#kwon si-won

The warehouse was quiet, the only noise being the occasional clink of metal and the cold winter air whistle.

I walk further into the space, hearing...nothing, which is weird because they usually can't go 10 minutes without bickering or play fighting.

I go up to the second floor, finding both of them asleep on the floor mattress.

I smile at the sight before taking out my phone from my pocket, turning it up to full volume and playing a loud Alarm sound.

Si-won sits up startled and Hye-ryung rolls off the mattress entirely and i swear i hear a thud. I laugh and turn to sound off. Si-won throws a pillow at me while muttering what sounds like "asshole" and Hye-ryung sits up rubbing her cranium like she just fell 20 feet.

I catch the pillow and throw it back at Si-won as i go closer to the mattress.

"What was that for" Hye-ryung asks in a whiny tone with a pout.

"It's 7:40 am, school starts in like 20 minutes." I state with an almost amused tone.

"And?" Si-won grumbles, sitting up entirely and running a hand through her bed-head.

I squint as i look between the two.

"We kinda sorta have to be there?'" I say incredulously while flailing my arms up and down to highlight im in uniform.

Si-won rolls her eyes because in all reality she doesn't really give a shit.

I glare at them.

"Get up, get dressed and LETS GO" I say as i get their uniforms from the closet and throw it at them.

Si-won catches hers and glares at me before getting up to go change while Hye-ryungs's hits her square in the face, making her huff before she too stands up to go get dressed.

I plop onto the mattress and close my eyes, waiting for them to finish getting dressed.

I feel the bed dip beside me and a slight weight on my arm and from the scent of sharp woody perfume I can tell it's Si-won.

I open my my eyes and turn my head to find her staring at me, her eyes softer than I've seen them before.

"Yes?" I ask as I see her eyes dart over my face.

"Nothing" She mumbles and stays like that for a few seconds before sitting up when the bathroom door opens and Hye-ryung steps out.

The walk to school was unusually quiet.

Not completely silent, Hye-ryung was still half asleep and complaining about the cold, while Si-won occasionally threw in a sarcastic remark, but something felt different.

Wrong.

I noticed it more when we reached the school gates.

Hye-ryung naturally moved closer to my side, hooking her arm through mine as she yawned.

Si-won's expression immediately hardened.

It was subtle. Most people wouldn't have noticed but I did.

Because I'd been noticing it for months.

The little glances, the tense smiles, the way conversations died whenever one of them felt left out.

They had been best friends for years, practically attached at the hip when I first met them.

Now it felt like they were standing on opposite ends of a rope, both pulling until it threatened to snap. And somehow I'd ended up in the middle.

"You're walking too slow," Si-won said flatly.

"I'm literally walking beside him," Hye-ryung shot back, irritation bubbling beneath her tone.

"Yeah, because you're dragging him down."

Hye-ryung tightened her grip on my arm.

"Oh? Since when did you care how fast he walks?"

There it was.

That edge.

The one that hadn't existed before.

I sighed.

The rest of the walk continued like that.

Small comments.

Tiny jabs.

Each one harmless on its own.

But together they formed a crack that kept getting wider.

By lunchtime it felt like my skull was being smacked against the great wall of China repeatedly.

It's a never ending cycle.

in 1st period, Hye-ryung shows me something funny on her phone, Si-won interjects and labels it a bore.

2nd period, Si-won shows me the progress on her app for the contest and Hye-ryung somehow manages to point out flaws in the code meanwhile this girl knows damn near nothing about coding.

I am fucking exhausted at this point.

I sit across from them at our usual lunch table, looking between them like their proximity to each other is a ticking timebomb as i pick at my food.

Si-won and her perceptive, or just paranoid, self clocks it first.

"Whats wrong with you?"

She questions, which makes Hye-ryung look up from her phone towards me.

"Hm? Nothing's wrong"

"You're a terrible liar."

I look up from my lunch.

Si-won is staring at me like she's conducting a police interrogation.

Hye-ryung leans forward.

"Wait, really? I thought he was pretty good at lying."

"No," Si-won says immediately. "His left eye twitches."

"My left eye does not twitch." I feel the muscle in my left eyelid twitch.

"It literally just did."

I hate that she's right.

Hye-ryung bursts out laughing.

"Wait, that's actually kind of cute."

"Cute?" Si-won repeats.

The word comes out sharper than intended.

Hye-ryung raises an eyebrow.

"What?"

"Nothing."

"Right."

And there it is again.

That weird tension.

That invisible line neither of them seems willing to cross, yet neither can stop poking at.

I sigh and lean back in my chair, staring at the ceiling like whatever god is up there will extract me from this mess.

"Seriously what's wrong with you"

Si-won asks again, in a tone ive never heard before, its soft almost caring.

I look back towards them, to find Hye-ryung already staring at her in disbelief, because Si-won doesn't do "soft and vulnerable".

