, staring at the door that things felt difficult, overwhelming again. I found the key among the charms on my little chain but I couldn’t seem to put it into the lock. When I finally did, a familiar form was at my side, bloodthistle smoke in the air between us. “Chaszmyre,” Melada greeted me.

I probably jumped, just the idea of being caught returning, proof that I’d gone somewhere, was nerve-wracking. But this could’ve been just what I wanted, a distraction from all of it. In fact, I was grateful the first interaction I was going to have was anyone but Dylakend. It took a moment to remember how things had been left, the last time Melada had been at the lounge but I let her in all the same, quick to shut the door behind us.

"Waited? For how long?"

"An hour, maybe two? You okay? You seem.. off, and I hope it's not because I'm here?"

I suddenly felt clumsy and self-conscious, as if I was out of practice in lying and keeping secrets. I only had to remind myself the key was the foundation in truth.

“That sounds awkward. What I mean is, I had a commission in Dalaran. A portrait for a friend of a friend. Retirement, birthday...” Waving a hand dismissively helped me relax as I explained. "Some dignified special occasion. It paid well and it's nice to get myself out there for a wider variety of artistic achievements."

"Business, in Dalaran. So, out of town business," Melada repeated, offering a faint smirk. “But, good for you. You're quite the social butterfly these days.”

The smirk made it feel like I’d still made a mistake but I pushed on anyway.  "I'm trying to be. I've been, trying to respond to every invitation I get, just to get myself out there, the lounge. I suppose to, keep myself busy too."

All grounded in truth. I knew it would be hard, coming back from Pandaria with everything I’d heard and what more was to come. After Lordaeron, I knew that we weren’t safe in Quel’thalas, that there will be more. But I never thought I would be so tangled in it, not like this.

"I've taken it easy, just.. spent some time relaxing, thinking. Spent some time with Velannis and spent some time alone in an old hideout near the sea, clears my head and reminds me what it's like to be alone, truly alone. I had pushed a little too far with work, actually ended up in a real bad spot and got hurt very bad."

I focused on Melada’s story, rather than my own thoughts. She explained that it wasn’t in Zandalar or even Tirisfal that she’d gotten hurt but further south in Silverpine, worgen attack. 

"Do you, want a drink? I'm sure I've already bored you with my worgen story." That was one I was willing to tell, to talk about. A comfortable distraction. 

“Only if you think it's a good idea to serve me.”

“I, think tonight will be ok.”

“Well, alright then. I'll have what you're having.” Melada offered a faint smile.

"I, guess all this talk just makes me want to do something with my hands. Alright, and maybe also have a glass of wine or something,” I replied, doing just that with locating glasses.

“I can understand that.. I think I was drinking white last time? So let's do red and hope it has the opposite effect.”

I nodded and set to pouring two modest glasses, just in case, and moved toward the end of the bar where she sat. "What exactly would be the opposite effect?" I asked her, smiling playfully before taking a sip.

“Well, I may have been a bit hostile last time, aggressive, jealous that I wasn't getting more of your attention. I guess the short way of saying all of that is that I was acting like kind of a bitch? So, I'm trying to.. not be a bitch tonight. You know, talk with you and not fight and try to ruin your special night."

“I, can't escape all the blame, as much as I want to. You caught me off-guard, talking about those people, those times. So much I thought I'd forgotten or at least moved on from.”  Or that had moved on from me, for that matter. Aerion was as much a feature of that part of my life as Xin’thalore or anyone else.

"It sort of caught me off-guard too, the whole conversation started innocent enough and then, well, you know. Certain.. emotions triggered inside of me and I guess I just wanted you to tell me that you were on my side."

“I am, if it means anything now.”

Melada smiled at that, taking another sip from her glass before sighing. "Did you want me to tell you the full story? I suppose I owe it to you after making a scene over it."

I looked into my glass, twisting the stem in my fingers. It was another, easy enough distraction if she wanted to tell it. I never would, in her place.  "If you want to tell it. I know, it can be hard. I, have at least one I'll probably never tell."

If I was ever to be honest, I had a good number of stories I’d never tell. The days spent with Erickson, however many there were, his abuse that built on my aversion to magic, the reason I refused Light healing from Aerion when he found me, was something I would never even share with him, not even after all these years. Plenty of the time with Tyrimus was too much to remember, let alone repeat.

