#malenadeestrella

☾1. Isolation𖤐

My mom used to always say everything happens for a reason and it always kept me up at night wondering "what reason do bad things need to happen? What reason is there for ruining someone's life or worse?" I think I was just overthinking it but I can't help that my mind always seems to wander and ponder, but she also has a high ego and a narcissistic heart so I don't really take her seriously sometimes.

Sometimes I wish that I don't have to know so many things that most kids don't know or choose to ignore, I wish my mind grew at the same rate as their's so once in my life I can feel like I finally belong.

After a long 10 minutes of staring at my celling and overthinking I get up, I get out of the warmth and into the cold. I change out of my matching black and white lace shorts and tank top I put on a polk a dot dress with black tights under and finishing my outfit with flats. Then I do what I need to do for the morning before heading out and walking to the bus stop, my wired headphones moving slightly against my skin while I walk.

When I reach the bus I sit beside my friend Faith, well I don't really know if were friends but we just talk on casual but I wouldn't say she's my best friend well you get the point right?

"Window seat?" She asks moving away from the window and letting me sit beside it, I promise I don't boss her around and tell her to do stuff. She just hates the window seat for some reason probably because she doesn't want to look at what's out there.

"Thanks."

"No problem, it's all yours." She says before looking back at her phone, the silence between us so obvious and awkward. I look back out the window, putting my earphones back in my ear. Blasting the song "Crack baby" in my earphones, while daydreaming of the small story with many parts inside my head.

The walk inside school was depressing, I've done this so many times before and it always feels the same. The same sad repeating feeling I can't seem to get away from, I can't wait for winter break next week.

Advisory goes the same as usual, so does 1st and 2nd period, it isn't till 3rd period that the day goes different from usual. Mrs.Ogle tries to lower down the class volume and I'm sure other teachers in other classes are doing the same but once you knock down a bee's hive you can't put it back up.

"Woah another one already that's like a record!"

"I can't believe it...she was in my 5th period."

"This is just too close to home man."

Students chatter and whisper while looking down at their phones, based of each of their words and baffled looks on their faces I try to figure out what's happening cause I don't want to take out my phone in class and get yelled at, actually maybe they can't yell at me if they can't see it hopefully.

I look at my phone under the desk, looking at the notification stating "Another girl has gone missing in Castramville" I then click the notification and see the news article.

Harlow Donahue, 16 year old student that attends Castram High School goes missing. She was last seen around Holly Beach at 8:46 at night. She was wearing blue jeans and a pink and white striped shirt. Around 5'6, birthmark on her wrist. IF YOU SEE SOMETHING, SAY SOMETHING!

Surprise and shock travels through my blood, I talked to her sometimes during Pe or Language arts I hope she's safe. She was so outgoing, smart, and nice she doesn't deserve what the universe gave to her. It hits me, something my mom said. Anything could happen within a second, you have to always be prepared for the worst. I guess she is kinda right on that one.

The day moves by slowly, normally the halls are so loud and annoying but today it's quiet and gloomy. I think everybody is just scared that their next, well the girls are and I have to admit I'm scared too. The disappearances have all been girls so far, young women to be exact. It's just picking us off one by one, or I don't really know all I do know is that I'm to be a girl in this day and age and I’m scared to 𝖽𝖾𝖺𝗍𝗁.

.

*RINGGG* The bell signaled a glum day at school was over, everybody could now go home and dream about leaving this creepy town or lay in bed and let the warmth of their blanket allow them to cower in laziness which I would do too. But unfortunately I have to stay one more hour after school, I head to the library and meet up with my older brother by one year Caesar.

"Did you hear about the missing girl? She went to our school!"

Ceaser stated, and we both walk towards the gym.

"Of course I did, the whole school did Ceaser." I reply.

"Oh well I don't want you to walk to home from the bus because of that so I'm going to get a ride from my friends to take us home."

"Which ones?" I ask curiously also a bit annoyed, a walk from the bus to home really isn't that big of a walk I don't know why he's getting so dramatic.

