#lapse

Harry didn’t like her. But to be fair, she didn’t like him either. For albeit stupid reasons on both their parts that had prolonged throughout their lives. She was best friends with Eleanor. By proxy Eleanor’s boyfriend Louis and his circle of friends were therefore inextricably linked to her. Which meant she and Harry were around each other.

A lot.

To everyone’s dismay.

It was an offhanded comment, one that Harry never should have made but it soured her to pieces. “Only an idiot would do something like that,” he said, quietly. Only Louis overheard.

And her.

That was Harry’s mistake.

But she wouldn’t take it lying down. Harry could call her stupid all he wanted; she wouldn’t let anyone get away with saying it to her. So she told him off.

It was probably the first time in his life anyone had ever stood up to him. She found that when people were attractive, they were more likely to get away with bullshit that others would put up with even though they didn’t need to. Someone like Harry was more likely to say whatever he wanted and just assumed no one would tell him off because he was pretty.

Harry shouldn’t have called her an idiot. It wasn’t kind. Maybe he was jealous because honestly, watching her follow her passion was admirable and if the light hit her just right maybe he would have agreed that she was cool for doing what she wanted despite all the naysayers like him.

Even if it was embarrassing to be told off in front of their friends.

“Damn,” Louis whispered making everyone snicker. Harry was fuming. His eyes practically turned red with anger while he glared at her.

So, they weren’t friendly.

But given they were stuck in one another’s lives they learned to be... cordial. As cordial as two people could be when she absolutely wanted to claw his eyes out.

*

An hour.

That was how long she waited inside before she realized it was no use. No new messages, no phone calls. Nothing.

For whatever reason, she imagined Harry’s smug smile saying something to the effect of “I told y’were an idiot.”

It fueled her anger, and she silently blamed him for her date’s inability to appear. Which made no sense at all. Harry had no idea she was even on a date. But she had waited too long and honestly couldn’t disagree with the British voice mocking her inside her head. She was an idiot for waiting so long.

Her phone gave her more disappointing news but she was grateful she had service.

“Hey, uh... Uber is going to be... a wait,” she mumbled quietly standing just inside the entryway of the restaurant she had stayed at far longer than any sane person would have. “I know you’re on a date, I’m so sorry. I just... any chance you’re around to come get me?” She asked through her phone. The anxiety filled her lungs and a single tear rolled down her cheek. It was so typical that she didn’t have anyone to come get her.

“Oh, babe, I’m so sorry. Louis and I have been drinking and—”

She nodded, closing her eyes. She knew it was a long shot. If it were any other time, she had no doubt Eleanor and Louis would be there for her. “Oh, you know what,” she laughed quietly. “The app just updated their time. They’ll only be five minutes,” she assured her. “Sorry to bother you,” she sighed looking at the time on the app that increased by another half hour.

“Not at all, you know I’d be there as soon as I could,” Eleanor assured her.

She texted her mom, her sister, even her sister’s boyfriend and was met with no response from any party. Her toes were numb from the chill in the air and uncomfortable shoes. It was unfair. No one was there for her when she needed them. Ever. It sounded so dramatic but it was true. She wanted one nice thing. She wanted a nice date. A night out. It wasn't supposed to be hard.

Anxiety rolled through her with each passing second on the cold street. Her throat felt tight as she scrolled through her contacts one last time and realized there was one and only option left. But she sure as hell wasn't going to call him.

Are you busy?

Is this a joke?

Well, that was a short-lived idea. God, he was the worst.

Forget it.

What? Your date stood you up?

I said FORGET IT.

Why did you text me, then?

Lapse in judgment. Won’t happen again.

Her phone illuminated with Harry’s contact, no picture. Just his name. Not even an emoji to recognize she had known him for ten years. She may as well have had his number for no longer than a week. “What?” She snapped.

He snorted. “Let’s get it straight, love. You contacted me.”

“And I told you to, ‘forget it.’”

“Are y’seriously that stubborn y’won’t tell me?”

“No, I’m not stubborn,” she was very much so stubborn. “I will not let you berate me and call me stupid or make fun of me for going on a fucking date. I needed help and I will admit. I was stupid to call you thinking you would do anything but sit on your throne of self-adoration and help someone else. As I said, it was a lapse in judgment. Good. Bye.”

