#luxe;

5pm.

the first thing she notices is just how beautiful each of them look. personally, she’s a big fan of their outfits, reveling in just how pretty she feels. she spends time appreciating each member’s appearance, though her gaze lingers on eunae in particular. she isn’t used to seeing her dressed this way; maybe that’s why she finds herself fixated on her, finding it almost impossible to look away for even a moment — she just isn’t used to it, she supposes.

she manages to make it through the press conference without saying anything particularly damning — meaning she’s off to a good start (thanks, refresher courses). if it’s any indication of how the rest of her day is going to play out, dawon knows that everything is going to work out perfectly. now isn’t the time for mistakes; it’s time to show all of korea just how powerful of a group luxe has grown to be, that they’re a force to be reckoned with.

6pm-7pm.

she absentmindedly allows her eyes to flicker shut as the stylist works on her hair, something that’s become a habit of hers in recent months. it helps her thoughts to slow down, allowing dawon to feel something that resembles peace before their big moment. she tries not to worry about what lays ahead, instead focusing on just how much they’ve practiced, attempting to reassure herself that everything’s going to be perfect.

once again, she’s impressed with what has to be one of her favorite hairstyles. “aah, you’re so good at this...” she compliments the stylist as she admires herself in the mirror, unable to resist the excited smile that takes over her lips. her outfit is just as beautiful, and she’s overjoyed by the way it compliments her — it feels like the perfect debut look, and it’s impossible not to feel beautiful as she gazes at herself in the mirror. sona’s much prettier than dawon ever was, she thinks to herself, a subtle chuckle escaping her.

she grows increasingly anxious as each second passes by, heart racing each time she dwells on the fact that their debut is less than an hour away. for as long as she can remember, it’s been something to look forward to — something distant that never felt all too real. but this is as real as it gets, and she’s going to have to face it head on — she still hasn’t wrapped her mind around it yet, but, with enough time, she thinks it’s something she can adjust to.

only a few minutes now.

8pm.

the vcr comes to a close, and, after a brief introduction, it’s finally time to perform.

i was born for this, she thinks, praying that she’ll be able to hold onto her confidence.

after xayah finishes her first rap in dangerous, it’s finally dawon’s turn to sing. it’s her first chance since royal survival to show her voice to the world, a feeling that she’ll never get tired of.

너는 늘 이렇게 떠날 듯 말듯해 날 한걸음 또 한걸음 밀어내 이렇게 점점 날 더 어지럽게 해 이 미로 미로 미로 미로 속에 갇힌 난

it’s easily her favorite song on the album — not only does she enjoy just how much she gets to sing, but she also appreciates how well the song suits her. it’s a song that she fell in love with from the moment she heard it, instantly making its way into her heart. she only hopes that the public will love it just as much.

너는 아니라고 하지만 내게 보이는 너의 모습들이 너는 나를 쉽게 흔들리게 해 가까워진듯 더 멀어지게 해 또 난 아슬아슬하게

the bridge she shares with jihyun is unquestionably the most powerful part of the song — deep down, she knows it’ll be enough to leave a considerable impression on anyone listening. there’s no denying that the two main vocalists sound great together.

너는 늘 이렇게 떠날 듯 말듯해 날 한걸음 또 한걸음 밀어내 이렇게 점점 날 더 어지럽게 해 이 미로 미로 미로 미로 속에 갇힌 난

as the last chorus brings the song to a close, sona tries her best to savor the moment. it’s hard to believe that she’s actually standing here performing in front of three-thousand people. even now, it feels like more of a dream than anything else. she scans the crowd, trying to spot whatever family and friends have shown up to support her, but it’s almost impossible to see anyone due to the lighting. at least i’ll seem them after the showcase.

luv me soon begins to play, and, while it isn’t dawon’s favorite song on the album, she still feels nothing but love towards it.

