#m0naghan

the decision itself wasn't a difficult one to make, they'd witnessed enough to know that the beach did its job on higgs ( a little too well, really ). it had taken some coaxing & then the threat of picking him up & carrying him inside before higgs got with the program & realized that he was genuinely being lifted off the beach. that had been over a month ago & progress was slow going ( sam wouldn't expect otherwise ) but sam & fragile have managed to get higgs to open up, even if only briefly for him to be an asshole before he shuts down again. 

sighing, sam rubs a hand down his face in frustration, digesting fragile's words as he does so. ❝ he's refusing food again ? ❞ sam thought they got over that hurdle with him. the first two weeks were a pain in the ass ensuring that higgs didn't starve himself. seems that he's going through an episode again, or being a picky bastard. ❝ what's his excuse this time ? ❞ words spoken as he reaches for the tray in fragile's hands, determined on getting higgs to eat, one way or another.

He was used to getting his hands dirty, so accustomed to doing everything on his own, it was second nature to take initiative. The one thing he never envisioned however, was wrangling wildlife to stow as cargo. Wrestling kangaroos seemingly became second nature- but not without its cuts and bruises. Surely it was a sight, restraining the small beast, a few scrapes to the arms and face just proof of his hard work as he’d rise up victorious. He'd adjust the straps on his bag, preparing to make space on his back for the animal as he spoke.

starter for @m0naghan / death stranding au.

           THE  CHOICE  TO  WATCH  over  Higgs  was  not  her  own.  She  was  a  porter  after  all,  a  career  path  she  had  chosen  because  of  the  anxiety  that  people  brought  out  within  her.  It  was  a  path  where  she  got  to  help  people  but  remain  at  a  distance,  not  having  to  make  eye  contact,  nor  having  to  embarrass  herself  with  the  way  she  stuttered.

However,  as  a  fellow  DOOMS  sufferer,  and  someone  that  was  basically  invisible  to  BTs,  it  seemed  she  was  the  best  choice  they  had  at  the  moment  -  despite  all  the  precautions  that  were  already  in  place,  people  seemed  to  be  extra  paranoid  when  it  came  to  this  particular  prisoner.  With  good  reason,  of  course.  Grace  had  heard  of  the  things  he  had  done.  Had  looked  into  his  files,  always  enjoying  research  and  a  project.  But  she  did  think  this  was  rather  over  kill  -  perhaps  they  just  used  everything  else  as  an  excuse.  Perhaps  really  it  was  her  timid  nature  that  made  them  think  she  wouldn't  connect  with  the  prisoner  and  simply  do  her  job.

Unfortunately,  there  was  only  so  much  silence  a  person  could  take  between  two  people.  Especially  when  it  was  someone  she  was  seeing  several  times  a  day,  every  day  to  deliver  food  and  necessities.  It  had  been  a  few  weeks  of  absolute, deafening  silence,  but  Grace  figured  at  this  point  a  few  words  here  and  there  surely  couldn't  hurt  -  and  he  had  no  choice  but  to  sit  there  and  listen  to  her  prattling  after  all.  It  would  be  good  practice  on  her  end  to  keeping  her  voice  steady.  She  had  been  saying  ' hi ' and  ' h-here  you  go '  of  course.  She  didn't  want  to  be  rude,  but  she  wanted  to  aim  higher.

So  when  it  came  time  to  deliver  the  next  meal  to  Higgs  -  Grace  steeled  herself,  plan  in  mind  and  put  the  food  down  next  to  him,  taking  a  deep  breath  before  speaking.

He can sense the shift in the air, even out here. The hunt too find that familiar face was short, some part of him always knowing where to look. A faint smile curls at the corner of his lips and his chest tightens with a rush of guilt. How long it been? How long was he searched for? The space between them is closed as the porter reached instinctively out to cradle @m0naghan's face. Glove clad thumbs brushing over the hallow of cheeks. Lost on how very different he looked being to caught up in that moment of relief.

THIS WAS A MISTAKE. So often does his curiosity get the better of him. Curious to see if cardiac arrest would take him to the beach. Curious to see if he'd still come back from it. Curious to see where the tracks led to. Curious to see if he could find Higgs' beach. Curious, curious, curious. It's only ever done him favors half the time.

It's not like he's never been here before. Heartman is a common, uninvited visitor. But never once has he been here while it's occupied. He should swim away, return back to the land of the living. And yet, he finds himself frozen. Be it out of scientific or merely personal curiosity, he stays, and hopes he's caught. One should admonish him for such lack of professionalism, but everybody knows that Heartman's yearning for more knowledge only grows with time.

And he's sure he's been spotted by now, squatted by a rock like a child playing hide-and-seek, unaware that he's too big to be playing this game anymore. He shuts his eyes, holds his breath, like he'd disappear if Higgs didn't see him. "Sorry--" he blurts. "I'll leave. I'll leave, just--"

@m0naghan SENT : do you hate me?

the audacity to ask when she can barely look at him in the eye - he should be the one ashamed, yet all fragile can think about is higgs' backstabbing coming out of nowhere when he had promised to her they would always be on the same side. "spare me," full of venom in her tone, that thirst for revenge never really leaving even as fragile tried and tried so hard to not let the past corrupt what's left of the future.

"if you're looking for forgiveness, you won't find it from me peter," long gone are the days where she could have been able to sit down and try to understand - there's been way too much water under their bridge to consider that an option now. "i don't care if you live or die," it's final in ways that should feel like closing a door that stayed open for longer than intended, yet fragile feels no satisfying closure.

smoke  dripped  from  lips  that  had  began  to  chap  under  the  sun  ,  sun  burns  on  his  neck  ,  unprotected  by  the  brim  of  his  hat  .     this  was  the  last  cigarette  in  the  pack  ,  &&  much  like  dwindling  resources  of  nicotine  ,  his  patience  wore  thin  .     leant  against  the  frame  of  his  tri-bike  ,  jezebel"s  engine  still  hot  to  touch  .     iron  strapped  to  her  sides  ;  a  mix  between  but  not  a  single  lethal  bullet  in  his  pockets  .   

                                        𝒕𝒆𝒏𝒔𝒊𝒐𝒏  𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒆𝒓  𝒑𝒓𝒐𝒎𝒑𝒕𝒔                   @m0naghan  :  "I dare you to try."

"     sure  you  wanna  anger  me  ,  boy  ?     there's  a  bounty  on  you  .     "    the  cigarette  getting  shorter  .    "     just  senseless  threats  from  a  fool  i  ain"t  got  no  beef  with  .    you  do  you  .     but  get  outta  my  face  with  that  shit  .     "

the  butt  of  the  cigarette  stomped  by  the  butt  of  his  boot  ;     "     play  nice  &&  i  dont  tell  the  d.c  i  saw  your  face  .     "