#manic vent

SOMEHOW DESPITE LOSING MY @#)$ I MADE SENSE OUT OF THIS.

[[My "LoveLetter" AU interpretation of Spamton's situation shortly after making "the deal" with the "phone entity."]]

It was 1992.

Spamton, still a White Addison, was shown proof of the phone entity's "Absolute Certainty," a power he claimed to possess that accurately predicted the future 100% of the time. He showed proof of this by telling Spamton to call a specific number to pitch an item to, and after following his exact instructions, the sale closed without a hitch. He chalked it up to coincidence, but after a similar success with an e-mail sale, Spamton could no longer deny that there was merit to this man's power... And so, Spamton signed the deal to have the phone entity work as a permanent advisor and business partner for absolutely no commission fee and with the promise of transforming him into a BIG SHOT, one the likes of which Cyber World had never seen before.

I spent nearly 12 @#$%ing HOURS in DARKNESS. Yes, that's right, FELLAS. The power on the entire block DIED just before midnight! That means I didn't get a chance to celebrate it with my friends, family, or anyone really because I had to conserve all power left on my phone just in case of an emergency.

I LAUGHED SO HARD the moment it went out. Just unmitigated, [[MANIA]]CAL LAUGHTER.

My mother asked, "Are you okay?!"

I said, "YES. I'm fine. HEAEHAEHA! This is just SO FUNNY. A blackOUT on NEW YEARS! HAHAEHAEAHA!!! What a way to start THE YEAR!"

I drank one of my meal supplements to keep going, spent some time writing on my Alphasmart NEO, and then at dawn, after I failed to go back to sleep, I took one of those mini camping "stoves," fought with some matches, and warmed up a kettle full of water to eat some [[JAPAN imported]] noodles and drink chamomile tea to ease my mania-driven nerves.

BOY HOWDY was the [[EYE]] STATIC BAD. It always gets worse in darkness. Too many things firing off in my brain, I guess! Genuinely looked like a TV. COOL.

WELL, WELL HAPPY NEW YEARS to everyone else who wasn't in DARKNESS.

Despite all this CRAP I have a very, very good feeling for this year. I've never been so motivated! 😃

I can't share any details about my enthusiasm... Y'all have to see as the days pass. HEHE. 😁😁😁

I had almost two days without any power, putting my aquariums at risk since no power = no heat. It's the middle of WINTER, and the entire grid here failed, leaving almost a million people without any power. I managed to keep the tanks at stable levels by using candles to heat them from below and providing warm water to raise the temperature. My pufferfish weren't so lucky, though, and all they could do was just to keep as still as possible since their tank had no way of heating from below. I'm really @#$%ing glad they pulled through.

My birds, especially the youngest, which are just barely over a month old, were so cold that they needed two sheets to keep them warm.

Thunder blared, and hail pounded the house. My cats hid from the noise, and I bundled up in my bed, staring into pitch-blackness and seeing nothing but static.

I found out you can toast bagels on a pan over an open fire if you have a lid to heat the top. Wowee. Nice.

Since I had @$%^ all to do, I finally got my eyes examined for my visual snow (aka static vision) and got a mild prescription. The optometrist said that she doesn't know what's causing the [visual distortions] since my eyeballs are apparently "very healthy" but believes it's a neurological problem tied to my optic nerves. She tried to see if she could minimize it with lenses, but it didn't work, and she genuinely looked crestfallen for me. [[Heaven]] help me.

I used up all my backup chargers, so I had to go to @#%^ing McDonald's, of all places, to charge my phone. After waiting until it was around 80%, I decided to get something to eat, and when I put it on the windowsill behind me while it was charging. I wasn't aware that the windowsill's surface was slightly curved, so my phone fell to the floor. This was only a small drop or only a little over a foot, but that McDonald's floor must have poor impact control because that #$%^^$()^ BROKE MY PHONE. The screen is now unresponsive, and I was told my warranty only covers some of it, but I would still need to pay a $100 deductible to get it replaced. When I saw that, I just nearly snapped. HAHAHA! BUT I DIDN'T BECAUSE I was so ANGRY I just stormed out of the phone store instead! HEHAEH

The absolute CHERRY ON THE TOP Besides the fact I have the worst indigestion from whatever I ate at McDonald's, the internet was down for several hours! WOO HOO! AWESOME. I couldn't access ANYTHING because it kept asking me to use my phone to verify, and I sat there thinking, "WHAT PHONE? IT'S BUSTED, YOU PIECE OF *@&^!"

These are just MINOR INCONVENICENCES. First-world problems! Definitely not the worst thing that could happen, I assure you, but BOY DO THEY SUCK. My head is throbbing, I had to stop typing to nearly vomit, and YET HERE I AM.

HA HA HA HAHAEHAEAHAHAHAH

IT's oKAY I HAVE SO MANY groceries that ARE BAD NOW.

JUST PART AND PARCEL of living in the BIGGGGGGGGG CITTTYYY

LOVE IT. LOVE IT LOVE IT LOVE IT L͇ͫ͢Ọͦͮ͟Ṿ̿͠E̲͆ͯ͞ ̓ͫ҉͉Į̘̅͌T̮̍͞ L̨̡̠ͪ̕͞O̸̸ͥ͊͜͏͇V̴̧̫̔̎͆ͣ͜͞E̵̡̺͂̃ͫ́͡ ̴̧́̄́͏̖Iͮ̀͏̢̨̥̀T̸̢̢̻̑ͭ̈ͨ͠

because I ran out of my meds and I haven't taken it in over 24 hours and my hands keep shaking and I'm DEFINITELY OKAY THOUGH i am definitely ok

You know how I know I am definitely 100% ok? Because I was drawing despite shaking and I ¦¦¦▓▓▒▒▒░░

[[ĪF ᗰY S❤ƱĿ ѠᗩS ᗩ Ƈ❤Ŀ❤Ŕ ĪƬ Ѡ❤ƱĿD ßƐ ṖĪᑎҠ]]

I was tripping [[balls]] in my crib while in this same damn room. Those diamond patterns really @$%^ing pissed me off!

]]I may end up somewhere far away, and at first, I was happy, but now... I'm wondering if it's worth it. I hate the community here. The place I loved no longer exists. Everything changes too fast for me... I never got to appreciate the city to its full extent because I am not wealthy, but even then... Why would I stay living in a city? Why would I do this? Why am I second-guessing myself? I don't want to stay here for the reasons I should. I just want to bring the kitty from outside with me. Is that possible? Can I bring him with me? I love him so much, and the thought of someone hurting him when I'm no longer here makes me sick to my stomach. But he is a "feral" cat to anyone but me. Yet, I can't take him inside. What am I going to do? He is the one thing I don't want to leave behind...[[

[[Pink: The color of Compassion, Romance, and Nurture.]]