Here you stand before me. Broken in all your glory.
Pairing: Tfp Megatron x Reader
Song: Iridescent - Linkin Park
Warnings: Thoughts of self worthlessness. Tw(Suicid!l thoughts.) Self doubts. And a whole lotta angst.
An: So uh... This was a dream I had a while ago. What caused it? Idk. But I figured maybe someone would be able to find something out of it. I'm not entirely happy with the ending so I would appreciate any feed back you guys have with this one.
The world is a cruel place. That is one constant given to you throughout your life.
Time after time you have had the few good things in your life ripped away. Leaving you with nothing more than your bleeding heart in your hands.
It seemed as if the more you gave away the more hurt you received.
Your ex had been given your heart. He took it. Along with another's. They. They were never faithful. Never had a reason to be. You were never the best significant other. Although you did try. You remembered all the birthdays, anniversary's. You made them dinner every night and planned dates they would like every Friday.
You just.
You couldn't do this anymore.
You've given to much of yourself away to even recognize yourself. To many missing puzzles pieces to even figure out what the original art was supposed to be.
It also didn't help with your parents disappointment. They always joked about you moving to the beat of your own drum but when the time came for you to truly make a decision for yourself, the criticized you for it. The job may not be the most high paying but still.
It was the one dream you held into to keep going all those years.
And they picked it apart like a vulture to a carcass. Leaving nothing left but bare bones with nothing to support themselves with.
You've tried. Oh god have you tried.
You've seen therapists and Doctors since the age of 14. Multiple disorders caused by a number of things. Depression being number one. Something your mother and father never understood. Felt like it wasn't something you could have.
"Your given everything. Food. A roof over you head! And a loving family. You really think you have any reason to be depressed!"
Your uncle was your closest friend. He understood. The only one who could until it took him in the end. Here. On this very bridge. Where you are now. A bottle of liquor in one hand. Occasionally spilling over the edge in memory of the one closest to you. And a cigarette in the other hand.
You always figured one if them would kill you before you did it yourself.
Yet here you were. Contimplating the unthinkable.
You tried to make things work. Tried to peace together the broken bridge between you and your parents. Tried to involve cousins and friends in the things that you did. That they did. And everytime you got pushed back into your little corner.
They didn't care. Made fun of you for the ticks and bugs in your genetic makeup. As if you chose to be this way.
"Fucking bastards. The lot of them." Tears spilled down your cheeks and angrily, you brush them away.
You take a drag from the cigarette. Smoke curling deep in your lungs before spilling past your lips and into the cool morning air.
Wet asphalt and dirt filled your nose. The river, one of the few in Jasper, roared beneath you.
You felt selfish for even thinking about doing this. Selfish and foolish.
You take a drink and pour some out for your uncle. The liquor burns all the way down. Filling you with a false warmth that your so desperate for.
A warmth you have yet to find.
The bottles finished. So is the cigarette. You stuff the butt into the bottle and throw it next to your bike. A piece of paper flutters in the wind. Stuck to your bike by the key in the ignition.
A final, fuck you, to your family. And that your aunt, married into the family by your uncle, gets everything that you have. From the lint under your bed to the 500 year old vase you got as a gift from an old lady who thought that it would make you happy.
Your body shakes as you clamber up and over the railing. Adrenaline pumps through your viens.
The wind blows the fabric of your jacket around you. The leather you used to protect you on the road would have no use here.
Your eyes glue themselves to the river. Turning dark water over itself. The river was full to bursting from the rain last night.
Your hands feel ice cold as you grip the railing.
"Fuck." If you were going to do this you had to do it now. Before some poor passerby catches you.
You lean forward.
Finger tips brush stone.
Weightless.
Then nothing.
.
.
.
"Are you foolish human? Or missing a few wires in your circuitry." It's was unlike any voice your heard before.
Your eyes open. Now miles high above the bridge.
"What in the world." Your hands brush along metal. You were uncased in it. The world burs together as your brought up higher. Now held by the back of your jacket.