“It is hard.. I thought I'd moved past it but like I said, everything just caught me off-guard and knowing that you used to be involved with them back then, probably around the same time just made it feel.. fresh. But, um..”

After a moment she began, setting an all too familiar scene from the start. “I wanted Riavis to love me, it all started out willing enough. He was attractive, likable, well connected, seemed to take an interest in me.. we'd been together before that night, willingly.” 

The whole story, from start to terrible finish, reminded me of myself. I hadn’t experienced it all at once, and not with the same cast of people involved. Though, I had to wonder if that part was even true. Oriel had been as much a part of chapters I didn’t want to talk about of my own, as he seemed to have been in Melada’s story. One detail in particular, matched exactly. I was willing to admit he’d written up the papers at mine and Aerion’s request, to make sure I was formally separated from my youthful mistake of a marriage. But even Aerion never knew what else I’d asked of Lord Valadil, nor would he.

"It's hard to describe this feeling. I just don't know how you could've been done so wrong by people I... Xin'thalore is one thing, it's not like I haven't heard things about him. But Riavis? Light, Oriel? He arranged something so important to me at the time, took care of things I don't even like to remember myself."

That was a little too far and I paused, sighing and looking to Melada for a long moment. I did feel bad for her, and a little confused, at just how differently things had gone for us.  “It just seems so wrong. What is so different in us, you know?”

With a few tears and sniffles, a few rubs of her eyes to banish both, Melada continued after a shaky breath. “I’ve.. shed enough tears for a whole lifetime over this, maybe two. I've been done crying over this for a long time. You know, the priestess who did it, she threw it back in my face once and told me I bring out the worst in people. At times, I've thought it was true but that's just self pity. Sometimes, I think that I'm paying for past mistakes and every bad thing that happens, all the pain is just me atoning for the sins I've committed, both real and imagined but I know that's hawkstrider shit, too. Just, bad things happen to good people sometimes and good things happen for bad people, I've no control over it."

“That's evil. You can't be the one to perform the damn thing and act superior! Maybe I'm lucky I don't know who it was.” I shook my head and swished the wine in my glass again. "You're right though. It's all shit. You don't deserve any of that."

After a few more words on the topic, Melada had calmed down, tears and all coming to an end.

“I just, felt you deserved to know why I acted the way I did. Why what seemed like such a silly, stupid, random question about you helping people you haven't seen in years meant such a big deal to me. Like I said, I just really wanted -you- to be on my side. After saying it all out loud, I guess I was worried that somebody else would pick them over me again. Somebody I care about and trust.”

“I wouldn't. They're not, special to me, not friends. Oriel, did some things for me that I'm not even sure it's legal to pay him back for but that's all so long ago. The others are, just like you said.” With a small laugh, I shook my head, feeling relatively safe in what I’d chosen to reveal in sympathizing. "Idiots, if they're not smart enough to actually be malicious. Which most of them aren't."

Melada sniffled and smiled. "Thank you, Chasz. It means a lot. Can you forgive me?" she asked hesitantly.

"Easily." I answered, pushing my glass away.

“Thank you, for understanding and being here. It means a lot to me.”

“It sounds cheesy to say you'd do the same for me but I think you would.”

When she agreed, it got us talking about Bronvys, that night around this time, a few years ago. She’d stood in between us, while I was between him and Keleros. It was so needlessly dramatic and felt like a turning point with Bronvys and I, like our friendship was never the same after that. We hadn’t spoken in so long, it was hard to imagine if he thought of me as a friend still, or at all. 

"Of course he'd remember you but.. I think we've spent enough time in the past for one night, if that's okay with you, Chasz."

I couldn’t keep the laugh from slipping out. It was all too much really, her past and mine, how they lined up. Even more so, how those lines and ties led back to both Aerion and Bronvys, and doubled back to the two of us. Maybe worse too, that I now had one of those strings wrapped around me again, pulling me into the past too. When I agreed, things took an even more unexpected turn.

“Would I be pushing my luck if I said maybe a kiss to make the wound feel better?”

"Maybe a little,” I answered, the shift bringing another small laugh from me. “And here I thought you were done trying to get kisses from me."

Melada planted her elbows on the bar and leaned forward. "When did I ever say I was done?"

“I don't know, throwing money at me usually signals the end of being interested.”

