#madlion.

But she always comes back, right? 

Not this time, because when you wake up in your bed, you're cold. 

"Darcy?" you ask. The room is so empty her names doesn't hang, it doesn't echo, is just falls to the ground in the thin air, and it's gone.

You don't pay attention, and you finally get your third character on Borderlands 2 up to the level cap. Then you ask again,

Darcy?

No answer, and you feel your heart start to shatter, a new sensation, and your eyes water because oh god it hurts.

You decide to check -- why did it take you this long to check? -- and you find her clothes are gone.

Her lipstick, her high heels, her tape. Gone. Just the way her name disappears once it slips off of your tongue, off your lips.

Darcy? Your voice cracks, and that's when you realize that she doesn't always have to come back. 

And why should she? 

Who cooks: darcy omg i'm so sorry but you do NOT want maddox cooking for you. kj;ldfg bUT HE PROBABLY TRIES TO COOK FOR HER ALL THE TIME I'M CRYING "darcy look! i made salmon! we actually might die! let's eat!!!!!!!!" 

Who does the laundry and other chores: again darcy is gonna have to clean up after maddox's stUPID ass. he is so anti cleaning that it's disgusting. she can smack him and tell him to clean when she's tired. i feel liek he's more scared of her wrath than he is of cleaning up dirty clothes. 

How many children do they have: may..... be two? CARSYN WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT THIS MORE OKAY

Who’s more dominate: darcy omg. like tbh she's the one that makes all the moves. SHE KISSES HIM TO GET HIS ATTENTION and pushes him around and he'll sit there and take i'm laughing i'm so sorry maddox is the shittiest

Favorite nonsexual activity: not gonna lie he LOVES watching her dance. and it's not just because of legs he just.... really likes ballet and ugh stars in his eyes while she's dancing okay

Their favorite place to be together: on the couch cuddling :') or backstage after she's just got done performing????

Any traditions: lmao what are traditions. i'm p sure the only thing that they do that could be considered a tradition is making out while he plays video games omf

Their “song”:  LOL "SUCK MY KISS" BYT HE RED HOT CHILI PEPPERS (not really but omfg idk as;ldkfjasdf CARSYN HELP ME)

What they do for each other on holidays: i feel like maddox tries to go all out and showers her with presents and love and gross romantic things to make up for be a shit head but then fucks everything up somehow because he is TERRIBLE at planning. i'm not sure what darcy would do tho (he just wants kisses okay!!!!!)

Where did they go for their honeymoon: ..... vegas

Where did they first meet: SCHOOl. in class together. he probably made fun of her and then apologized because he was afraid of...... som.....ething

Any pets: pls isn't maddox enough (they probably have a big dog and maddox loves it and its exactly like maddox good luck darcy)

What do they fight over: "maddox wtf stop playing video games you need to go grocery shopping" "maddox PUT THE REMOTE DOWN" "darcy i'm sorry but you can't take ur shoes off in here" "DID YOU SERIOUSLY JUST KNIFE ME I WAS SHOOTING YOU I DON'T HOW TO PLAY THIS GAME" constantly shouting at each other but also givin' each other kisses!!!!

maddox probably talks about Being with darcy all the time but says it like he's joking so no one catches on that he really likes her (except for albus because maddox has probably told albus)

and lol imagine maddox just staring at her legs all the time because a) ballerina legs are ugh perfect and b) H E E L S

like shit boy stop drooling ur embarrassing

i bet the rest of the crew is like

(he's also probably got a very gr8 love affair w/ the white persons drugs of choice, heroin)

(cause lol he's doing nothing with his life)

"hey scorpius what does albus taste like"

"hugo shut up you hang out with girls"

"albus why didn't you tell me you were gay when we first met i feel like there are so many opportunities we missed to make out"

"hugo let's make out"

"darcy your feet are cancer please cover them up always forever"

"scorpius why are you so blonde"

"albus let's make out"

"darcy let's make out"

"someone make out with me"

and what's annoying is that he really isn't all the annoying he's just always being a halfassed bitch ja feel