#lumpyrecords

Fried e/M, Modern World (Lumpy / La Vida Es Un Mus, 2020)

A few years back I had an idea for a project where I’d collect pieces of what I called “punk poetry”, but then gave it up because it was too hard to actually define. Rude, dirty, blunt language used in an evocative way? Ugly feelings expressed through ugly words that somehow achieve beauty through shock? Random, drunken ramblings opening windows on profound truths? Yeah, I don’t know. Punk poetry. You get it. Like Fried e/M lyrics.

Of course their unpretentious, sneering, self-deprecatingly funny lyrics wouldn’t work as well if they weren’t backed by snotty hardcore punk in its purest form. “Lobotomy” (“I don’t want no therapy, I just want lobotomy / ‘Cause I can’t deal with being me”) sounds like a ‘Group Sex’ outtake, while “Pleasure OD” beautifully channels the spirit of early Black Flag or the Germs.

I know I’m always going on about nostalgia (I’m not, but I do get annoyed when old fucks try to push that “punk’s not as good as it used to be” shit). In a world where I can type “Dicks” anywhere in any moment and listen to The Originals (well maybe I should add a couple words to that Google search), playing old school-worshipping punk rock requires special talent, and Fried e/M have it. It’s got that dejà-vu feel but in a good way (I had to google “Turquoise Soup" because I thought it was a cover, but it turns out it just sounds like a classic—and I’d heard it on their earlier EP).

Fucking “Capitalist Eyes” sounds like Cheetah Chrome Motherfuckers! “Modern World”? Crucifucks-ian. “You’re an Internet victim of the modern world / I don’t want to be / In this modern world”. Do you get it? “I’m gonna die laughing / Laughing at this world / Laughing at this world I never wanted / Laughing at this world I never needed”. More poetry? “Hippie child better learn to throw a brick”. Are you pacing around your living room shaking your fists and letting out little yelps of approval? I most definitely am.

Click here to listen to Modern World on Bandcamp.

Cruelster, Riot Boys (Lumpy, 2018)

Wherever you come from, whatever your culture is, there’s a strain of dumb in there somewhere. We all have that stupid gene, both personally and as communities. But there’s only one culture that elevated idiocy to an art form, and that’s the culture of the United States of America. Nobody is as good and fun and entertaining at being complete fucking morons as the Americans. Cruelster is a punk band from Cleveland, Ohio and with Riot Boys they distilled a perfect ode to American stupidity.

The album opens with a cold open, like a comedy show, with somebody reading a very detailed and disturbing death threat to the editor of a Captain America comic book. And then the circus starts. 18 minutes of perfect Cleveland punk, whose heritage can definitely be traced back to stalwarts of the Clevo sound like the Homostupids, the Darvocets, or Brainwashed Youth. But Cruelster aren’t just the latest band carrying on the tradition, they’re really giving it a personal spin.

Musically, they’re just fun as fuck. Sounding like a bunch of big macho hardcore guys trying to play spazzy art-punk, they often alternate childish singsong exploits with driving, grotesquely pissed-off KBD-style explosions. But the really interesting part is the lyrics. Using English in creatively basic, ignorant way, they paint little vignettes where stupidity travels to the verge of cruelty.

Far right enthusiasts, soldiers, conspiracy theorists, politicians and local radio nuts pop up on this record in an endless parade of nitwits, it’s like American Gladiators meets Black Mirror—but there’s no sense of superiority in these grooves, this ain’t no American Idiot. The butt of the joke, ultimately, is the heartless, ruthless system. This is like Crass or the Dead Kennedys, but in a world that has to deal with the existence of Alex Jones. Use Riot Boys as a seance to summon your inner dumbfuck through laughter and fight together against the powers that be.

Click here to listen to Riot Boys on YouTube.