#ksgift

MERRY CHRISTMAS, EVERYONE!

Santa left these presents for everyone overnight: @skarsgardb, @yelyahnichole, @bviewdrew, @quirkymisscb, @elisabetholsan, @evanpxtrs, @edwardhardy

Casper,

Yes, I’m still calling you Casper. You know why? Because I’m pretty sure after spending hours and hours of research on how to make marzipan that I, as Wendy, am going to join you in the afterlife. I know how much you love marzipan—trust me, I’m still trying to figure that one out—but making those delicious treats you love so much is almost impossible. No, it is impossible. One would think that making such a treat would be easy, but oh no, I’m telling you right now that whoever manages to make it is a witch. That’s right. There’s witches out there making the marzipan you love so much. And with a huge mess and hours of wasted time in the kitchen, and lots of disappointment later, I had to cave and buy you some gourmet marzipan that I hope you’re going to like better than any attempt I could have done. I mean... witches made the box and its contents, so it has to be good, right? 

I’m honestly still in awe that it’s been six months since we first began dating. Granted that things might not have gone so well in the beginning because of misunderstandings (can we blame it on the language barrier?) but it’s been worth every second. You taking out the guitar so we could perform together in your living room was one of the greatest moments and I hope this guitar pick necklace reminds you of the special night every time you wear it. And I know we’ve joked about getting old and being out of touch, but... mix tapes are still a thing, right? Right? Getting an actual mix tape was challenging so I found the next best thing so you can have some special music to listen to (tons of Johnny Cash on it, too) in a USB so you can listen to the songs whenever I’m away. I saved the best for last, though, because with a new XBox and a few old (and new!) Tony Hawk games, including this skateboard sensor, you can prove how much skill you have while playing. You’re going down.

All jokes aside, I really hope you know how much I love you and care about you. I’ve never been good with expressing my feelings in that way even though you deserve to hear that repeated every single day. You’ve been amazing to not only me but to Candice and I can’t tell you how much that means to me. How much you mean to me. These past six months have been some of the greatest of my life and I have you to thank for that. To another six more months, yeah?

Love,        Kesha.

Iwan,

I know that we might have ended things a little rocky the last time we saw each other so I thought convincing one of Santa’s elves to deliver this to you would be a good step towards an apology. I tried to have them drop this off to you on Christmas Day but they said they were too busy and—well, I don’t know how far I should go with this fake ass story before you think I’m seriously insane and decide to stay away for good. 

I’m not really that good at baking or cooking in general, but I tried my best to make you some gingerbread cookies. I hope you like them. It took me a long time but I managed to track down VHS tapes (are we old or what?) of the original Casper and Casper & Wendy from Disney that we can maybe watch together. You know... if you forgive me.

Merry Christmas Eve, Iwan. I hope you’re having a good holiday.

- Kesha.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, EVAN!

I never know what the hell to get you, I swear. You’re just... you. Which sounds like a bad thing but trust me; you’re one of a kind. And that’s a good thing! Which is why I started laughing when I had this t-shirt made to resemble a Jack Daniels bottle that says you’re limited edition and made out of genuine parts. We’re just going to ignore the part about you being vintage since you’re thirty now — or be in denial, your call — because everyone knows that thirty is the new twenty.** The last time I tried to get you a present we ended up with the potential for tons and tons of dick pictures. Instead of having that risk happen again with whatever I end up getting you, I thought you would appreciate being able to pick out your own gift with a visa gift card for $30. Get it, thirty bucks? No, I’m kidding. There’s a hundred dollars here for you on this gift card taped to an actual Jack Daniels bottle

....because we’re going to make your birthday great again. We’re going to hell. Love you, buddy.

xx Kesh

[ @evanpxtrs ]

HAPPY (belated) BIRTHDAY, ANDY!

I hope you know that if there was actually a way to bring a koala into the house, I would have done that for you — but this is the next best thing. You’re now officially the proud parent of the gorgeous Koala Fingal. Well, sorta. It’s a symbolic adoption certificate (not to mention these badass koala stickers) to show that you’re sponsoring this cute little guy every single month with a donation in your name. He was described as “quite energetic and it’s not unusual to see him actively exploring his enclosure at various times throughout the day. He is now a dad but he is still very much a child at heart himself.” I... I know, I’m finding the irony in the last part as much as you are right now, but. Before that came to light I thought I found your koala twin. He’s located at the Lone Pine Koala Sanctuary in Brisbane,

On top of that, I thought you might appreciate this Scratch Travel Journal for your adventures in the future. It’s a check-list, diary, travel planner and interactive map all in one. You can use it for when you go back on tour with the guys. In addition to that journal, I thought you might want something for your wall — maybe for that home studio you were talking about building — and came across this poster that you can hang up and scratch off all the places you’ve ever been. Again, you can use that for scratching off where you’ve been on tour, but I have a suggestion. You might want to scratch off Australia first because I got the both of us two round-trip airline tickets to Brisbane along with admission tickets at the sanctuary where you can see meet Fingal and hold him.

Things might be difficult with the timing issues after... everything that happened yesterday, but we can make this work. I know we can. I’m so, so, sorry that this wasn’t given to you on your actual birthday yesterday. I fucked everything up. I’m going to make that up to you, promise. I’m sorry, baby, and I love you. Remember that.

love,           kesha.

ANDY,

Merry Christmas! I’ve never been good at buying presents unless they were cat-related and/or sparkly so shopping for you to say the least was pretty difficult, but... I think you’re going to love what’s wrapped underneath the sparkly wrapping paper. There’s a little known fact about me liking to cross-stitch. Seriously. There’s nothing funnier to me than having funny and/or dirty statements on something that is supposed to proper and delicate. Since we’re both socially awkward and would rather stay inside most of the time, I thought you might appreciate this hand-made cross-stitch pattern that I spent time making for you.

You already have a ton of Bengals shit hanging out in your closet but what’s one more piece of clothing to add to your collection? I think the one I’m most excited to show you is this leather jacket with the batman logo on the front. Fucking badass, if I say so myself. It just screamed “ANDY!” with your love for leather jackets and batman combined. I just hope I got the right size and it’s not too big on you.

Last but not least, I was not about to forget that Koala with the leather jacket. They had a koala at build-a-bear and it was necessary of me to go through the torture of doing the whole scenario of bringing the stuffed animal to life — heart and all — all for the sake of you. If you squeeze the koala it has a voice box of my voice telling you that I love you. Because I do. 

You’ve only been in my life for a few short weeks but I wouldn’t have it any other way. People may say we rushed into something so soon after meeting but fuck the rest of the world. I’ve had butterflies in my stomach since the day that we met and knowing that you love someone from the time you first meet? That was what happened when I saw you, as crazy as that sounds, but it’s true. Merry Christmas, babe. I love you.