#lua rambles

I might be talking the obvious on the next lines, but here we go:

So, i think it maybe be less then it was back in the earlier days of undertale, but the Chara slander is pretty well-know, which is wild to hate them as a character, even more unhinged if you just have their ONLY scene in undertale, at the end of geno route (which i too never played, dont have the guts to kill anyone in this universe).

Like??? Wdym you think the evil one is the child who erase an ALREADY EMPTY WORLD??? You, the player, were the one who cleaned the Underground, who made sure that every single monster wouldnt be spared, choosed violence instead of mercy. You made Frisk's hands become dusty by your own merit. Thats such a odd and dumb thought to have. Media illiteracy at its peak, or in this case, at its lowest.

Anyway, my point is: i feel that most people look past, or at least it doesnt have that much of a discourse, in the fact why Chara did what it did in the main story, why they sacrificed themselfs. Or even the implications on why they end up on Mount Ebott (this goes for Frisk too).

Its said from the start that those who climb it never return. Asriel says they climbed for an unhappy reason, and they hated humanity. Chara went to Mount Ebott to die, for their own choice. How fucked up is for a child go full on suicide, which raise too another question: how bad did humanity/their village treat them? This is a headcanon of mine, but seeing their eye color being not a normal shade to have, and seeing how much humans fear/hate monsters, i believe they were sorta of an outcast in human society, seeing their features in a bad light.

(Ik the red eyes only appear at the epilogue of souless True Pacifist route, but since i came arround some short comic of Chara in regards how they feel about the red eyes it in self-esteem because of most humans reaction to it, that it became my main headcanon. And also adds to the Dreemurr family all having red eyes too. Love a united family <3).

This or their uncanny coldly-racional-ish personality (if they have since the beginning and wasnt a cope mechanism for their trauma) was the motive. But either way, Chara didnt met the kindest humans, and was the starting point of the story game.

Because, of this humanity's hate, of their own selfhate, they fall on Mount Ebott, Asriel find them, the Dreemurr's adopt them. Chara finally find people who care and love them, so its reciprocal.

So reciprocal that Chara its determined to help not just their only family to be happy, but the whole kingdom who welcomed with open arms. They will free monster-kind. They will die for them.

The buttercups incident happens, thats when Chara comes with the idea of sacrificing themselfs for Asriel absorve their soul, break the barrier and free the monsters from the Underground. The plan fails because Chara wants revenge for what humans did to them, to the monsters, to their family, but Asriel doesnt. Some say that it was his hesitation that costs their lifes, but the humans would attack them in one way or the other (Asriel in Boss Monster form didn't do anything to the village, just stand there in a fucking existencial collapse between him and Chara fighting for control, with the former's body in his arms; and yet, they were welcomed with violence in a bat of an eye).

Once saw as hope for human and monsters, the Dreemurr family lost their only children to humanity. Later on, Chara's soul awakes by the player's determination, and on True Pacifist Route, you can't tell where Chara end and where Frisk start in the Asriel bossfight, with Chara's memories flooding Frisk/player's mind as it was their own, to save the main cast and Asriel from its own destruction. Everytime you die in there, when your soul refuses death, its Chara refusing to watch their best friend, their brother, to destroy everything they fought for.

But even in all-gameplay length, Chara its watching you. Accompaning you. Seeing what will be your actions, if you gonna be like the rest of humanity they despise, or someone who they can rest in peace knowing their family its on good hands, or even better, if you will fullfill the promise of freedom of the monster-kind they couldnt do.

"But Asriel says too that Chara wasn't actually a good person" he says that Chara wasnt the GREATEST PERSON, first things first. Between being the greastest and being good are two different things. What we can get of this is: they wasnt that immaculate person he blindly followed the plan with. The intricate master-mind that someones still try to paint Chara as. They werent. They arent. They are good: Chara served as a martyr to the monster's cause, even if themselfs couldnt see the happy ending. If they were truly evil, they would want to limit even more the Underground's life. To them suffer even more without the sunlight, the fresh air, the hope that Surface promised a long time ago.

"Oh but they LAUGHED at Asgore falling ill! Thats so so EVIL!" my sweet summer child, did you ever heard of the concept of a nervous laugh? Its a pretty common cope mechanism to have when you find yourself in a odd situation that neither you or your brain know how to process it. Myself can say it. Lets be real for a minute, Chara for sure doesnt know how to deal with emotions, to process them properly. The majority could say if they saw a loved one falling ill, they would be upset, sad, depressed even. But when you dont know how to take the saddness in? The shock? The fear of almost lost someone you love? You either shutdown entirely or act the opposite you should "normally" react, act in a odd way. They laugh the pain away of an incident that almost make them look alike the humans who trapped monsters on Underground. Nervous on being like them, with monster dust in their hands, betraying their trust. If anything, i would say that moment Chara feared to became what they refer as in the geno run: the demon that comes when people calls its name. And if you come about their creepy faces showing how bad of a person they are, i swear i will myself rip your soul from your being /menacing.

Chara its not a bad person. They can be a secretive plotter, witty beyond their age, with a dry, self-deprecating humor perhaps? Yes. But they loved. Truly loved. Their love was different from yours, it was love too. /ref

It was love to have matching friendship necklaces with Asriel. It was love to exchange their pointless (in their vision) life to the freedom of their beloved ones. It was love to match Toriel's way of speaking. It was love to make humanity pay for its actions to their only family. It was love to do anything on their power to make the Underground happy again.

It was love, in their deathbed, despite the agony of flower poison in throat, deep in their body and blood, with Asriel by their side crying, guilty about the plan; Chara stays determinated. Smiles through the pain.

"Stop that... You big crybaby...

You should be smiling.

You're going...

To be free."

If this isn't love, what is it then?

Despite everything, Chara is a child who learned to love too late, in a twisted way because of their self-destructive way, found their family in the beings considered "evil" by humanity, the same ones who turned the back to Chara. They will protect those who showed care.

If Chara questions you since when you were the one on control, its a satirical quote. You ended this world. Your choices lead to it. In the empty of the Underground, there is nothing more for you, the player, to do, besides face the consequences of your actions. You have no choice on it. You have no control of it anymore. Because its fate was sealed by the last soul you harvest. You had control of changing the narrative before it, you simply didn't care to try.

The real monster was you all along.

And Chara simply is here for you to pay the price. To prevent to the tragedy to repeat yourself. And even if you go back after this, nothing will be the same anymore. They will ensure you dont ever forget it.

His hands were burning hot and a little rough when he gave you another experimental squeeze, pushing both cheeks against each other and letting them bounce apart again, and repeating it all over again.

“You having fun over there?” you mumbled indifferently, flickering to the next page.

You and Eddie had been together long enough that you’d grown used to his antics; to the point that you could easily continue reading your book without giving the light of day, while he… did whatever the hell he was doing.

But then, without warning, you felt him push your buttcheeks aparts and suddenly his face had been pushed against you. Chin scuffing against your slit, while his nose was tightly pressed against your asshole.

“Eds—“

You try to get away, you really do, but all it does is somehow push Eddie’s face deeper into you. A hard slap against your right cheek follows, and the words die on your tongue as you hurriedly toss the book away. You push off the mattress, but he push you back down with a hand on your back — harsh and without mercy.