#maddywritesabunch

Do you know how many times I say that to myself on a daily basis? A lot. I only work 2 days a week, not even 20 hours and I dread going to work. It makes me anxious about getting enough sleep and being able to wake up for class the next morning because I work until 1:30am.

I never realize how lucky I am for the job that I have and for what it has done for me. I also never realize that the main reason I have a job isn't to provide for myself and sustain my life, it is so I can have fun, eat out with my friends, go shopping and indulge myself with the "finer" things in life.

That isn't a bad thing. I work for what I want. My parents are teaching me a lesson that I am already starting to be grateful for: save money. I'm not used to this simple concept. I range from <$300 to $6 in my bank account. I never have anymore than that because I'm a sophomore in college that can't save money to help save myself from a world of hurt when I'm older. It's gross how much I spend.

So yeah, I really don't want to go to work but once I'm there I'm great. I'm a cashier at a convenience store on my campus and I love it. I meet so many people and I enjoy what I do for the most part. But since it's so late at night (I work 9p-1:30a) of course I get delusional from lack of sleep (it doesn't help that I have an 8:30a lab that morning as well). Things become funny and things that suck suck more. Like if a customer has a bad attitude it affects me and I don't like it because my job is to be happy and to be positive for the customers. It just sucks. That and the fact that my feet hurt a lot from just standing behind a counter for 4 hours is the only reason I don't actually like my job.

I could probably quit and be happy, I wouldn't have as much structure in my schedule because I'd have more free time that I would spend on Netflix and sleeping but then I also wouldn't have any income and I wouldn't be able to pay for gas to go on midnight drives or even make it home for the weekend.

As much as I hate the thought of a job I need one. It helps keep my schedule intact and it gives me an income that I worked for and can spend on anything. It helps me feel independent and that I can actually live on my own.

You may say to yourself how much you hate your job and that you "don't want to go to work" but trust me you wouldn't be working if you didn't have something you were working for.

Always look for the brighter side of things. Start saving half of your paycheck now and maybe you can quit and live comfortably for the rest of your life in 30 years. I dunno. But you have goals and things you want and people you need to take care of (i.e. yourself). Your job, no matter how terrible, is there to help you attain those goals and help you live a life worth living. You just have to be thankful for whatever income you have.