“I mean, the money was more aimed at him than you. Though I'm sorry about the poor stool too, it didn't do anything to deserve that.”

My stomach turned at the mention of Dylakend, reminding me of the recent past and what I’d been told- what I’d promised I’d do. I started to mention it, or something about him but I think Melada misunderstood, thought I was talking about her and I. After a few moments, it didn’t matter anymore. She said something about our separate lives and in spite of agreeing to leave the past for the night, I was drawn back there again. Back to that very same point in time we’d been in most of the night. When I’d first returned from Kalimdor, when it felt like I was living three or four lives at once.

"I wanted to give you some space and that's over and done with, we're both here now. May I come closer and kiss you?"

"Only if you want to be disappointed later," I answered wearily. It was wrong, to say yes even with a warning. What did it matter? Separate lives.

"You told me to enjoy the moment with you," she replied. "And despite getting all teary eyed over something that happened a long time ago, I'd say tonight went better than I expected and you weren't upset with me like I thought you'd be. So, now, I'd like this night to end how I thought the last one would."

With that, she took the kiss and I didn’t resist. "You asked for it." An easy, comfortable distraction.

“Well, I was going to be content with just cuddling and kissing tonight, if that's not too greedy." Leaning close, she added in a whisper, “I’ve missed you.”

Chaszmyre looked to Melada and picked up her glass. "If there's been a night for toasting, we found it."

Melada reached out to clink glasses with Chaszmyre. "To a very successful night for your business, my dear friend. We're almost four hours in, you know."

Conversation continued both at the bar and beyond it in tables within the Peacock Lounge.

Chaszmyre nodded and tipped her glass to Melada's. "Thank you for being here," she added before taking a sip. "I hadn't even noticed how long it'd been..."

Melada sipped from her wineglass. "Well, you've been busy. Very busy," she said, waving the woman closer to whisper something before pouting afterwards. “Too busy to notice my dress. I never wear dresses”

Chaszmyre turned back with a freshly filled mug, eyeing Melada for a long moment. "I bet that dress would look nice on my floor, for five minutes," she remarked with a smirk and looked to the unfamiliar patron to hand off his drink.

Melada rolled her eyes. "Oh, shut up. The men are the five minute wonders, not me."

The proprietress shrugged. “Seemed like a pretty broad statement to me,” she shot back with a playful smirk.

“Just tell me I'm pretty, would you? It's been weird not having a gun or pants tonight,” Melada grumbled.

As the owner, fellow artist, and her friend spoke, conversation rose from the tables as well. 

“You blew up an airship?” Halanth was asking. “Hal! I blew up - ok, technically yes,” admitted Mourne. "My airship, but we had to,” his wife Zozha added.

“Part of me has been antsy hoping to shoot something all night. The other part doesn't want to ruin your good night,” Melada added after a sip from her third or fourth glass of wine.

Chaszmyre eyed Dylakend's glass a moment before pushing her wine glass his way. "Or do you want another in place of all the stolen sips?" she offered sheepishly.

"I can make do with another, sure,” he answered, flashing her a smile from across the bar.

The oblivious and loudly flirting pair at the bar finally took their wobbly leave and Melada expressed her relief in similar fashion. “Thank the Light.. seriously, did you actually like that guy's accent? It was obnoxious.”

Chaszmyre scoffed at Melada as she took her wine back from Dylakend, pouring him his own new drink instead- the specialty ice tea. "I happen to enjoy all sort of, exotic things, Melada," she answered with a smirk. 

“Exotic? The only thing exotic about that man was the venereal diseases he's picked up on his travels. Otherwise, I've seen his kind before,” Melada replied, still entirely not amused with the man.

“No, I don't know,” Chaszmyre continued. “I knew a guy once that ran with an old…”  She waved dismissively at relationship titles and their ilk. "Whatever. They did Row Rat shit together and he sort of talked like that. Called me ‘dove’. I think that's where I picked it up honestly."

“Are you talking about.. the guy with the gun?“ Melada asked, her wine glass pushed suddenly almost out of reach. “What was his name.. Mercutio?”

“Does anyone need any refills, while I am here? Or more food?” Halanth’s voice rang from the tables, cutting through the steadily more uncomfortable quiet that settled around the bar.  “If something is wrong, it is Chaszmyre's fault,” he added, joking with the patrons. 

