sheâs all i wanna be
Summary: you are insecure in your relationship with Eddie
Warnings: reader has a negative body image, mean girl behavior, bullying
I have no idea why the formatting is so weird lol
Your relationship with Eddie was new. It was fun and exciting but also scary. You had never had feelings like this for anyone before. He always made time for you, recently skipping D&D or cutting band practice short so he could squeeze in more time to spend with you. Because Eddieâs world was newly revolving around your every move, his friends were getting annoyed with you and your constant presence.
You walk into the cafeteria and sit at your usual spot at the Hellfire table. You didnât know if you should without Eddie, but he had to meet with Miss Click about his last test grade. He assured you that the boys would love to have you sit with them.
You quietly sit and greet them with a weak smile and wave.
âOh hey y/n, where is Eddie? Gareth questioned.
âHe had to meet with Miss Click to go over his last exam, hope you donât mind me sitting hereâ you said as you unpacked the contents of your lunchbox.
âAnd you arenât waiting outside the classroom for him to be doneâ Jeff let out with a weak laugh.
Your face flushed because you had actually thought of doing that.
âI donât get how he isnât completely tired of you always hanging around him and pulling him away from what he loves. Itâs so confusing since just a few months ago he couldnât shut up about his crush on Chrissy, and now heâs with you insteadâ Mike said cruelly.
Your face was still red hot and you were fighting back the tears in your eyes.
âI guess he just settled for the off brand Chrissyâ Jeff said with a laugh, as the rest of the boys chucked with him.
You quickly stood up and grabbed your belongings not able to listen anymore.
âHey, we were just joking with you!â Mike called out and you ran out.
You left the school down an old trail you and Eddie frequently took when you just needed to get away. You headed to the rusted bench to take a minute to yourself when you heard Eddieâs laugh. You peer through the bushes only to see Eddie dramatically falling onto the ground in front of the one and only Chrissy Cunningham.
She was definitely flirting with him, twisting her perfect blonde hair as she asked him about Corroded Coffin. You saw enough, taking off to head in the direction of your house.
On your way home you couldnât help but think negatively of yourself. She was definitely prettier than you. She had a smaller waist, long blonde hair and came from money. You didnât have anything like that to offer, youâd probably choose her too.
As you walked past the drug store, you had a moment of thinking âmaybe I can look like herâ as you wondered in looking for some hair dye. You decided on a box of bleach, thinking that adding some highlights could maybe help your look.
As soon as you got home you rushed to the bathroom and locked the door behind you. You pull out the instructions and read them over 3 times to ensure you know what you are doing. You decided you were ready, you started to mix the chemicals that smelt so strong you were sure youâd get high from the fumes. As neatly as you could you applied the paste to your hair and let it be for 45 minutes. You rinse the chemical off, throwing your hair up in a towel on your head as you wipe the fog off the mirror.
Then you were horrified. Once you pulled the towel off all you could feel was instant regret. Your roots were white blonde while other pieces were bright orange and another section still your original color. You were panicking trying to figure out your next move when there was a knock on the bathroom door.
âHey y/n dad said dinner is readyâ your little sister, El informed you.
You muttered some profanities before saying, âtell him Iâm not hungry!â
You suddenly hear heavy footsteps approaching the bathroom door.
âNone of that y/n, come on we are eating dinnerâ Hopper insisted.
âSorry I canâtâ you blurt out.
âExcuse me? You canât? Open this door right now y/nâ
You knew you couldnât win. You slowly opened the door to reveal the mess you were currently dealing with.
âWhat the hell y/nâ Hopper said as he pinched the bridge of his nose.
âI know it looks really bad -â you start
âReally bad is an understatementâ El cuts you off with a giggle. You give her a death stare and she runs down the hallway.
âI can call Joyce tomorrow to see if she can come help you fix it after school,â Hopper said, rubbing his face with his hand.
âAfter school?! Dad no way thatâs too longâ
âSheâs at work y/n, youâll just have to wear a hat or somethingâ he says as he lets out a laugh.
You continue just to give him an annoyed glare.
The next morning you tuck all of your hair into a beanie, then place the hood of your sweatshirt over top to further disguise yourself.
As you make your way downstairs for school, your father sees you and chuckles.
âI donât know why you think this is funnyâ you say as you pour your bowl of cereal.
âThis is one of those moments I will never let you forget,â he replies.
You just have to get through today, stay low and avoid Eddie that all you have to do. Standing at your locker you grab the books you need as you notice Eddie approaching you with a smile and wave. You took off to your class taking your seat and opening your book up as quickly as possible to bury your head in.
âHey y/n I tried to call you last night but you didnât answerâ Eddie said as he took his seat behind you, chains hitting onto the desk.
âI was busyâ you reply coldly.
âAre you mad at me? Did I do something wrong?â He said leaning forward.
Thankfully the bell rang and Miss Click walked in already telling everyone to quiet down.
âOk class today I want you to turn to page 110- yes Miss Cunningham?â Miss Click said as Chrissy raised her hand.
âI just was thinking Iâm pretty sure itâs against the dress code to wear hats inside and I just donât think it would be fair if certain people were an exception to the rulesâ
âWhy yes that is a rule, Miss Hopper you need to remove your hoodâ
Your heart sunk and your face instantly got red. You sat there like a statue for a minute trying to decide what to do.
âMiss Hopper if you donât remove the hood this instant I will have to send you to the principal's office to call you father.â
You slowly pull the hood back and stare at Miss Click.
âThe beanie too dearâ Miss Click said.
As you pull it off your head you can hear the whole room gasp followed by laughter.
âOh myâ is all Miss Click could get out before you grabbed your books and bolted out of the room. You faintly heard Eddie calling your name but you didnât turn back, you headed straight home with tears running down your face.












