Hi! First of all, I LOVE your meta <3 Second, I just rewatched 4x21, when Sam is detoxing from demon blood and he hallucinates Mary telling him that he was right in drinking the blood to become stronger to end the apocalypse. In light of the real Mary we got to know this season, I think he may not have been hallucinating this at all, or at least that's what the real Mary would have said too. What are your thoughts on that? ^^
HA! Oh gosh, yeah, every memory of Maryā even the imaginary onesā just keep bringing the pain. :P
I definitely think it was a hallucination. I mean he hallucinated Alastair torturing him, himself as a kid berating him for all of his life choices before conceding that he was justĀ ātaintedā and really didnāt have a choice. And then Mary appears.
Dean had locked him up. Dean didnāt trust him. Bobby had helped. Bobby didnāt trust him, either. But Sam truly believed he was doing the right thing. Sam had spiraled down as low as he could on the self-hate scale, and he expectedĀ āMaryā to confirm it all, butā¦ She tells him heās doing the right thing. Not only that, she tells himĀ āDean is weakā for trying to stop him.
He thinks killing Lilith will STOP the apocalypseā¦ so in essence Mary telling him to kill her toĀ āmake my death mean something,ā it really takes on a whole new level of chilling here. Because Mary died so that Azazel could bleed in his mouth and make him the perfect instrument to kill Lilith to free Lucifer, and then to become the perfect vessel FOR Luciferā¦ is that reallyĀ what the real Mary would want her death to mean?
I mean, I know she didnāt know that when sheād made her deal, but in hindsight, thatās the implication of hallucination Mary there.
But at that point SAM believed that only he had the power to kill Lilith, because heād put his trust in Ruby. Heād been manipulated into believing that killing Lilith would STOP the apocalypse, not START itā¦
And now that weāve gotten to know Mary (and really, we shouldāve assumed some things about the kind of hunter she was from looking at the hunter who RAISED herā¦ because Sam knows more about SAMUEL than heād ever known about Mary until she came back in s12 and heās been learning for himself.
But I think heās starting to see the similarities, and I can only hope heās shuddering at Maryās casual acceptance of the MoLās plans that look terrifyingly similar to his missions with Samuel back in s6. I mean, the only reason Sam had thought there was nothing wrong with the Campbell familyās hunting style is because heād literally HAD NO SOUL AT THE TIME.
And Dean recognized how horrifying all of this was in 6.07:
Dean: And why? And did it ever occur to you that this is really shady?Sam: Heās our grandfather.Dean: Yeah. Yeah, a guy who talks a great game. But you canāt assume that family means the same thing to him as it does to us. Heās not Dad. Wow. You donāt see it, do you?Sam: What?Dean: Youāve got no instinct. [Scoffs] I mean, you are seriously messed up.Sam: Thanks.Dean: Iām not kidding, man. Nobodyās forcing you to work with me, okay? But if we do thisā¦ I drive the bus, I call the shots, and you tell me everything, whether you think itās important or not, because ā trust me ā you canāt tell the difference. Or, you know what, go ā go with Samuel. See how that goes. Itās up to you.
And then right after this, weāre led to BELIEVE that Sam went back to work with Samuelā¦ but really he was following Deanās script. Because even SOULLESS he understood that Dean had the right instinct here. He trusted Deanās assessment of the situation, and then worked from INSIDE to discover what Samuel was really up toā¦ uncovering a lot of the shadiness in s6 (but not quite all of it).
But since s12 is working on a different schedule, and not linearly retreading all the points of s6 in order, Sam and Dean are already a few steps ahead of that first discovery in 6.07. Which is interesting.
And I kinda went way off on a tangent here >.>