Oh do you love me love me love me boy Do you love me love me love me boy 나 얼마나 사랑해 어서 빨리 말해 머리 굴리지 말고

for dawon, the song passes by rather quickly, perhaps due to just how much she enjoyed performing it. this already feels like the best night of her life, and it’s not even close to being over yet.

over these last few weeks, she’s given a lot of thought towards how she wants to be seen by the public — sona wants her title to be something that represents her, a word that's synonymous with her identity. she wants to choose something that means something to her, something that’s always meant something to her. and, after thinking for what felt like a lifetime, she had finally settled on just what she was looking for. to them, she isn’t just dawon anymore. no, she’s finally grown into something more. “i’m sona, goddess of song!” she greets the crowd, a radiant smile still glued to her features.

“i love each of the songs on the album, but if i had to pick a favorite..." she pauses, acting as if she’s thinking for a moment so that the decision doesn’t seem too easy. “i think it’d have to be dangerous! it’s a song that i really love to listen to, and i think it suits us as a group well. it just has such a pretty sound to it, you know? i just love it.”

as the first mc portion comes to an end, they prepare to perform once more. this time they’re showcasing still falls the rain, another of sona’s favorite tracks from the album. it’s a song that suits her voice well, she thinks, and she’s grateful that they’re able to show many different sides of luxe as a whole throughout the album.

비가 내린 후엔 슬퍼지는 밤엔 널 부르다 혼자 아프죠

as they prepare to perform without u, sona begins to notice a pattern: she considers every song on the album to be one of her favorite songs from the album — it’s a far cry groups that actually go so far as to dislike their debut albums and songs. for that, sona’s grateful, having never been a fan of performing songs that she isn’t passionate about.

I’m OK baby I’m freakin’ good good without you I’m gonna good good good without you boy Without you boy without you oh~ oh~

[insert emo paragraph of the second mc portion ft. any story involving eunae here bc i don’t have time to finish writing it before midnight in like ten minutes]

she watches in awe as the music video plays, the final product revealing itself to be more than she could have dreamed of. everything about it just seems so perfect, though maybe she is a little biased. once again, time seems to fly by, and the music video soon draws to a close. now it’s time for them to gear up for the most important performance of the night.

her heart feels as though it might beat out of her chest at any given moment. this is it, she thinks to herself. the moment i’ve dreamt of for years. it still feels all too surreal, the idea that she’s standing on stage about to actually debut still feeling like a far away dream. only this is her reality, something that she’s worked so hard to achieve — it’s everything that she’s wanted for so long. she draws in a deep breath, unable to resist as her lips form a radiant smile, knowing that her dreams are about to come true. this is it.

I’m feelin’ it. And I feel good~

the first note is possibly her most important line in the song — sona puts as much passion into as she possibly can, hoping to put on the most unforgettable show of the night. no one will think of her as ‘unforgettable’ after this.

she loses herself in the performance, cherishing every second of it. they’re each doing so well, and she can tell just by looking at them that they deserve to be here. she feels nothing but pride for her teammates, overjoyed that they’ve each made it this far.

Now I feel good 기분 좋아 오늘은 다시 오지 않아 baby 나와 지금 기분 좋아 지금이 아니면 안돼 I feel good good good tonight

다시 한번 더 I feel good

as the song finally draws to a close, sona finds herself overwhelmed with emotions — visibly vulnerable for the first time on stage as her eyes fill up with tears. they’re tears of joy, she thinks, the subtle smile that graces her lips hopefully doing enough to show it.

(to be continued bc i ran out of time)

the choreography to 아슬해 is perhaps the one that she most desires to master, the song already holding a special place in her heart. it’s easily her favorite of luxe’s songs, there isn’t a doubt in her mind. she focuses intently on her reflection in the mirror as she continues to go over the steps, determination in no short supply. though frustration kicks in every now and then, she’s mostly able to keep a level head, not allowing her annoyance to get the best of her.

each correct movement feels like an accomplishment, a proud smile now resting on her lips. while it’s not perfect, she’s grateful to have at least managed to accomplish something. “you got this,” she whispers to herself, taking another sip of her water before placing it back down. now that she has the moves down (for the most part), it’s time to work on perfecting them. she makes her way over to one of her friends, gently nudging them on the shoulder to get their attention.

who are your major influences?