"You'll see." When we walk in the gym I notice his small group of friends, Ive seen them before but we don't talk. I sit down on one of the gym seats and take out my few assignments that I plan to get done by the time I leave here, Ceaser joins his friends that are not so far away from me. It isn't long before Ceaser brings them in my direction for a "proper greeting"

"Hi...." I greet the last one of them, he was wearing a black button up and some eyeliner on his eyelids which kinda made him stick out from the 4 other friends.

"Hey, Malena right?" He stuck out his hand to shake mine, I imminently toke note of the crescent moon on his wrist before returning my eyes back at his.

"Mhm." I respond a bit quiet but still hearable, I dislike greeting people with a passion it just feels too awkward for me. My hand goes on his before removing my hand shortly after from the handshake.

"My name's Nick" he says I return back to what I was doing a couple seconds later and all the boys attention get back to talking.

.

As the days past the town went less gloomy as some of us were holding on the hope that the missing girls will show up while others know the possibilities and choose to move on no matter how much the town grieves. I think I'm one of those people that hold onto the hope but also know the possibilities, I think for me having someone closer to me go missing really hit me knowing the reality of the situation because earlier than that I just hoped the missing girls were found alive and well.

"Malena...." I hear a faint whisper call out to me but there's none in my room, maybe I should just ignore it? I turn to the other side of my bed ignoring it, maybe it's part of my head.

"Malena!" I hear the voice again but this time louder and recognizable, and this time I sit up in my bed looking around my room and see Harlow standing in front of my bed. Wearing the same thing that she went missing in blue jeans, a pink and white striped shirt. Her hair was messy and leaves were in it, there seemed to be dirt on her skin and clothes and blood?

"Harlow?" I whisper getting up looking at her sympathetically, my mind ponders again and a repetition of questions follow each other in my mind. Harlow in response gestures me the shhh gesture before gesturing me to follow her, in which I do.

The cold breeze hits my skin and my white baby doll dress with its cute little black bow can not even give me warmth, Harlow doesn't speak the whole walk it isn't until we reach a high hill with my comfort tree on it that she speaks.

"I had to be quite....if we're silent it can't hear us." , "It can't get us here, the others led me to you-" She stops after hearing rustling in the bushes and a look of fear washes her face.

"We have to go nowww!" She grabs my wrists and is about to run and lead my down the hill until she freezes in her track, I turn to look at her but she is dragged away from my grip pushing me to the ground. I look up and see....see it? Its yellow eyes glowed so bright in the darkness that I saw nothing but it's eyes. The ground opened where Harlow stood dragging her...dragging her inside it, yet she still held on and I tried to grab her back but a force pushed me back.

"ITS ALL A PATTERN, WE ARE ALL A PATTE-" I could tell she wanted to say more but the ground swallowed her up before she could even speak more, I looked up at it and it was gone before my eyes could even lay on it. I ran to tree my comfort space, sitting down and buying my face in my knees.

"WAKE UP!!!" I gasp at the sudden sound and rub my eyes open, my eyes looking at my popcorn celling and looking at my brother Ceaser standing beside my bed. I sit up and look at my phone to check the time but Ceaser answers it for me.

"It's 10:34 but you were supposed to wake up at 9:15 because we NEED to be out the door by 11 BECAUSE I have work and you have to do whatever you said you needed to do yesterday." Ceaser puts his hand in his pockets and I process that it was a dream and I need to do stuff today in the view seconds I look at the wall behind.

"Oh...oh" I realize and Ceaser just sighs before walking out, I quickly put on a short white dress with matching color lace on the top and bottom of the dress. Before putting on my usual flats and fixing my hair. It felt too real to be a dream...she was so real, and what pattern was she talking about?

A set of realization washes over me as I connect the few dots I got, she's missing and the last word she said is that "We are all a pattern" well she was going to say pattern before she got dragged inside the hole in the ground. There's been other missing people, specially young women that's a pattern but that's too obvious, there's another pattern in the works.

