#materials manager

Me: Hey, Rob, at some point today can you bring the dead tree from next door over here?

Materials Manager: You just want the pot, don’t you?

Me: It’s $50 to get a pot that nice, of course I’m stealing it.

Materials manager: Why isn’t the receptionist asking for this?

Me:…do you want the nice version or the mean version?

Materials Manager: Huh. Well. Nice? You’re usually pretty nice about how you ask for things, and I want that to continue.

Me: Right, so. Basically the receptionist is a really sweet lady but I’m hardcore judging her for not knowing your name already and it makes me not like her.

Materials Manager: OOHhh, shaddup kiddo. Stop gettin’ mad about stupid shit. I’ll be over there in 20 minutes. You want a big pile a dirt just like last tim?

Me: Yes, please. Thank you, sir.

So, Head Plumber has not been fired! On the other hand, the utility company that my company is a subcontractor of, called today. About gas meters that were issued to us, and then installed with no paperwork to indicate the change submitted.

This is a big deal because of all the snow storms recently...customers are getting estimated bills instead of actual usage bills, and there’s no way to track anything with out paying a licensed, unionized plumber $39.80 an hour to go check each individual meter.

There were over 15 addresses that were like this, with at least 30 more that could potentially be similar.

So any way...long story short, Head Plumber and Materials Manager print everything off and never throw paper work away, and after thirty minutes of digging through old meters, a literal box of paperwork, and combing through the new meter cage...it’s not our fault.

We did literally nothing wrong, because the utility company assigned a bunch of meters to our meter cage with out any proof of purchase, proof of receipt, or bill of lading.

Head Plumber summed it up quite well.

So my Aunt (mom’s sister) aquired a dog without realizing it was pregnant.

Basically a family friend was working full time and going to school full time, both at and for becoming a vet and couldn’t afford to keep the dog, and didn’t realize that the unfixed dog next door was male...that, or thought the fence was secured, we aren’t sure which. Either way, she couldn’t afford to get her own dog fixed, or couldn’t get time off for one of those free spay/neuter events. In the last two years.

Anyway, Aunt is offering the puppies to people that family knows personally on the condition that the new owner pays for all of the vaccinations/spay/neuter stuff, researches and has a brand of food picked out, etc.

Youngest Sister, FaceTimes me while I’m at work: PUPPIES ARE HERE!!! (It’s literally just a shot of puppies that have just been born.)

Me:*grabs my work phone before I barge into Shop Foreman’s office* Puppies are here!!! *shove my personal phone at him while I dial Materials Manager, who picks up on the first ring* My sister is FaceTiming me the puppies being born right now!!! Get over here!

Materials Manager: I actually just pulled up, give me thirty seconds. *hangs up on me and comes barreling into Shop Foreman’s office about 45 seconds later*

Aunt: So this one with the white yarn was the first one born, but Willow was freaking out and thought she had to go potty at two in the morning. So this one should definitely have a poo related name.

Shop Foreman: I WANT THAT ONE.

Materials Manager: I want the runt, they’re always the biggest sweethearts.

Youngest Sister: I already called dibs on the runt!

Materials Manager: *to me* Is she as easy to bribe as you are?

Me: Bacon, drum stuff, high end dairy free chocolate, and any kind of gummy candy.

Materials Manager: No suran wrap? I’m surprised.

Youngest Sister: IS THAT THE GUY WHO GIVES YOU SURAN WRAP FOR BURRITOS?

Me: Yes? Fuck. MY CAR IS OFF LIMITS!

Shop Foreman: *after he’s done cackling, and my sister has traded her dibs on the runt for three industrial rolls of suran wrap* To be fair, you’ve had this coming for a while, now.

Aunt: You really have. Anyway- *she talked for a good ten minutes about the birthing, the mom and dad dogs, medical conditions that she knows about, etc.*

Materials Manager: Hey, you saw that email this morning, right? About the materials coordinator position?

Me, jokingly: Are you sniping me?

Materials Manager: Well...the position is all about tracking shipments and, y’know, paperwork stuff. Which you know I hate.

Me: So basically you told your boss no enough times that he created a separate position for you.

Materials Manager: Yeah, pretty much. I really just want a female in there who does the computer stuff, like tracking shipments and delivery; we can train a girl to work a forklift, but you can’t always get a forklift operator who knows spreadsheets.

Me: If it pays more than $15 an hour there’s gonna be a blood bath in the billing department.

Materials Manager: Why?

Me: Have you listened to them complaining?

Materials Manager: I don’t go out on smoke breaks with them, so no.

Me: You should warn HR Lady that you put the bug in my ear. No, I’m serious. Call her right now and report your self before this gets worse. I’m gonna start texting the girls as a forewarning.

Materials Manager: So. Uh. You can’t store the fire extinguishers here.

Me: These ones? The ones we hand out to the crewmen for their trucks? The ones you dropped off on Friday?

Materials Manager: The ones you bet me a dollar that you wouldn’t end up in charge of. Yes.

Me: This sounds like a Mike problem.

Materials Manager: Who?

Me: Mike, the safety director that yelled at me last week for chasing down stray dogs.

Materials Manager: The guy who chased you down in a company truck?

Me: Yup.

Materials Manager: Huh. Well, you still owe me a dollar. So, uh.

Me: How many printers have you had to fuck with in the last six months?

Materials Manager – Creact Testing Center

Job Details: Marketing Logistics & Supply Chain It is with great enthusiasm that I submit my application for the position. As a Masters dgree with over 16 years’ experience, I know my diverse skills and qualifications will make me an asset to the company. As my CV shows, I am a MCS graduate studied in PIMSET University, I am highly motivated to fulfill a challenging career. I have also completed…

Materials Manager – Waterford Group – Woodbridge, ON

Major Responsibilities:

Determines and/or assists in schedules required to produce customer product within negotiated timelines using computerized system (MRP) and Lean Methods for the Materials Department. Meets all operational targets and metrics (People, Quality, Delivery, Financial) Oversees the consistent flow of raw material and Maintenance Operating components to Production Department…