“oh, are all the questions this easy? the first group that comes to mind is brave girls! but i also really like h.a.m’s music, too. mm, and there’s also beyoncé, ariana grande... i like to think i’m influenced by singers with powerful voices,” she finishes, a soft chuckle passing her lips.

how long have you spent preparing for debut?

“ooh, that’s a good question. on one hand, you could say i’ve spent many years preparing? since i’ve always had a big interest in music. but i didn’t start preparing with the company that long ago, obviously.” another soft laugh escapes her. “so i’ll just say that i’ve been preparing long enough that i’m really eager to debut!”

are you excited about debut?

dawon smiles, excitement taking over her features despite the nervousness she continues to feel as their debut date steadily approaches. “yes, i am,” she confirms, eagerly nodding her head. “it’s like... a dream that’s finally coming true. i’ll admit, i’m a little bit nervous, since i think that’s kind of natural, but... i think i’m way more excited, so it’s okay.”

do you regret getting involved in the survival show?

“not at all, no,” she answers honestly, not having to think twice. there isn’t a single part of her that thinks that she’d do anything different if given the chance. “it’s been so life-changing for me, and i think i’m really lucky to have been a part of it at all. i’m... so grateful that so jisub was willing to let me be a part of it. i can’t imagine where i’d be without it, honestly.”

are you currently dating anyone?

“no, i’m not.”

what is your ideal type in a guy?

april 13th, 2018.

it’s the first day of filming, and although she doesn’t know it yet, it’s likely to be the most challenging. the atmosphere is drastically different from the filming for her individual teaser, which she mostly attributes to the presence of the other luxe members. they’re filming together, as a team, and it’s enough to fill her with a sense of companionship. for a moment, she smiles at jihyun, proud to have someone like her as a leader.

the filming goes on for hours, and it’s only natural to assume that the girls are growing tired with each passing hour. she's praying that it won’t show in her performance, relying on her stamina to get her through the day—she owes her team that much. they run through the choreography again and again, desperate to create an end product that’s nothing less than perfect. a fair share of mistakes are made amongst the girls, but dawon believes that it’s only natural; this is their first time filming for a music video, after all.

april 14, 2018.

on the second day of filming, she’s able to feel herself physically relaxing as the fear begins to dwindle, excitement steadily building within her as her confidence thrives. it makes it that much easier to present acceptable facial expressions; expressions that show off her confident and carefree emotions, showing that she was genuinely having a good time. it’s a welcome change from the nervousness that has plagued several of her last evaluations—she hopes that this change of attitude will last, though she isn’t going to place too much faith in it.

april 15, 2018.

the final day of filming is bittersweet. a sense of jealousy eats at her the entire time, knowing that she’s the only girl not to have a story scene to herself. she tries not to let it weigh her down, mentioning it to no one as she meets the cameras with an expected smile. it’s best to keep it to myself, she thinks. they’d just think i was ungrateful. she tries not to feel too down about it, remembering that she’s probably the member that needs to work on her charisma the most—if anything, she wants to use this as motivation, as it reminds her that she still has room to improve. maybe this could be another push in the right direction.

her feelings are mended partially as she films her scenes with the other members, the club scene serving as a much-needed boost to her spirits. not only is she more than pleased with her outfit (which does well to show off the abs she’s worked hard to maintain), but she’s also in love with her hairstyle—she makes a mental note to show her appreciation to the stylists later on. as she and the other girls are dancing around, they all seem to be having a good time—she just hopes that none of them are faking it. on several occasions, it’s already been made clear that some of them get through things like this better than others.

when the filming finally draws to a close, dawon lets out a sigh of relief, heart racing as she thinks of how close they’re becoming to actually debuting. filming for the music video was a major step in that direction, and she can only imagine what the next month has in store for the six of them.