"HURRY UP OR I'M GOING TO LEAVE YOU HERE!" Caesar yells from downstairs and I run downstairs, grabbing my bag from the hat holder and meeting him outside.

The afternoon passes by the same as it would always go, Caesar's away at working as a waiter, I cash out my check from my job and pay the water and phone bills leaving my mom to do the rest.

"Have you heard about that girl being found?"

"No I don't recall, what happened? Was it one of the missing girls?"

"Indeed it was, poor girl she had a whole life ahead of her she was only 19. She was found in the eerie part of the hiking trail, she went missing 1 month ago I'm surprised they found her now." 2 middle aged women talk to each other, sipping their margaritas as if it was just front yard talk.

"Hello I can't help but overhear, what was the name of the missing girl that was found dead?" I walk over to the women, hoping for an answer.

"Lauren Delilah. Dear you look around the missing girls age be careful around night, especially with that maniac strolling the night." I had gotten my answer but I was more aware of the danger I was in, there's only so many girls my age in this town.

I met with Caesar once again after his shift but instead of going home he wanted to go to a party, I know a party in all this chaos that the town is facing. What happened to being safe? Staying inside our home, and praying to god that whatever is taking the missing girls doesn't take us too. But no, I guess we are not playing it safe, we might as well be running to death's doorstep.

"Rad dress." My thoughts are interrupted by a boy who I formerly know but don't really talk to that much.

"Thanks Brad?" I look down at my dress once again, it's a white plain fucking dress what's rad about that? But it's what he thinks not me, I assume he's trying to make conversation but small talk isn't really my thing so I walk outside once again.

I sit on a chair and take appreciation of the silence unlike the loud party that's happening inside. The wind makes the silence more interesting, and the things around me make me feel less bored as I observe the details of them.

"Hey." I look up to see one of my brother's friends that I was introduced to a couple days ago, Mike. The dirty blonde, tall, sweet white guy of the group.

"Hey."

“What are you doing here?” Mike questions, almost as if he’s concerned but also just a genuine question. Wait never mind I’m going off track again, overthinking sucks.

“Could say the same for you.” Mike responds with a chuckle and sits beside me, drinking a cup of hot chocolate which is weird because people usually drink beer but whatever gets him going.

“Don’t wanna deal with the people I guess…don’t really feel in the party mood.” He slumps but still makes me jealous with that cup of hot chocolate in his hand.

“Yea me too, I’m overstimulated right now and the music sucks, I wanna go home, I wanna sleep and I’m also a little jealous of you with that hot chocolate.” We both share a laugh and time passes and we get caught in the moment, no not whatever you’re thinking but talking. A deep talk, like about climate change, things that are overrated, and who we wanted to be in life.

It isn’t till a scream catches our attention that we stop talking, we both run to the source of the scream. Everybody was crowded together, mixed emotions came off the crowd. My eyes catch a familiar face not in the crowd but on the river shore.

Harlow Donahue looking exactly the same as I saw her in the dream but dead, her body lifeless and empty. She has leaves in her hair, blood on her clothes and skin, but she she was paler.

“CALL THE POLICE!!!! CALL THE POLICE!” The only words that break the silence in the crowd, I guess we were all stuck in movement, shocked it was the first dead body we all saw. What a story that will make on the high school reunion, but I doubt we’ll all make it there.

•

It had been a few days since the body of Harlow Donahue had been found, the police had now decided that we didn’t have a kidnapper but a serial killer in our town now and it highly unlikely the missing girls would show up alive.

School had gotten much more weary now, after what most people saw they had become more aware and anxious of the situation. We all knew the danger we were and we knew that soon enough it would be one of us.

I wasn’t a believer but still I rode my bike to the church after school, it was old but I needed an answer from the beyond. I held onto the necklace my father gave me in my hands, looking up at the statue of god before me.

“I know sometimes I doubt that you exist but I ask you please…please give me an answer to what’s happening, why was she in my dream? Who hurt those poor girls?” It feels as if Im taking to a brick wall, I’m the only one talking and I never get an answer but I’ll push my hope I guess.

