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I think priests make excellent pillow princes! ^_^
I mean, they're such good boys for their god, and with Lent being so close to being done, so many of them have been abstaining from things they love doing for weeks! they deserve a reward, don't they? being pushed into the pillows and shown just how much pleasure the Lord wants them to feel sounds good to me
come over to my place for a sleepover on Holy Thursday, won't you Father?
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"Lambchop? 'I won't bite?' He's totally flirting with you."
"He's a priest, men of the cloth don't 'flirt' with anyone. They take a vow of celibacy, remember? This whole plan of yours is silly, he's not gay."
"He's not a good little priest though, is he? I told you what that freak does in his shed. And he's definitely not celibate."
"I'm more inclined to believe him than you. You won't even tell me your name."
"You're going in for an exorcism, why would I tell you my name?"
"I'm going in to see what he'll do when we're locked in a room together, to prove he's a normal priest so you can shut your mouth."
Listen hear me out HEAR ME OUT
Giving a priest a tattoo.
Something small, something easily hidden from his flock. Maybe a snake on his ribs, maybe a dice on his thigh. Nobody else knows it's there, except you, him, and most importantly, God.
Tattoos have literally been around since at least Otzi the Iceman. There's no way getting a tattoo is sinful, the church just claims it is because it's The Catholic Church (see: The Crusades). It's about power, control, and that's exactly what it is now, as I put this needle in your skin.
Maybe it's done with a gun, but it's much more likely to be a stick and poke. Sit still Father, you'll mess up the design, then I'd have to start over, wouldn't I? I don't want to have to tie you up. Are you crying? I thought you were a big, strong, superior man of God. You can't handle a little needle? Christ took three nails, you can handle this. Yes Father, say that prayer again, it always gets me hard.
Mmm… so that’s how you want it…” the priest murmurs, leaning closer to you and lightly tracing his finger up your chest until it reaches your chin. He looks at you with a smirk, tilting his head to the side as if considering what he’s about to say one last time. “You wanted to fuck a priest… and I happen to want to be fucked soo badly today. Sooo… pretty please, that’s what you wanna hear, lamb?”
"nooo nonono that's not all I want to hear Father, I want to hear every little sound you make when you're begging to be taken over the edge." The lamb reaches his hands down to grab you by the hips as he leans his face into your neck. "But, it's a very good start Father. If you want fucked soo bad as you claim, kneel."
I'd ask you to forgive me Father, I'd go to confession if I believed you were a holy man. But you're really not, are you? Not holy in any way the church you work in would agree with. What a hypocrite you are, preaching their words when they burn your tongue to say them. I know that dirt on your knees isn't from the church garden, though we both know how you like to "garden." Father, why don't you admit to it? Confess to me. At least I'll answer.
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I think we should try another exorcism, maybe I should take this approach from your mouth and spell the prayers out with more consideration on my tongue this time. Please ignore how I taste like cherry coke and rum. -🍏
"I'm up for another."
keeping this ask like a get out of jail free card
priests are usually so easy. go to confession a few times, show up in the middle of the night with the whole "I'm hearing voices, please help me Father." schtick. It's not entirely untrue, I do hear him sometimes after a feeding. Get them to walk me home so I can feed somewhere different than a church. Mama would be so disappointed if I defiled sacred grounds like that, she was always so devout.
This one is just different though. He certainly gets him talking. Let me sleep in his home too. Kept a very specific kind of lock on his bedroom door, and he smells like rain sometimes... how odd.
