Top Posts Tagged with #lost words.

“I can’t believe you talked me into this.”

one of the great things about jangmi was that she obtained control in other ways that didn’t require immense help from others. she had the wits to get her in the places she needed to be and had no problem struggling to get there. in a visual way, she was fighting for herself and that inner flint of desire to seek the perfection she wished to view in the world. whether it was physically or metaphorically, she was keen on building herself up to that point of glory. and yet, despite such seemingly pure intentions, she always seemed to somehow get herself in trouble. when she switched lives with her twin sister the change in location and adaption nearly caused the big secret to be revealed as there were certain specifics the pair didn’t know about each other. or how on occasion she’ll be staying over at someone’s home and realize later on certain people where not informed of her presence and saw it as something secretively sultry or discreetly toxic. but out of all of her unplanned chaotic outcomes and self desires this painted– or shall i say sprayed scenario was one of the more humourous ones. she felt no guilt like always too, and his retort only caused her eyes to obnoxiously roll. how could she forcefully ‘talk him into’ doing something he had the control of determining? she wasn’t that controlling.

and her eyes rolled, those little brown irises swarming in the horizon of her lids as she merely mocked his statement while she was cleaning up the mess they had created. it was a two part crime after all. “are you chickening out now? its already been done.” she was referring to the graffiti on the brick walling, all frugal and colourful. “if you don’t want to sign your name just use some sort of code, like a123. don’t worry, your secret is safe with me.” that last line had her snorting too; who did she even have to tell? no one. “i think it turned out pretty nice though, better than my last attempt at block art.”

#lost words.#animatxr

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“ i don’t go looking for triggers.”

the first idea to spark in her mind was a gun, and not one of those playful ones for horse races, or the cute ones that are used at festive events that pop confetti. or can that even be classified as a gun? either way, let’s just say that the imagery in her mind wasn’t one that was all that pretty or a fun place to be around. in a paraphrase, it was morbid. grotesque and gloomy, nearly resembling the world hades paved before persephone took shelter in his heart. dark paved grounds, black roses with thorns, and a scenery that never saw the light of day. and somehow through all of that imagery she was smiling, gleaming at such tragedy before coming to her senses and realizing she wasn’t alone. he was there again, and this time around it didn’t feel like a teacher-student interaction. it was softer with a burning undertone, the tips of her fingers running along his cheek as if all of her thoughts could evade from something so simplistic. and bam, within seconds her switch was going off again, the length of her fingers forming a gun-like impression that was gifted with a pop of her tongue hitting her cheek for exaggeration. “click clack, boom.”

#lost words.#( this is fluffy for 1 second LMFAO #jiwing

( @jiwing )

“Ah, but you aren’t cruel. You can act cruelly, I believe that, but that isn’t who you are. There’s a difference, no?” Shamelessly, he empties the remaining candies on to the tissue in between them, his almost translucent fingers sorting them into a hierarchy of flavours as he speaks. Lemon, orange, watermelon, blackcurrant and strawberry, in order of his own personal palette. It’s a tedious task that he completes with pedantic preciseness, but when he’s done he sits back with a smile so patient that his eyes are reduced to laughing. Satisfaction. He pops a bright yellow candy into his mouth and it rests against the inside of his cheek as he speaks. “Besides, acting cruelly isn’t ever much fun.”

it was as if the two of them were sinking, falling farther and farther into the elusive pool that her mind had flooded around them. it was discomforting too, the ridges of her spines being met with sensitive chills that caused her to spark upwards and sit more straight. that was how she was raised to sit too, but those days are just a passing memory that doesn’t create any sort of reaction. right now, her only concern is to try and make sense of what he was trying to embrace her on. she felt as if she was sitting in those classroom settings all over again, the teacher organizing their desk while attempting to give her some life advice on what and what not to do. in this scenario those assorted candies were the papers, all neatly categorized on that white tissue paper that acts as a desk. usually she would just walk away from these sorts of settings, dictate that no one knows what they are talking about and it’s just a waste of lung capacity to try and enlighten her with their ideology. yet, in this instance, curiosity tugged at that tingle within her and made her want more. to hear more, almost as if he could make that crucial life vs. death decision for her. it was extremely out of character too, her face turning from a scold to soft irises blooming with hope, a tint of temptation residing on her mouth whenever her lips parted to finally speak. to finally get answers.

so she chose her next actions carefully, her fingers fumbling in her hands that acted like a switch to another realm. one second, calm. another, irritated. another, solemn. she was a switch with multiple outlets and only one capacitor. “what makes you think it isn’t any fun?” the setting now transitioned to one that felt like an interview, the student with her elusive notepad and gear shifting mind ready to drop the bomb any second. in her personal opinion acting cruel was indeed tiring, but also thrilling. she could say and do as she pleased, trample on the content of someone else, and even if the blowup was outrageous she could still bask in that glory of, ‘hey, i owned you.’ and so the questions continue. “what makes a cruel person then? let’s use these candies for example. if i were to tell you that if you keep eating like this you’ll be fat, or if i silently throw them away while thinking the same thought, is there a difference?”

#lost words.#jiwing