C Quackity analysis(??) because I have T H O U G H T S
so so- The song I Dont Like Myself is so cQuackity coded??? Cause like listen and think about it- Quackity is essentially a mirror of everything and everyone that's happened to him. He's taken it in and mirrored it harsher, stronger, bolder. Because he had to to survive.
He came into the server trying to please everyone, seeing the good in people and trying to actively make things better. But that's not how things work around here, and he learns that first hand in his marriage. Schlatt became the thing that defined him. He soured and hardened him because he needed it to survive. Maybe not in a literal sense but he needed to at least emotionally survive that relationship before he ran away to Pogtopia. I'm sure other analysts here have gone into depth on tntduo- But even Karl and Sapnap influenced his growth. He had love, he was content, and Las Nevadas was his love letter to them that they threw out before even opening it. He shut out his feelings, even taught Charlie to never have attachments or trust. Because that's whats gotten him this far right?
He hates himself because if you take away the scar, the Schlatt, the Wilbur, the Dream. Then what's left?
And the thing is, he sees himself as this broken, scarred and dangerous man who created something far too big for anyone to ever fill the shoes of. Even himself. But he doesn't see Tommy that way. Honestly they are so underrated- Tommy, the guy he thinks of as the example of human. He doesn't judge Tommy like that, at least not currently from what I remember.
Quackity hate's everything he is, what he's become and what other people have done to him. But like that empty casino filled with sparkling lights, pristine glassware, and vacant tables, he hides all of it beneath what's comfortable. So he comes back faster, harder, sharper, and meaner than hopefully anything that could come his way.
And he ignores the nights when the phantom taste of his husband's decaying heart on his lips has him sprawled on the floor. He ignores all the burned out cigarettes on his desk, the alcohol bottles next to the three rings he really should have thrown out a long time ago. And he certainly ignores the lone sound of his cries in an artificial desert.