“Yeah, actually. I didn't think I knew anyone who knew that crew. It's been a long time," Chaszmyre mused, one hand still trailing instinctively up to run her thumb across the cheekbone on her scarred side. She quickly dropped the hand and sipped more wine.

“Do we need to just have a sign drawn up that says ‘If there's a problem with the food, blame Chasz’?” Dylakend asked toward the last table. Halanth replied without turning. "Yes. Make that sign."

At the bar, Melada frowned, her eyes on the bar rather than the woman behind it. "Yeah, I wish I didn't have the.. 'pleasure' of knowing that crew but I do. He called everyone dove and I think knowing the connection now will make me throw up in my mouth a little bit every time you say it."

Chaszmyre shrugged off the last remark easily, adding, "I could say the same though, I guess. Lot of scars from running with them."

"I've found that a lot of times, not all of the time, but a lot of the time... 'dove' is an affectation used for someone when you are 'familiar' with so many people that you can't be bothered to remember names,” Dylakend added after another thoughtful sip of his drink.

“..You worked with them?” Melada asked hesitantly, her eyes back on the dark-haired woman.

“Yeah. My b-” Chaszmyre eyed Dylakend a moment before continuing, maybe a little quieter. "I was in a gang, for a while, when I first came back to Quel'thalas. We, allied with DoA. I did a couple jobs for Xin'thalore to, sort of seal the deal."

Melada's eyes narrowed as she visibly tensed up. “Xin'thalore was a name I'd hoped to never hear again.”

“I've heard that about him but, he was never anything but fair and appropriate with me. But, his job is how I ended up getting burned.”

“Fair and appropriate are not words I would use to describe that animal,” Melada snapped. “Tell me, did you also know a Riavis?”

Chaszmyre tipped her head after another sip of wine. "Yeah, rented an apartment from him. I'm not even sure how we were introduced anymore."

Melada wordlessly stared at her for a long moment; if looks could kill, Chaszmyre would be dead.  “And do you hold any loyalties to those people anymore? Would you help them if they asked?”

"Well, Adokul and I had a, complex friendship. After all that Row stuff, we were under Sunshield together. I don't know, that whole scene, those people are a whole lifetime ago, it feels like. So I guess short answer, wait what was it? Would I help them?”

“...Oohhh, Sunshield. That is a name I have not heard in a while,” Mourne remarked from the last table, reminding those at the bar they were not alone, nor unheard.

“If those people walked in right now and asked you for help, would you help them?”

“Which ones specifically? Xin'thalore?”

"Xin'thalore, Riavis.. I could care less about Mercutio, he's just a lackey with a severe speech impediment.”

Chaszmyre shrugged. "I don't know. Why are you so worked up about this? I worked and played with Xin and Ado, Mercutio. I rented an apartment with Riedra from Riavis. It's not like I screwed him. He seemed, pretty busy in that area when we knew each other anyway."

Melada stepped around the bar and stared down at the shorter woman, fists clenched and eyes wide. She spoke lowly.  “Because you’re telling me you were friends with my rapist.”

Chaszmyre blinked and took a swift step away, keeping her back foot poised for more movement. "I don't know anything about that," she hissed, charcoal brows narrowing at the hostile posturing. "They were my friends, before I knew you. Before I even knew Any and all of that-" she shook her head, another, smaller step back.

Melada didn't advance as Chaszmyre backed up and instead reached for her wineglass, finishing what was left in one gulp. "Doesn't answer the question. Would you help them now if they asked you?"

“I don't know Melada!”

“Even after I told you that, you still might?”

Chaszmyre threw her hands up. "It depends on what they wanted! I mean, whichever one of those people on that list is the main one you hate, I can give a quick and easy 'no', he's out. I'm not going to just tell you with no damn context that I'd immediately throw out people that I went through a lot with, years ago, because that might be a lie and I prefer to craft those intentionally.”

"Riavis is the one but Xin'thalore is no better. The cruel things I've seen him do to people..”

Chaszmyre glanced briefly to Dylakend and the group beyond before lowering her voice and hands once more. "Look, this is entirely not the place or time for that. I don't know what's gotten into you but my guess is something grape based and that's my fault."

Melada took in a deep breath and stepped back, setting the empty wineglass back down on the bar as she relented. "No, I suppose this isn't the time nor place for this," she agreed, glancing briefly at Dylakend with narrowed eyes before turning her attention back to Chaszmyre.