A silver face, scared and scowling, fills your vision. Red eyes look through you. Tearing apart every inch of who you were.
Despite the clothes you felt awfully naked before. Him? Ya. Him.
"Are you deaf as well?" You scowl at him. Heart pounding in your chest as you reach your hands to warp around what your assuming is his fingers.
You don't even cover half of one with you hands.
"No. And who the fuck are you?" You could feel the alcohol warming your cheeks.
"Megatron, human. Cybertronian. And you should learn some manners. Lest you find yourself hurt." You laughed at that.
"Really? You see me trying to toss myself over a bridge and you tell me to be careful? That's like telling someone whose already been stung not to stick their hand into the hornets nest." The giant laughed. Then sat you on the billboard near the bridge.
It was advertising some kind of toothpaste. Bright white smiles plastered all over.
"Tell me human? Why." His fingers curl over one end of the billboard.
"My name is y/n." You cross your arms. "And why do you care. Obviously we don't know each other. Because trust me. I would remember making friends with what I can only assume is a giant alien robot." Megatron laughs. His teeth were sharp you noticed.
"Alien indeed human. And I need no reason to ask you. Perhaps it's for my own vulgar curiosity. Maybe it's a genuine concern. Either way. I will find out." His face was barely touching yours before he pulled back. You take your time to answer. Finding your carton of now slightly bent cigarettes and lighting one.
"I was trying to kill myself." Blatant and to the point.
"Why?"
"Why do you care? Honestly. Not even my own mother cares as she's the one that fucking made me." Megatron tilts his head. You would almost call it cute if the man hadn't looked like he crawled out of some horror movie reject list.
"Because I have seen many where you are now. Beaten and broken." His voice rumbles. Sounding like turning thunder. "I have seen people akin to gods and kings take their life because it felt as if though it was the only way out for them. So beaten by the very people who they called friends they were a shell if their former selfs." He watches as you smoke. Spilling clouds past your lips.
He looks at you. Truly at you. Unlike anyone else. He sees the dark circles under your eyes. Your eyes that had lost their shine long ago. He sees your body curling into itself. As if the very weight I'd the world was pushing you down.
Everyone else saw you as some broken thing to long gone to be fixed.
Megatron saw more.
It was the way your body still tried to carry itself as if it were still in it's glory. He could see strength. Both physical and metaphorical in it. The squaring of your shoulders as you glared up at him. They way you portrayed calm despite the subtle shouting of your heart saying other wise. It was in your head. Still held high as if you were willing the crown to stay one. Define written in every part of you to stay alive. Despite the fact your mind is screaming otherwise.
And he told you exactly that.
"Here you stand before me. Broken in all your glory. Is this truly what you want? What you crave? You are young still. Is death truly what you want?" He was to your level again. Hardly disturbed by the smoke spilling past your lips. "Do you truly wish to prove everyone right? That you were always doomed to die a disappointment. To never become who you are. A ruler in your own right."
His lips curl back.
"Live human. Despite what you want. Live." He picks you up and deposits you back down next to your bike. Your neck aches as you crane your head upwards to look at him.
"I am coming back here in three months of your earth time. Expect you back here alive." What the fuck was he gonna do if you were dead?
Something split the air beside him. Arcs of light split off of it. He watches you even as he leaves. Head never turning to look away until his body has disappeared. The vortex closes.
Your body collapses.
Your hands shake and your cigarette falls from your lips.
You have no idea what just happened.
Were you already dead? And this some sick form of limbo? You grab the cigarette and jam the still burning tip into your wrist. Air hisses between your teeth.
No. You definitely felt that.
"Broken. In all your glory. Huh."
Three months wasn't that long. And honestly, if living out of spite was something you were gonna do at least it would be in line with how you did everything else.
"Megatron." The word felt foreign on your lips. You will see him again. Something deep inside told you. And in three month your life would take a monumental turn.
Your bike roared. The paper fluttered to the ground.
Despite everything.
One person did care.
Or at least cared enough to try.
