#marceebeans

and so i decided to write this little blog about it. I came to london not knowing anyone on the program, i took a leap going to a foreign country for five months not knowing anyone. It has been an amazing experience. I met a lot of awesome people, made some new friends for when im back at school, talked to a lot of crazy brits and drank a lot (and by a lot i mean, A LOT, but its legal here so thats good) I also learned a lot about myself and who I am as a person. I decided to say yes instead of no and to not be afraid to try new things, or things i had previously blocked myself from doing whether from lack of confidence or it being out of my comfort zone. I have decided to do more things out of my comfort zone, it may be uncomfortable but youll love the stories after. I promise. Ive also learned a lot about myself and who I am as a person and what makes me happy, along with what i need to be happy. Im more okay with being alone, and doing things alone. Sometimes its nice to go out to dinner alone or watch a movie alone and just appreciate yourself. I also realized I want to get in better shape but not for anyone, for myself. I spent a lot of this semester on myself and im okay with that. I do not regret anything that i have done this semester, only not doing more. Do more, figure out what makes you happy and don't be afraid to do it. Be embarrassing. Look like a fool. Appreciate your surroundings. Tell those you care about, that you care about them.  A lot of this semester has been amazing, but ill also mention the less amazing parts. I was and still am 90% sure one of my flatmates hates me. I don't really know why, but i decided to make sure that i didnt let her get me down. Don't let others make you feel inferior, everyone has enough issues you dont need others to cause even more. Halfway through the semester I had to come home due to the death of my grandmother, mama. She was an amazing lady and I love her with all my heart, although going home was not ideal, it was something I had to do and I almost feel like since ive been here i havent acknowledged the loss as much as I should have. I didnt want my last 6 weeks here to be me moping around the flat and to not do anything, but it certainly was not easy. I am a little worried about going home because of that. The whole week the house was full of people so it didnt feel as empty but I know once my parents are at work and im home alone it will be a little tough. Which is why a part of me is glad I wont be living at home this summer.