*

With an invigorated sense of frustration and anger, she had determined walking was her best bet. It had only been five minutes since she spoke to him. Her feet were aching, the chill gripping every inch of her body, when a car slowed beside her. It parked and she heard the door open. She didn’t turn around. Anxiety crept through her veins. Her heart pounded heavily in her chest, and she tried to remember the self-defense moves she had learned in a seminar put on by her dorm her freshman year of college.

“How much for an hour?” Harry’s voice cut through the cold air. She wanted to be mad. Wanted to snap something at him. But the relief crushed her; she couldn’t help but feel grateful for his familiar voice.

“You couldn’t afford me,” she grumbled turning back toward him. He was leaning against the side of his car—just by the front wheel. Ankles crossed; hands stuffed in the pockets of his jacket. He looked like a model for either the car or his coat. Hell, he could have been a model for the laces of his shoes. He was utterly beautiful.

He scanned her up and down. “S’that how you dress for all your first dates?”

“Shut the fuck up, Harry,” she muttered. A blush painted her cheeks as he scanned her. It felt so judgmental she wanted to punch him. She stood in front of him several feet away, eyeing him suspiciously. She didn’t know how he knew where she was. Didn’t know why he even decided to show up. Honestly, she thought maybe he was just driving around and was going to just get back in his car and leave her.

He snorted, scuffed the bottom of his shoe on the sidewalk. “You look nice.”

“Nice?” She repeated. “Is this a joke?”

“A lapse in judgment,” he rolled his eyes. “Are you getting in or what?” He asked pushing himself off his car and opening the passenger door.

“Why did you even come here?” She asked. The warmth from his car hit her like a blanket and she wanted nothing more than to dive in and snuggle into the front seat, blast the hot air at her toes, and fall asleep against the heated seat he knew she had from all the times Eleanor talked about it.

But she was stubborn.

“Obviously it was a mistake,” he closed the door again and made his way toward the driver’s side. “Could leave you here instead,” he shrugged eyeing her over the top of his car. Like a game of chess. It was her move. She glared at him and put her hand on the car handle. He locked the door as she pulled and smirked at her. “So easy,” he mumbled.

She thought taking her chances walking would be better—her toes were going to fall off and the numbness was creeping up her ankles and making way for her legs. “Oh, forget it,” she grumbled and stalked back down the sidewalk.

Harry groaned as if truly pained by her existence. “Oh, for God’s sake, love! It was a joke,” he was by her side before she had taken ten full steps.

“What are you doing here, Harry? Huh? Just here to rub salt in the wound? I got stood up, okay? You were right. Happy? I just wanted to—”

“Idiot.”

Fury pulsed through her at his interruption. At the insult. She slapped his cheek before she could say anything else. Before she could think of anything else. His head was still turned to the side when she marched further down the street without waiting to see his reaction. The numbness of her legs didn’t deter her. The heat of her embarrassment flooded her and warmed her plenty to make it somewhere nearby that would have more accessible Ubers.

“What the fuck was that?” He snarled, grabbing her wrist and spinning her around. It shouldn't have been a surprise he caught up to her so rapidly.

“You called me an idiot,” she snapped back.

He chuckled darkly. His grip tightened on her wrist, and he shook his head. The laugh hadn’t a trace of humor in it. “He. Your date. He’s an idiot.” She glared at him waiting for him to make another joke at her expense, but it never came. They stood still on the sidewalk. Harry’s hand holding her wrist like she might bolt at any second. Lord knew she was thinking about it. His gaze didn’t stray from hers. Intense.

And really fucking beautiful.

“Get in the car,” he ordered.

Which she didn’t take kindly to. “I’ll take my chances,” she sniffed and tugged, trying to release his grip. He didn’t budge, not even a millimeter.

“M’not asking,” his voice was low. “Get in the car, or I’ll drag y’in,” he promised.

“You wouldn’t.”

“Try me, love.”

The thought of Harry dragging her in the car didn’t seem like a good idea. It would only embarrass her further. “Why did you even come here? I told you to forget it,” she muttered.

He opened the passenger door and the warmth once more enveloped her like a hug. He gently touched her shoulder. She turned in the space between the opening of his car and Harry. He stared at her again. “You called me,” his voice was gentle. Unlike anything he had ever heard from him—especially directed toward her. There was no shrug, no indifference, no irritation. He was breathing evenly. As if they had done this a thousand times. As if he looked at her like she was... precious all the time.

There was a thud in her chest, her heart stuttered unevenly against her ribs. Her lips parted and she didn’t know what to say or do. Her toes weren’t numb anymore. She wasn’t cold. There was a silence that filled the space between them as he stared at her and part of her believed if they just never spoke again maybe they could be friends.