When leaving the church I bump into a face from, Im sure she’s surprised I’m here but during this time of crisis we all need faith Id hope she assume.

“Was it worth it?” She says while my back is turned, as Im about to get on my bike.

“What?”

“Did you feel his presence? Did he give you hope or were you just met with awkward silence?” Fiona asks from the heart, she’d ask a question we’d all wanted to ask but never had the courage to ask ourselves.

“Time will tell.” I then leave her hanging, not to be mean but I don’t how to answer that question but an ‘I don’t know’.

Soon I was at my brother Caesar’s workplace, skimming through the local newspaper looking to find something useful but no use. I kept an ear out for the 2 rich women that always sip their margaritas and gossip no use, the chatty police officer no use, none had answer everyone always had a question.

All but one thing of course, not a person but a tree, the old hallow tree.

“Gonna go tell my brother I’m leaving.” I tell the girl that always sits inside the pizza place, Anna. We’re pretty chill with each since the 5th grade when we bonded over discussion how school should start at 9:50.

“Where to?”

“The old hallow tree.”

“Woah creepy but I love it, wait stay safe my long time friend.”

“Of course.”

Soon I reached the destination of my favorite tree, she’d watch so many things in her lifetime even in the beyond. She’d resisted so many things and now she’s here, alive and well.

I sat down in front of it, it’s calling me here I know it is. Harlow chose this place for a reason and I’m not going to let her effort go to waste. But I don’t what to do, I don’t if I should sleep or what?

Soon enough I heard the rustling in the bushes, and my heart began to race quicker than ever before I stood up looking around and my eyes landed on another’s. It glowed like in the dream and soon more of the eyes came out, I ran but was pushed by something. It dragged me by my legs, I don’t know where but I also hated the feeling of the leaves and small sticks rubbing against my skin while I was getting dragged.

My eyes were covered for a second and I was thrown into a hard wooden place, my screams echoed in the forest but none but them could hear it. The one in the middle struck out, instead of like the others, instead of bright white eyes like the others, it had bright yellow eyes. As much I was confused I was also scared for my life, I was in a coffin.

A closed coffin now. It was pitch dark and the only thing I could hear was footsteps on the dirt ground and the echo of my own scream, I was all alone. All alone in a small, narrow, dark coffin. None answered my screams of help, my screams that now had turn into sobs. I am going to be the next one, the next girl to go missing and turn up dead and be the next of the rich ladies top of the morning breakfast gossip. A shame I thought I was going to make it out of this shitty town, but man was that a dream.

Time passed, I don’t know how much time but most likely a couple hours that I had been stuck in the coffin. None but myself to keep company, my mind was the loudest thing I could hear. I held my necklace so tight in my hands, the gold moon pendant in my hands felt so comfortable in this small space. I pictured my brothers face when he found out I too had become one of the missing girls, my father’s shame of not being a protecter, my mothers stupid tears on her face, and my cousin Louie becoming more of a believer.

The coffin door creaked open to my surprise, and I was met with the sunlight peaking in the pitch dark space. Are my eyes pulling a prank on me? Am I just lucky? Was this even real to begin with?

Furthermore I push it completely open and sit up, taking a look of my surroundings. The sky is a pinkish color making the sun look more orange than yellow, the birds tweet in the distance, the forest appearing so heavenly in this moment despite being hell hours ago. I waste no time getting up and running home, at first I was confused on where I was but when I reached the old hallow tree I knew I was going in the right direction.

My heart pounds quicker and quicker yet my adrenaline keeps me running, if it weren’t for that I would be slowing down by now. I feel a bit safer when I pass by the pizza place signifying I was much closer to home now. It’s strange really I don’t know if I’m more scared that they’re coming back to get me or that I’m losing my connection to the wall keeping my reality and hallucinations separate.

I stand in front of the blue small house with outgrown grass bushes and grass in front of it, my eyes stuck on the red door as if waiting for someone to come out. As if I wanted someone to run out and gesture me to come inside, care for me, question where I’ve been. But none did.

