Launce. For thee! ay, who art thou? he hath stayed for a better man than thee.
William Shakespeare: The Complete Works, The Two Gentlemen of Verona (Act III, Scene I)
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Launce. For thee! ay, who art thou? he hath stayed for a better man than thee.
William Shakespeare: The Complete Works, The Two Gentlemen of Verona (Act III, Scene I)

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Proteus. Go, sirrah, and find him out. Come, Valentine.
William Shakespeare: The Complete Works, The Two Gentlemen of Verona (Act III, Scene I)
Launce. I am but a fool, look you; and yet I have the wit to think my master is a kind of a knave but that's all one, if he be but one knave. He lives not now that knows me to be in love; yet I am in love; but a team of horse shall not pluck that from me; nor who 'tis I love; and yet 'tis a woman; but what woman, I will not tell myself; and yet 'tis a milkmaid; yet 'tis not a maid, for sure hath had gossips; yet 'tis a maid, for she is her master's maid, and serves for wages. She hath more qualities than a water-spaniel; which is much in a bare Christian. [Pulling out a paper.] Here is the catelog of her condition. 'Imprimis: She can fetch and carry.' Why, a horse can do no more: nay, a horse cannot fetch, but only carry; therefore, is she better than a jade. 'Item: She can milk;' look you, a sweet virtue in a maid with clean hands.
William Shakespeare: The Complete Works, The Two Gentlemen of Verona (Act III, Scene I)
Speed. Launce! by mine honesty, welcome to Milan!
William Shakespeare: The Complete Works, The Two Gentlemen of Verona (Act II, Scene V)
Launce
noun
another term for sand eel.

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Ok but can you imagine T.J. Miller as a modern-day Launce, walking around with his ill-behaved dog and taking the fall for it peeing on people’s legs?