“If some idiot guy can’t see how special you are then s’his loss. Only his loss. Standing up anyone is horrible. Standing you up...someone so pretty, so intelligent, so kind, should be a crime.” The words escaped her. The air in her lungs was gone. “M’always gonna be there for you,” it felt like a trap to let him say something like that to her. His hand reached up from his side, he brushed the back of his fingers along her cheek. “I don’t know what happened, love,” he murmured. “I... I was so worried. And I truly would pity the person that tries t’take you on,” a smile danced at the corner of his lips. It wasn’t smug. It was beautiful and melted her further and it wasn’t even a full smile. “And I was still so worried... I jus’,” he shook his head. “I think I ran two stoplights,” he admitted. “S’like a switch flipped, love. Never been so worried ‘bout anyone like that,” he continued holding her gaze.

She bit her lip and looked at his chest. “Are you fucking with me?” She asked quietly. Her voice defensive but low. Afraid to believe him.

But more afraid to not believe him.

“No, love. Not even a little... well, jus’ the part ‘bout taking you on. S’quite the slap y’gave me,” his smile grew, and he rubbed his cheek as if it really hurt him. Maybe it stung, but she didn’t think it really was all that hard.

“Been like ten years of build up to that.”

He chuckled quietly. “S’all you could muster?” He challenged.

She rolled her eyes. “Thank you,” she whispered. Genuinely. It felt weird to say it to Harry. Felt weird to be in such a position. But she couldn't help but feel that she liked it.

“Always, love. And I meant it. Y’look beautiful.”

Her heart was doing things that she didn't know Harry could do to her. She blushed, looked at her shoes; her toes numbing in the chilly air. “Well, his loss right?”

“My gain,” he winked at her and gave her arm a gentle squeeze as he left her side of his car for the driver’s side.

“Have you just been jealous all this time?” She asked as he settled behind the wheel.

“No,” he rolled his eyes. The silence was companionable. The first time in knowing Harry that it felt anything other than hostile. “Maybe,” he mumbled.

“Maybe?” Her eyes were delighted, and she smiled at him. “You like me.”

“Oh, bite me,” he grumbled. “I do not.”

“You so like me,” she teased. Her cheeks were warm making her forget about the cold. He didn’t say anything. Just the gentle hum of the road filled the car. “For what it’s worth, I like you too,” she murmured tucking herself to turn sideways in the seat. Her face squished against the back of the warm seat. “Probably more than a lot,” she admitted. “I guess," she took a deep breath, scared to say it, but Harry had called her pretty, intelligent, and kind. She couldn't let that go unnoticed. Her declaration wasn't as pretty as his but she needed to say something. "I think my brain mixed up my emotions. I was... very unhappy that you didn’t like me all these years.”

“God, love, you're ridiculous,” he grabbed her hand without moving his eyes from the road. He squeezed her fingers but it felt tied directly to her heart. “How could I not like you?"

--

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-Uses He/They/It

-Head canon voice: N/A

-Used to be a Geno. Doesn’t really remember his past, as he lost most of his memories when he got to the anti-void. Knows he used to be a Geno, and given he’s seen what other Geno’s have been through he can piece together what he went through. Doesn’t feel that bothered by it though, as mentioned, he doesn’t remember it.

-Has Haphephobia, may glitch more or even ‘reboot’ when touched, as well as panicking when touched. When it comes to fights, being touched will slow him down/create openings, but will make him angrier/fight like a caged animal and lash out. Normally does his best to avoid others in a fight, fighting from a distance. Doesn’t have anyone he’s willing to let touch him. And doesn’t plan to try to confront his phobia either.

-Immortal in a fashion. Can die/be hurt, just respawns back in the anti-void. If he gets badly injured he’d let himself die somehow to basically get ‘healed’. Very few things could actually put a stop to him. Such as other’s in the ‘guardian’ role. When he does respawn, he’s unable to open portals for at least 10 hours (au time, not anti-void time), paired with the fact his magic output is effected for about a day.

-The liquid in the tanks on his back is produced by the Core, which he takes from any au. He needs to breathe in this chemical, or he will struggle to function. This also helps him to form stronger strings, and even cause the strings to be highly flammable, when the strings are set ablaze it lets off a toxic gas that if people are exposed to it for more than 5 min (sooner with breathing quicker/from fighting/etc) they will start to hallucinate and cause magic to become unstable, it will slow down movement/reaction times, and if spent even longer around the gas it can cause death by poisons gas. The strings still have soul manipulation too.

