The continent of Lasvan, where the story begins.
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The continent of Lasvan, where the story begins.

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"I don't know how you're sleeping through this." Percy mumbled beneath his breath, fingers flexing on the steering wheel as his eyes stayed trained to the road ahead. In broad day light with wind roaring with the windows down and music blasting to keep Percy awake, somehow Leo managed to stay fast asleep. On one hand, Percy was sympathetic because Leo had driven through the entire night, but on the other side, he was terrified that he had to drive alone. He'd grown too used to having Leo's voice in his ear, breath warm and words soothing and that growing ever familiar feeling of being safe. "You're unbelievable, you know that?"
Leo was, and possibly always would be, someone that Percy couldn't understand. There he was, attractive and friendly and approachable, wasting his time with a man who didn't even like to leave his own house let alone make friends or try new foods or even visit the dentist that he'd had since he was six years old. Percy saw no reason for Leo to stay, yet he did and that was what made him a mystery.
"I'm never going to understand you. I'm not going to understand what you see in me that makes you go: Yeah, this one is worth it." A hollow laugh passed his lips at the though of actually being enough in his current state. "I'm not worth it. I'm never going to be 'normal'. I'm always going to cringe when you try to hold my hand and we're always going to have to do things on my terms because if we don't, I'll freak out. I'm going to be afraid of things that you think are so dumb. So, you should really stop wasting your time. I'm not going to change." He wanted to. Percy longed to be different so badly day in and out. It was almost a tangible want at this point. There wasn't much hope as he saw it. He resolved to being this person as he was now and as disappointing a thought as that was, he accepted it.
âYou're kidding, right? That's bullshit.â
"Itâs not. Its a legitimate fear!" The blonde hissed, planting his feet more firmly into the soft earth. Percy was terrified. This was proven in his wide eyes and his set jaw and trembling hands. There were many things that Leo could convince him to do, but this was where he drew the line. Percy had developed a slightly unnatural fear of large bodies of water as a child after watching Titanic. âYou cannot make me do this. Itâs not bullshit. Iâm scared. I donât want to do this.â
He was fully aware that he was making a scene before everyone. Percy could feel the judgmental looks or hear the concerned thoughts from sympathisers. He was also fully aware of his boyfriendâs disappointment with him. Percy felt so small, like such a waste even though he barely took up any space and there was no real point for him to be there. It had never been promised that he would swim. Not once had he agreed to getting into the water and when his blue eyes fell upon water that matched in shade and hue, all Percy could think about was getting lost beneath the surface. Heâd heard stories of drowning or being pulled under by current or water just turning on people. He knew there wasnât a current to a lake, but that didnât stop him from worrying.
Percy hated the insistent way Leo tugged on his arms and the angry yet pleading look in those deep brown eyes that the blonde had come to love and succumb to. âBaby,â Percy begged softly, âplease donât make me do this.â He knew that it must have been hard to deal with someone like him: a person afraid of everything. He needed this though. Percy needed to know that Leo wasnât just going to force him into doing things that he didnât want to just because the other male didnât understand his fears.
Leo didnât seem to listen this time or maybe he was fed up with waiting for Percy to magically become better. Percy wasnât quite sure what happened after panic set in at the feel of mud sliding across the soles of his feet. He remembered the hammering of his heart in his chest and the white noise that filled his ears to deafen him to everything else and then nothing. When he came too, Leo was standing over him with his hand over his nose, blood staining his fingers, and Percy was on the ground and his knuckles were throbbing. He vaguely could hear someone say that Leo deserved it, that he wasnât being fair, but Percy just felt sick inside because once again his fear had ruined any chance of him actually living.
âI caught the bouquet, do you know what that means?â for lasvan
His first thought should have been a response, but all Percy could focus on was the rampant beat of his heart and the rising fear that Leo was going to kiss him. It was such a dirty thought. He had no idea where the otherâs mouth had been. Had Leo brushed his teeth? Did he chew on objects that had been touched by hands? Did he floss? None of the thoughts were particularly sexy, because face it that Percy was not the least bit sexually inclined, and only added to his anxiety. He did not want to be kissed. At the same time, though, he really wanted to be kissed. Percy wanted to take that crippling fear that kept his body frozen and weak and destroy it. In the time that heâd known Leo, the blonde had found that he liked to be touched and the heated trails that the brunetteâs hands left on him were a welcome fire on his skin.
Backed up against a wall and trapped with Leoâs body only centimetres from his, Percy wasnât sure which thought to go with. He couldnât get his throat to work. Lumps were forming and his mouth was drying out to make the blonde work just to breathe. This was torture.
"U-uhm, that youâre going to be married very soon?" He laughed nervously, ducking beneath a perfectly tanned arm and trying not to imagine what it would feel like wrapped around his body. "Iâm sure some⌠girl would be very happy about that." Percy knew he was being an idiot. He couldnât help it. As far as he knew, Leo didnât like women, wasnât interested in them, but he would rather feign ignorance than fall prey to the relentless flirting and leave the comfort of the bubble the male had made for himself. Leo was always testing his limits, but this was not one heâd easily push past. It went past fear, it was practically a phobia. The sheer thought of being with someone in any physical sense had him wanting to hide or vomit or cry or scream or run or a combination of the actions.
"Congrats. You know. Good for you. Iâm proud. Arenât you proud? Do you hear that? Wow, I hear someone calling my name. Damn, that sounds like my mum. Canât keep her waiting, you know? Iâll see you âround, yeah? Okay, bye!"
There was only a hint of shame in Percy admitting that he full on ran away.
Terrified; I'll cling to you forever.
- a six word story for brownie #2

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