It's just so hard...
So hard to fight against the darkness creeping up around me...
I had gotten so used to the happiness I had... The pure joy you give me...
But now you're not here.. You can't help me... I can't help you...
How come everything..everyone wants to see us crash and burn? Why? What have we ever done?
A few little things here and there...but nothing no one else has ever done... Right?
But then why do they hate you so? Put you through this pain? Make you feel worse when your face is already in the dirt?
Why do they hurt you?
Why do the people rip off my necklaces? Laugh in my face and toss them to the ground?
Why do the females start rumors about me? Why do they call me fat..ugly...
I know I don't do the best in relationships... but now that I'm happy everyone's telling me it's wrong...telling me to go before it's too late...
But if this isn't love...
If having someone call you at night just to hear your voice...having them want to come see you a minute after they leave...
If having someone who cares about me... Who I believe loves me as much as I love him, if not more, is so wrong that I should leave...
Then what's love?
Is it screaming at someone and making them feel terrible because you only want them to be friends with people you approve of?
Is it hiding away in your room, laughing and picking on other people when really all you want to do is go hug them?
Is it fucking because you're so angry about something no one can control, but you have to release your anger somehow so you ask her to do it rough?
Is it lying...telling so many stories that when everyone comes together at once you just scream and run away?
Is that what love is?
If thats what love is I've had it before...
And I cried everynight she was away from me because I didn't know how to leave without her make me feel like the bad guy...
But if all those things aren't love...
Then what is?
Shouldn't it be defined by the person you are? By who you're with?
Not by race, gender, age, personality...or by your past...
It should be defined by you...
Defined by every single one of us
Not by some man on a computer typing away trying to make money...
Not by some girl with bright pink hair tweeting about her life...
Not by your parents...trying to control their baby girl..make it so she never leaves...
No. It should be defined by us. By each and everyone of us. Everyday it should change.
It should never be the same.
Because everyday you grow wiser, everyday you fall harder in love, or move away from it.
Love is not something you can type into a computer, put in a post or a tweet.
It's not something you can explain to someone, though you can try your hardest...
Its something you have to go through...something you have to find out for yourself...
And when I die..I hope a tear falls down my face because I'm sad to leave my love behind, but so happy because I know I'll see them again.