I walked inside the chilly house, sighing a breath of relief. Everything just happened so fast, I can’t keep track with it all.

“Where the hell were you?” The silence was broken in the midst of a loud and blithe voice.

“I was kidnapped..I was locked in a coffin.”

“I didn’t ask for lies Malena, I asked for the truth.” My mom chuckles to herself recklessly, completely ignorant in the moment.

“That was my truth.”

“There are girls being kidnapped and killed right now, the least you could fucking do is be a little more human bout it.” There’s no use in arguing with her, she can’t hear more than she can think.

The walk upstairs was humiliating, I had once become a liar in my mom’s eyes. The mirror reflection of what happened to me this night, hair ruffled, dirt stains on my plain white dress, and tear stains from pleading to be let out. I was nothing but a mess and a girl that is losing her way.

•

Days passed, the emptiness grew even more and so did the fear. For now there hadn’t been any girls going missing or found dead but that’s maybe because I might be next.

“Malena?” A familiar voice calls out to me.

“Yea.”

“What are you doing out here? It’s 4 in the morning.” Now I see his face clearly since he sat beside me, it was one of my brother’s friends Nick

“Ohh…I didn’t realize, I think I confused the time.” I didn’t actually realize how zoned out I have been lately, from burning bread in the toaster, walking to the wrong class, and now going to school at the wrong time and the crazy thing was that my mind was just silent the whole time.

“Going through somethin Malena? Your mental health okay?”

“Yea just really tired.”

“It’s a Saturday and you walked to school at 4 am in the morning, forgive me but i don’t think your mind is in the right place.”

“Maybe not right now, but most of the time I am.”

“Mhm yea, come on let’s get you home. I’m sure your brother Ceaser is worried sick about you.” He’s probably sleeping safe and sound.

His voice was monotonous, not once getting higher or lower as if he had no particular tone at all.

Mike, whom I assume is his closest friend stood infront of his car. A cigarette in between his thin lips and his fingers. I hadn’t noticed how him and Nick always seemed to be wearing opposite color’s despite having the same taste in everything. Whilst Nick wore black button ups and jeans and sorta had an edgy style, Mike had on darkish blue jeans and a various of autumn color shirts making him seem a little hippy.

Once inside the car I sat beside Waren, another one of Ceaser’s friends and Nick’s band mates. He seemed to be a big fan of both weed and cocaine hence because he was always doing it and why the car constantly smelt of weed.

“How do you manage to accidentally walk to school way before it opens and on a day your not supposed to go?” He questioned not once making eye contact just smoking his weed and taking big sips of his beer can.

“I uhh-“

“Waren don’t be a dick man.” Mike hissed from the front seat and made eye contact with me in the rear view mirror. He was different from the others in his own way, his own way that I appreciate very much.

Their two other bandmates Ronald and Levi weren’t in the van hence the why it feels so quiet in here and a little empty. I guess I’m used to hanging around the whole bandmates, nevertheless I didn’t really know them.

Ceaser said they recently moved here a couple months ago, Castramville of all places can you believe it? I’m guessing they grouped up and were teen runaways based on the lack of parent figures I mean they don’t seem like they’re students at the school. In fact they seem like are just here to lay low and figure things out.

“Well we’re here Malena.” Nick announced and got out the car to open the van door for me, I’m pretty sure Waren took a breath of relief since he now has the whole entire backseat to himself. Nick walked beside me to my front door, I heard Mike in the distance.

“Goodbye Malena, catch up on some sleep.” I only gave him a nod and a small smile of complying, I stood at my door unlocking it while Nick looked down at me. Staring me down as if waiting to push me in the house, his eyes fooling me for pure innocence.

When I finally went inside and close the door behind me he finally spoke, like a bear finally coming out of his hibernation.

“Hey be careful out there okay? It’s a scary town, don’t get lost.” His words were promising but genuine, and I couldn't help but blush a little at his words.