: of time and dragons :
Sitting at my old desk, ringed by the long-familiar shape of these old walls, I feel displaced in time. The strange juxtaposition of thinking “it’s nice to be here” meets the remembering of why I’m here now in the first place. And my mind turns over like an hourglass recalling these few weeks past, recalling beyond into the deep forest of memory. I tried to remember stories of you and found they were farther in the deep than I thought. And I had to walk past the temporally forgotten hole of happenstance events that make up this cruel last chapter. Cruel and beautiful and I hope holds some sort of hope; of, not happy-ending perfection exactly, but walking beyond bitter ends--of life going on without black-hole timebombs of the past splintering our present history. So tomorrow I say goodbye, with a finality this time that I hope brings the circle round, fits the tail in the dragon’s mouth and heals this story’s fractured life—leaving it as something whole. And we can put this part away not to forget, but to remember and not be held from living.
