why should I be speaker of the house? well hold on to your lily-white butts lemme tell you:

- im the calmest $wayiest most meme-ful person out there everyone will have equal time to meme banter without angry shouting from anyone - i know how to deal with tough decisions like I once had to choose between whether I liked mango gelato more than choc chip - im actually not at all biased like i can fully enjoy pizza with or without pineapple - im super approachable so I can sort your problem out real quick (unless time zones form a conspiracy and work against me) - bc i am The Australian i have a really firm grasp on the volatile nature of the political scene like we’ve had 5 prime ministers in the last 3 years and I haven’t gone fully crazy yet and I still have a weird faith in the system 👍

also I promise to wear different awesome shiny ties everyday so like maybe i’ll be the successor to bercow’s current reign on tie fashion

and that’s why #sammyforspeaker will be the most suitable decision for the LE2015 👌