-Needs to wear glasses, but never really does. Has terrible vision. Even close things are quite blurry. So for the most part may not recognize people via looks, unless they have a very distinct look/colours/etc. So even if he’s on decent terms with someone he may act aggressive when they meet again, due to not recognizing them.

-Glitches all over his body, glitches can take over his eyes/etc. May happen often, normally just an annoyance for him.

-Paired with the body glitches, he also glitches when he speaks, making it sometimes hard to tell what he’s saying. His voice is fairly loud, and he tends to use slang/etc. 

-Basically the biggest hater known to man. Hates everyone. Basically everyone hates him back. At this point he's just hating for the love of the game. Will go out of his way to ruin someone else's day.

-Has a very malicious but playful personality. Loves poking fun at others and just generally being a jerk. But also loves to make his own fun.

-Very easy to rage bait. Gets mad at most things. Hard to calm though.

-Very impulsive and reactive. A sort of ‘leap first think later’ sort of mindset. Due to not really having many consequences for ‘dying’, and also he just thinks planning things isn’t as fun. Just likes to go with whatever is happening. Though hates when things go out of control, so most situations he ends up putting himself in via not planning tend to annoy him. 

-Huge ego, thinks he’s better than everyone else. Even if they can beat him in a fight/game/etc, still will think he’s better than them. Kinda insurable with it.

-Competitive. If annoyed/pushed enough can be brought into games/deals/bets/etc. 

-Embarrassing him makes him ‘reboot’ for quite a while. If he gets really embarrassed he can ‘reboot’ multiple times in a row.

-Loves spreading misinformation/just lying in general. No one should take what he says seriously, as most of it is not true, a stretch of the truth. A sort of “My source is I made it the fuck up”.

-Despite basically hating everyone, he does actually get lonely sometimes. Though doesn’t feel it frequently. Most of the time tends to dismiss the feeling. 

-Can have brief moments where he’s a lot more reasonable/less murderous. Normally when he’s in the anti-void and is in a particularly good mood. He’s maybe more willing to hear people out.

-Likes cute things, well when he can actually see the cute thing, either it being big/coherent enough for him to see. Or when he actually puts on his glasses.

-Wants to destroy all the aus/outcodes/anomalies. It’s his end goal, he also knows he is an anomaly as well, says it’s his duty to get rid of other anomalies. It’s like something in his head constantly screaming at him to destroy. Though there's been a good few times when he’s tried to fight back on that voice, or actively procrastinates destroying specific aus. He also deep down knows it is almost an impossible task to destroy all the aus. But still tries anyway.

-Tends to get weird obsessions with aus that act more like tv shows, e.g. undernovela. Says “I’ll destroy them later…”, but has never actually gotten around to destroying them.

-Common enemy of both Token Core and Memento Cadre. The two teams may even briefly work together to try to repel him from an au.

-His anti-void has his strings everywhere, hanging from the ‘ceiling’ on the ground/etc. It’s like a mess of spiderwebs, if touching connected ‘webs’ he can sense if anyone else touches it. Is also willing to set all these stings on fire for defence/to attack someone. Knows he can just replace them. There's that many strings that if they were to be lit, the toxic gas from the strings could easily kill those that don't have any sort of defence against the gas.

-Can do Stitching/crochet. Never uses his own stings due to their flammable/toxic properties, so tends to steal from aus for his hobby.

-Due to needing to get the liquid, for the tanks on his back, from the core, he often smells like magma due to the Hotlands/core. 

-Steals things often, half the time the anti-void looks like a bomb of random items went off in it. Will steal things on impulse even if he doesn’t need it/knows he won’t like it. Just the concept of having something is what makes him steal.

-Needs more sleep than most. But tries to stay up often, mainly because he’s watching an au, e.g. undernovela and doesn’t want to miss anything. So ends up crashing/getting knocked out for a while. 

-Sometimes may get a light phantom pain from where his scar used to be as a Geno. Normally it’s a dull ache and tends to annoy him more than anything. Though if anyone was to cause a wound on top of where the scar used to be it causes the pain to be intense. 

-

____________

Inspos:

-These two mood boards

-His legs were semi-based off of Nekomata from zzz's legs.

-Undertale's CORE

-The og Error (By LoverofPiggies), and the fandom’s interpretation of him