"What, youre looking at me like i just grew three heads?"

She asks, irritated at being the spotlight of our attention.

Hye-ryung simply arches an eyebrow and goes back to picking at her food, more aggressively now.

I open my mouth then close it, choosing to preserve my peace and mental health.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

As the last bell rings, students pack up to go home or go to extra-curriculars. I go down to the gym, where we meet up after school to discuss plans.

I see them on the bleachers, distance between them as they do their own thing instead of chatting like usual.

I stand in front of them, they look up simultaneously.

Hye-ryung smiles and the corner of Si-won's lips quirk upward before she schools her features.

"You coming to coding today?"

Si-won asks, her tone flat and monotone as always.

Hye-ryungs face drops slightly.

I sigh.

"You good to walk home alone?"

I ask Hye-ryung.

"Uh-yeah, sure"

I sigh.

"You good to walk home alone?"

I ask Hye-ryung.

"Uh-yeah, sure."

The answer comes too quickly.

Too forced.

I glance at Si-won.

Her face is unreadable, but the way her fingers tighten around her backpack strap tells me everything.

Neither of them wants to be the one left behind.

And somehow, every day, that's exactly what ends up happening.

I drag a hand down my face.

"No."

Both of them blink.

"No?" Hye-ryung repeats.

"No," I say again. "We're not doing this."

Si-won frowns.

"Doing what?"

"This."

I gesture vaguely between them.

"The weird passive-aggressive bullshit."

Silence.

The gym suddenly feels a lot bigger.

A lot quieter.

Hye-ryung looks away first.

Si-won folds her arms.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Really?" I deadpan.

Neither answers.

"Because from where I'm standing, you two have spent the last six months trying to kill each other with increasingly creative comments."

"We have not," Hye-ryung says.

"You literally criticized her coding project."

"It had bugs."

"You don't know coding."

"It looked buggy."

Si-won snorts.

"See?"

"See what?" Hye-ryung snaps.

"Exactly what he means."

"Oh, so now you're agreeing with him?"

"I'm agreeing with reality."

"And there you go again."

Their voices rise.

The argument building like a storm cloud.

I point at them.

"Stop."

They stop.

Mostly because neither expected me to raise my voice.

I take a breath.

Then another.

"You guys used to be best friends."

Neither says anything.

"You were practically attached at the hip."

Still nothing.

"So what happened?"

For a moment, nobody speaks.

The question hangs in the air.

Heavy.

Uncomfortable.

Then Hye-ryung laughs.

A short, bitter sound.

"Ask her."

Si-won's jaw tightens.

"Why me?"

"Because you're the one who started acting weird."

"Me?"

Her eyes widen.

"You're blaming me?"

"Well it wasn't me."

"Oh, please."

The dam finally breaks.

"You started getting jealous every time I spent time with him."

Hye-ryung immediately stands.

"Jealous?"

The word echoes through the gym.

Her face burns red.

"Are you insane?"

"You literally cling to him every chance you get."

"And you don't?"

"At least I'm not obvious about it."

The second the words leave her mouth, Si-won's eyes widen.

Like she wishes she could shove them back in.

The gym goes silent.

My brain stops working.

Hye-ryung freezes.

"...What?"

Si-won looks away.

For maybe the first time since I've known her.

She looks nervous.

Actually nervous.

"Oh my god."

Hye-ryung stares.

Then points.

"You like him."

"No."

"You do."

"No."

"You literally do."

"I literally don't."

"You absolutely do."

The argument has somehow evolved into something much, much worse.

I look toward the gym doors.

Briefly considering whether I can sprint away and start a new life somewhere else.

Maybe Canada.

Unfortunately, Hye-ryung isn't finished.

Because she suddenly goes quiet.

Dangerously quiet.

Then she laughs.

A little too loudly.

"Wow."

Si-won narrows her eyes.

"What?"

"Nothing."

"Say it."

Hye-ryung crosses her arms.

A smile pulling at her lips.

One that looks suspiciously nervous.

"Oh, it's just funny."

"What's funny?"

Hye-ryung hesitates.

For half a second.

Then mutters:

"Because I thought I was the only one."

My soul leaves my body.

Gone.

Ascended.

Evaporated.

Reduced to atoms.

The silence that follows is catastrophic.

Si-won stares.

Hye-ryung stares.

I stare at the wall because it's the only thing in this room that isn't actively ruining my life.

Nobody speaks for what feels like an entire century.

Then Si-won slowly points at Hye-ryung.

"You."

"Yeah."

"You like him."

"Apparently."

"Oh my god."

"That's what I'm saying."

Neither of them looks angry anymore.

Just horrified.

Which somehow feels worse.

I finally find my voice.

"...Can I transfer schools?"

Both of them whip around.

"No."

The synchronized answer makes me groan and bury my face in my hands.

Of course.

Of course this is happening.

Because apparently the universe looked at my life and decided it wasn't complicated enough already.