#kpixie rambles

Your eyes widened with fear as you turned to Stiles, who was attempting to sleep next to you, after a week of nightmares, waking up screaming - he had probably gotten a total of 8 hours of sleep in the past week. Your heart broke at the sight of him looking at you, something unexplainable swam in his whiskey irises illuminated by the moonlight.

“Oh Stiles,” you whispered, turning your body towards his, your hand traveling to his pale cheek. He was cold, which scared you, and he was crying, which scared you even more. Stiles was never known to break easily, he was a man of honor, portrayed himself as strong, when inside he saw himself as weak.

“I don’t know what to do anymore,” he admitted quietly, tears falling down his nose as he stared into your eyes, “I’m afraid to sleep (Y/N),” he paused. His own larger hand goes to your chin, brushing it softly before retracting it, “I'm afraid.”

You felt like sobbing right then and there, hearing those words fall from his mouth. After the past year of fighting supernatural, it was rare to hear Stiles admit to something like that, after his father almost got sacrificed, after almost losing you. He had to be strong, and especially in front of you.

It wasn’t your turn to be comforted though, instead it was his. You pulled his body into yours, his head resting under yours as you kissed the top of his head, his shoulders beginning to rack with sobs, “I just want to sleep Y/N. I’m tired of these nightmares, the days I think I’m dreaming-” He cut himself off, wrapping his strong arms around your lower frame, they almost felt weak.

You shushed him slowly, stroking his hair in comfort. Truthfully, you didn’t know what to say, you hadn’t gone through what the boy did, so you let him cry into your chest, holding him as much as needed, letting him release the feelings he was keeping within himself.

“It’s okay my love,” you began to whisper, “It’s okay to be tired, you’ve gone through so much, you’re only 17.” You continued to stroke the boy's hair, one hand moving to his back, “You’re the strongest person I know, Stiles.” You admitted, and this was true, out of the whole pack, you truly believed it.

The boy in your arms shook his head slowly, “That’s just it (Y/N),” he whispered, moving from your grasp to meet your eyes, “I’m not strong, I feel so weak. I’m human, I can’t do things the way you can, the way Scott can, I can’t do anything.”

You furrowed your eyebrows at the revelation of the boy's feelings, “Stiles…” You began, your voice low, “That’s not true,” you shook your head, your hands going to the boys under eyes wiping away the tears that continued to fall. “You’re the smartest, strongest person I’ve ever met. You are constantly there for the pack, we can always count on you for anything.” You kissed the boy's cheek tenderly, “You always figure shit out.” You smiled weakly at this statement, hoping to cheer the boy up, which you did slightly. His eyes lit up as they stared into your own.

He shook his head, wiping his tears haphazardly, “You don’t get it.”

Your heart shattered at these words, your eyes casting downward to your legs entangled with his. He was right, you didn’t get it, you never really would. But that wouldn't stop you from trying to understand, Stiles needed you to, whether he knew it or not.

It was silent for a while, your eyes drifting back up to the boy in front of you, his eyes already on you. “I couldn’t have done any of it without you (Y/N),” he spoke, his voice hoarse from crying. His hand moved to your cheek.

You held a small smile at his touch, something that’s always comforted you, “We couldn’t have done it without you. I couldn’t have done it without you Stiles.

His head shook, “I almost lost you (Y/N),” his voice broke with these words, tears fell again at the thought of that fateful night, you in his arms, dying. “There was nothing I could do to save you, I couldn’t take your pain, I couldn’t heal you-“ you cut him off, your gentle hand going to his chin.

“Stiles.” your soft voice echoing in his ears, “I don’t need that from you, what you did, holding me there, comforting me,” you stopped yourself, attempting to hold yourself together, thinking about the way he begged and pleaded for you to be okay that night. “You were everything I needed Stiles.” you pursed your lips, pulling your body closer to his, “You always will be.”

Stiles accepted you moving closer to him, he wrapped and arm around you and used his other to tilt your chin upwards, kissing you tenderly. As he pulled away there was a look of hope in his eye, but something else that you couldn’t decipher. He smiled weakly at you, “I love you (Y/N),” he whispered, his brown eyes scanning your face.